Sorry, I’m just very sensitive about this topic. I had to tell my adult children this weekend that their father and I are getting a divorce, but because I’m an ethical person, I can’t tell them why. I feel very alone.
Make that a really really good lawyer, and an accountant. If your FIL is hiding money your husband is too. I’m sorry.
Just saw your last post. What does being ethical have to do with not telling your kids the reason? If your husband would cheat you financially he would cheat them. If he can’t be trusted, they need to have some hint of that. Not all the dirty laundry, but enough to allow them to protect themselves. Your being a martyr will not help them.
My kids actually know more about our finances than my wife. She’s just not interested. I grew up in a upper middle class home in a small town where we were much better off than most. My siblings and I didn’t appreciate or understand money and took a lot of things for granted. We just assumed our parents could give us whatever they wanted to give us because they never explained the big picture to us. I want my kids to know that I’m happy to pay for things and we can afford it, but I want them to have some perspective too. I thought my parents had a money tree. I want to make sure my kids know that I don’t have one.
Not by me. I’m sorry about what you’re going through, but please make sure you protect yourself. Don’t let people use you. And be honest with your kids so they understand what you’re going through (I’m assuming they’re adults).