How saving baby geese shaped who I am

College Essays
1

<p>A while back, around when I was 10, I helped a group of about 8 baby geese cross the road, in which they got stuck behind the median and would have gotten run over if I hadn’t done anything. I was just messing around, and I ended up writing an essay on it. I basically just described the experience and my thoughts as I went through it. Is that a good essay topic? I’m not really sure, because I know you’re supposed to get a sense of who the person is, and I was only 10 when I had that experience. Please help me! I wrote the essay and felt pretty good about it, but then my mom said she didn’t like it =/</p>

<p>Thanks!</p>

2

<p>You are a hero. If they reject you, they hate kittens.</p>

3

<p>Ideally, an essay should be about something within the recent past … i.e., maybe HS years. Not to say that it wouldn’t work, but…</p>

4

<p>Unless you are an amazing writer and the geese piece shows this, I would not submit an essay entirely about saving geese eight years ago. You might take that long essay, cut it way down, and let it be a creative and charming lead to a new essay about who you are today.</p>

5

<p>so if I changed it around a little and just used it as an opening topic, would it be too random to talk about a different story that happened more recently? I don’t want my essay to seem like I’m just jumping around in different topics, you know?</p>

6

<p>Why am I reminded of Fly Away Home? Lol.</p>

7

<p>It really depends what you say about it. It’s certainly eye-catching.</p>

8

<p>A one paragraph lead story about how as a 10 year old you helped some geese cross a street COULD segue nicely to a cohesive essay about community service work you’ve done in high school or the ongoing help you’ve provided an elderly neighbor, or whatever might be the particular case for you. No, the essay cannot jump around and be random. Write the geese incident as a vivid short story. Be the 10 year old. Let it stand by itself; no moralizing or philosophizing here. One paragraph. Then abruptly segue to present day and the meat of your essay, which DETAILS ONE current community service activity of yours. Again, you might describe one incident but be more thorough here. Then in the conclusion you could/should loop back and address the significance of the geese incident. Connect the feelings that you had that day eight years ago with the ones you’ve had as a young adult offering help to others. Don’t overwrite the conclusion. Less is more. </p>

<p>I don’t think of Fly Away Home, rather the childhood classic Make Way for Ducklings, but to offer that dates me.</p>