My DS always knew that he was applying to very selective schools (small shot at getting in) we could NOT afford at full price. We are also upper middle class so our income looks “fine” but paying 55K was not possible. One school worked out for acceptance and aid. If not, he would have gone to public HS. We would not have paid to attend a local private HS (the usual small city catholic HS in New England). IMO getting into a Lawrenceville (not his school) opens doors and opportunity. St Patrick Day School for 18K a year in Portland Maine (fictional) is not a wise investment because our local public HS is excellent and that is not the case for all. So for us aid was close to everything.
@southernfemmom – one thing I might suggest is that you spend a little time this weekend exploring some college NPCs on their sites and looking at some of the college FA threads.
If saving the money at school B is going to change the college landscape for you, I would think about that too. It’s a far more abstract exercise because it’s 4 years out, but overall, colleges are much less generous with FA than BS are.
It’s a hard call. But you are not deciding between a lousy public school and a great education. You are deciding between 2 good options…
How will spending that affect college plans? There are a lot of great colleges you can get for ~$40k/year. If you can spend that much for all your kids for high school and come up with similar amounts for college then your child can pick where whichever school she likes best. But if paying for college might be a problem then you may want to choose the less expensive boarding school.
@PrepDad2018 Similar situation over here. Really good LPS, but it simply cannot compare to what BS can offer her. Local PDS not worth the $ difference to us. Upper middle class (according to BS standards), so I am worried that we will get no FA. But without it, we cannot send DD to BS without compromising major things like retirement or doing something drastic like moving. Plus, we have 4 kids – so we can’t just eat ramen and decide to put all of our resources behind one kid. What about the other kids’ dreams and educations?
These are the things we are thinking about.
When we first decided to apply, we were clear about needing both an admission and some money behind the admission. But truth is: somewhere along the way, we’ve gotten so swept up in the momentum that I think this message kind of fell to the wayside. Suddenly, none of us pictured DD in our LPS anymore for next year.
So yesterday I sat down with DD to discuss options if we don’t get both admission and money, just as a gentle reminder before M10 arrives. Also, I’m anticipating M11 to be an emotional time, either way, so I felt like a conversation now was better timing, so that I know how to proceed come M11. (And this conversation a month ago would have been even better timing!). But – It was a really helpful, productive conversation where we – logically and unemotionally – considered options such as trying to find schools with second wave admissions and merit money still available, going to LPS for a year and trying again for 10th grade (which would reduce total cost by 25%, making our FA need lower. also would give her a chance to take a prep course and put out a better SSAT – she is at 80), and looking at all-girl schools. I was pleased that she agreed and understood about the various tradeoffs. If we end up with bad news on M10 (or good admission news but bad FA news), I think I know what to do behind the scenes while she mopes for a week or two. (Because M11 is when someone – me! – would need to spring into action if she wants to go to BS next year.)
My one lesson learned: I think I would have added 1 or 2 all-girl school options. Even though she still says she wants co-ed, I do wonder if she might have become more flexible depending on M10 options. And I believe that if we had visited some of those fantastic all-girl options, she probably would have fallen in love with at least one of them.
Really feeling good about our list – we carefully crafted it (thanks to many of you here on CC – THANK YOU!), and DD chances. Her applications were really solid outside of the softer test score. But, as the mom, I think it’s my job to be ready for what comes next, no matter what the result is.
@Calliemomofgirls sounds like a wonderful, positive conversation! I hope you get the acceptances and aid you want next week! If it doesn’t all go as you’d like, many of the girls’ schools have rolling admisssions and accept the SAO, so applying to those literally is just paying a fee, clicking a few buttons, and setting up an interview. If you want to PM me I can tell you what I have learned, so far, about aid a girls schools, girls schools in general, and why we are excited about a girls school for our daughter. (However, I’m going to be out of pocket for several hours because I am heading to my son’s track meet. I love track meets, but the last forever)
Thank you @southernfemmom ! I am open for the sharing of insights and experience and wisdom!! I’ll PM you.
In our case FA played a huge impact in our decision. We don’t have the means to pay 50-60k a year and when you look at the Gladchemms schools, I don’t think graduating from one versus the other makes that much of a difference. However having said this, we did take one of the offers and present it to our first choice which was a smaller school and a better fit in our mind, in the hopes that they would match or at least come close. In our case the school did match and we were able to select our top choice.
Our child knew they could only pick between schools that would cost a comparable amount after FA. That narrowed the list down.
@southernfemmom If one of the schools you are considering is Chatham Hall, let me know via PM/DM.
@CaliMex yes! Chatham Hall is one of the schools we are considering. I don’t think I am senior enough to PM you, but if you PM me I would love to chat. Thank you!!!