<p>Recently DS, a rising senior, made a bit of an about face on his number one school after visiting another school. School A, a college fairly well known for great academics, was his number one. However, School A is reputed to be somewhat straight-laced. </p>
<p>Since visiting School B (a little bit of a step down academically) and hearing and reading about more of an active party scene, he has decided he thinks School B fits him better. </p>
<p>Honestly I probably would have made the same call at his age. However as a parent I’m slightly nervous about it, even though School B is still a good school.</p>
<p>Just wondering if others are seeing their kids make similar choices??</p>
<p>Yes. We visited one of D1’s top choices after acceptance. It was the first sunny warm day after a long winter, there was no one on the quad playing music, sports, enjoying the day because they were studying for exams. She crossed the school out.</p>
<p>Both of my kids who are presently in college would have died a slow death at a straight laced university. They were admitted to a few, but chose to attend the “bit of a step down academically” university. Both are very happy, and are doing very well. </p>
<p>They wanted a more fully rounded life (as defined by them) than the more straight laced colleges could offer. We were fine with that. </p>
<p>However, we also had confidence that they would be able to make wise choices about study/fun/time management. </p>
<p>Do you have any doubts about your own child’s ability to turn down a party or football game because he has a paper due or a test to study for?</p>
<p>^ Eastcoast – I had to laugh about the “more fully rounded” phrase used by your kids. My son words it as “I want the true college experience.”</p>
<p>Regarding his ability to choose his studies over a party – if high school is any indication he should be fine. He has a 3.92 GPA and a rigorous course load. Funny thing is he’s not a partier now. But he must want that option.</p>
<p>I definitely think my oldest two’s choice of college was made based on both academics and which college they perceived would fit their desires and interests outside the classroom. Each had very individual reactions sometimes to the same college and I see distinct differences with #3 as we roll into the application season. I think if the kids have been making reasoned decisions along the way in high school about their class choices, their friend choices, the extracurriculars they participate in there is no compelling argument for not letting them make a decision between different colleges.</p>
<p>For D1, I think she picked the school because it has everything for her, best in her field, showed her the love with early acceptance in Jan and NMS scholarship. She had a full college experience. But, this is my observation, outside of honor classes, academic/intellectual related topics were rarely discussed. Luckily, she reads a lot and therefore will develop academically on her own eventually.
For D2, she is the life of the party. There is no need to encourage her more. Luckily, her college list has mostly academic serious colleges where fun is going die. She does not like sorority(not yet anyway).
She had a fantastic summer experience where some intellectual topics were discussed outside of the classroom. I’m secretly hoping colleges will develop her inner intellectual side.</p>
<p>It just crossed my mind how many of the “99%” chose the “I want to party more, study less” route. Seize the day, et cetera, meaning, if you want to party, go to a club, et cetera.</p>
<p>My son also picked a school lower down the selectivity ladder because he liked the social scene. The academics are rigorous and you really have to work at it, but he’s had a lot of fun too. As a freshman he engaged in a lot “bonding” with his classmates, and tried a lot of fun extracurriculars. Luckily, he didn’t lose it completely, he had a B- average instead of his usual all A record in high school. Sophomore year he buckled down and brought up his grades. Going into his junior year he talks as much about class choices and internships as he does about sports, clubs and friends, and he’s passionate about his major. He’ll be fine, he’s maturing, and he really loves his college.</p>
<p>My younger D is a few years away from choosing still but has a list of non-academic things that are “musts” for her. I don’t see them changing. She wants a school either with a church in her denomination on campus or close by. She wants an extracurricular dance program or team. She would like a choir, not performance quality, but some kind of choir she can join. She’d actually prefer less of a party scene but she would like there to be social opportunities as she’s a very social person.</p>
<p>Ultimately, she’d like a school like her middle/high school is-tough academics and high expectations but not all work and no play-even the seniors have “recess”. </p>
<p>Speaking from the experiences of my older kids-a strong student with good values will continue to have them no matter where s/he is. A student given more to having fun than good grades will continue that. BUT once out of school they’ll all do fine.</p>
<p>My sister partied her way through college. Her grades were “ok”, nothing more. She has worked steadily since graduating and recently in her 50’s changed careers completely and is one of the few people I know whose situation IMPROVED with the recession. She still loves to party and have fun. Still has a gazillion friends. But she has always known how to balance that out with work. I don’t think she’d change a thing.</p>
<p>Please, everybody, tell me where it is that fun is going to die. Tell me the names of the straight-laced schools. I am not kidding, and you can PM me if you prefer.</p>
<p>Our kids very much do NOT want a school where all everyone does is study. Sorry, but there is a lot more to being in college than sitting in the library fretting over your GPA. A couple schools that looked good to DS were WAY to serious for him, and he is a homebody. One school on DD’s list (they are recruiting her) is lower down on the academic chain enough so that it concerns me some but it also appears to be a VERY straight laced school, which concerns me more :D. It is very much a financial safety for her and will probably only attend that school if for some odd reason her other schools don’t grant the automatic merit aid along with the athletic aid they advertise :D.</p>
<p>While all of my kids value academics, all 3 would not look at any colleges that do not have a Greek system and football team (which translates to “fun” for them.) Fortunately, the majority of top colleges offers those two activities in some form.</p>
<p>DS picked a school that is more study than fun on purpose. He values the idea of great Friday and Saturday nights, but expects the rest of the week to be at the library. He spent time at our state’s two flagships and felt there was way too much partying going on.
He did insist on schools with solid Greek systems because he wanted the party to be there on the Friday night without putting much effort into planning.</p>
<p>MizzBee–it’s the schools where the “fun” on Friday and Saturday are spent in the library too that our kids don’t want. During the week, the kids at the schools our kids are considering are studying-but they don’t want that 7 days/week. They have zero interest in Greek, however, but have found plenty of schools that offer fun without having everything center around Greek.</p>
<p>How important? A lot, in our house, sigh. I blame myself. My kids have heard from me all of their lives how much I loved college and the rest of my schooling. I told Rachel that the best thing about college was that I remember it as a time where I laughed til I cried (or almost peed my pants) every. single. day. </p>
<p>Now, with good friends, you can have that at any college, including serious ones. But mine was not one of those (Wisconsin in the early 80s-- woohoo!).</p>
<p>I have no problem saying the name of the school, but most people on CC don’t know the school and would be surprised at how academically rigorous it is based on rankings. DS will attend Wabash College.</p>
<p>OP here: I didn’t think school naming was relevant for this thread. Besides son’s former top choice school is in fact considered quite fun . . . in a very wholesome way. Just not exactly what he is looking for. But it could be just the type of fun others are looking for.</p>
<p>My D2 is a rising HS senior, and for her academic intensity IS fun. By far her favorite life experience to date were the two summers she spent at an academic program where they completed 2 college courses for credit in three week period. It was crazy intense a group of profoundly gifted students; they worked & studied late into the night every night. If she could do that in college, it would be her dream. The party scene is of zero interest to her. She has friends (some of her closest friends she made at that summer program). But pretty much all of her ECs also have an intellectual slant (Quiz Bowl, Robotics, fencing, entomology, drawing & painting). So the “fun factor” actually might knock a school off her list…</p>
She does not like sorority(not yet anyway).