How to Get a Perfect Essay Score on the SAT

Test Preparation SAT Preparation
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<p>I wrote this a while ago and just found it…enjoy. Be forewarned it contains a great deal of bias…</p>

<p>How to Get a Perfect Essay Score on the SAT</p>

<p>First of all, The new SAT is completely useless and warps students into mindless robots only capable of regurgitating facts and strategies that have no real use in society. I don’t know about you, but I doubt I’ll use “recalcitrant” in a sentence (it means “disobedient”) ever again. The writing SAT test covers the same subject matter as the old writing SAT II subject test, why couldn’t they have kept that? And just shy of five hours of testing bliss, the SAT tests students’ stomachs and bladders than it does mental capability. </p>

<p>The largest waste of time is the essay portion. I took the SAT in March, and wrote what I believed to be a perfect essay. Each paragraph told a story that included specific details, philosophical reflections on life, and references to contemporary society. I used complex sentence structure and well-developed vocabulary. I got a 9. </p>

<p>This time around, I studied–sentence by sentence–the technicalities of the sample “12” essay posted on the College Board website. Each essay is scaled on a score from 2 to 12, so I figured a phenomenal essay would be easy to reproduce if I merely studied what the kid (or grader) had written. This time on the SAT, I wrote a mediocre essay, hardly trying but instead focusing on the mindless mishmashes of information. I got a 12, the highest score obtainable. </p>

<p>I didn’t use complex sentence structure. I merely did the following, which I will explicate, so you can reap the benefits of my hard work:</p>

<p>1) Begin your first paragraph with a thesis statement. Make it short. Then, immediately make reference to a piece of literature. Go through each book you have ever read until you find a book that you can tie to the prompt. For example, in addressing a prompt about the importance of memories, I discussed “Riding the Bus with My Sister” by Rachel Simon, a true account of the author’s weekly travels on a city bus with her mentally ■■■■■■■■ sister. I was going to use “Death of a Salesman”, but instead thought that a mentally ■■■■■■■■ girl would evoke more pathos than a schitzophrenic old man. Consider your audience. </p>

<p>2) Go to paragraph 2. Don’t contradict your thesis statement. Now is the time to use an example from your own life. Do not attempt to tell an anecdote, instead focus on a person (or persons) whom you know that somehow affect the prompt. If you can’t think of anything, make it up. I completly fabricated a story about my relationship with my cousins at our beach house, and how we grow together each year. I don’t have a beach house. My closest cousin lives six hours away. Do the test graders know this? No. </p>

<p>3) Use another paragraph to write about a common event that both you and the graders have experienced. It could be a current event, past historical event that remains particuarly fresh in graders’ minds, or something as simple as brushing your teeth. Be sure to include concrete details! Use one or two sentences to describe whatever it is, and then move on into some sort of philosophical discussion. You may choose to completely string together a series of elaborate vocabulary words at this point. Be my guest. The graders have started skimming by this point, so big words will catch their eyes.</p>

<p>4) You probably won’t have enough time to read over your work at this point, but remember your main points and restate them. End your essay with a catchy sentence that is ten words or less. It should be so catchy that you can still remember it months from now. Mine was “Therein lies the beauty of remembrance.” Now, sleep and get ready for the next 4 1/2 hours of fun.</p>

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<p>Excellent post! Thanks for giving me a laugh. This would make a great college essay.</p>

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<p>Here’s some other helpful tips.</p>

<ol>
<li><p>Your essay is scanned onto a computer before the marker sees it so make sure your handwriting is dark and legible.</p></li>
<li><p>The markers are only instructed to spend 3 minutes reading your essay before scoring it. Of course, they could spend more time and actually try to mark it properly but… good joke.</p></li>
</ol>

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<p>Can the OP send us your essay (just to like review it?)?</p>

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<p>Or better, don’t start with a thesis statement. Develop that in your introduction. Have 2 body paragraphs, an intro and a conclusion. Use famous literature in one paragraph, preferably the latter of the two body paragraphs. Some examples that I have used are The Great Gatsby, Grapes of Wrath, Merchant of Venice, etc. Classical, well known literature is always a plus. Then, use contemporary ideas like economics, government, etc. But avoid bias. Avoid first person. Use the entire space of the two pages. Don’t leave any room. Reinforce your final ideas in your conclusion. And, btw, this comes from a person that has taken the new SAT three times to recieve essay scores of 11, 12, and 12.</p>

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<p>Excellent tip! Extremely helpful. Thanks!</p>

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<p>I don’t have my original essay, it has become submerged in the depths of the Collegeboard. If you really need my help, I could look over any practice essays you may have done in preparation. I’ve done this in the past for a few folks, and it’s been very successful.</p>

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<p>It’s ok, and thank you very much, it’s just I’d like to see how perfect-essay scorers perform under the pressure of the SAT.</p>

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<p>WHen you write your body paragraphs and relate them to your thesis, should you focus more on the details of your example, or how it connects to your thesis?</p>

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<p>weatherby, it seems like you start developing your body in your first paragraph?</p>

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<p>lmao yeah i have SAT prep books with pathetic essays that they consider "12"s</p>

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<p>To answer your question, gxing, I would do as much as you have time for. Honestly, you only have twenty-five minutes, but everyone knows those CollegeBoard folks go gaga over length. Do whatever you feel like you have time for. In a perfect scenerio, you would be able to both write a thesis and a one-sentence introduction. However, occasionally you will get stuck on a prompt where you spend time thinking about your response. In that situation, you’ll still rack up a bunch of points if you have a thesis.</p>

<p>Tellallyourfriends, the obvious situation would be to try and do both–though you don’t really have time in this 25-minute free-for-all. My personal advice would be to always-always-ALWAYS tie back to the thesis in your beginning and end paragraph. Ultimately, though, ANY details should only be included if they relate to what you’re trying to prove. Organization is key. If you can prove yourselve to be organized in this short time span, the Collegeboard folks will love you forever–it makes their tasks of grading that much easier. I hope that answers your question! :-)</p>

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<p>i found this quite useful:</p>

<p><a href=“http://collegeapps.about.com/od/thesatessay/qt/organization.htm[/url]”>http://collegeapps.about.com/od/thesatessay/qt/organization.htm&lt;/a&gt;&lt;/p&gt;

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<p>myweatherby-- You said to make a reference to literature in your intro paragraph, and then move on to other things in the body paragraphs/conclusion? Do you mean you don’t mention the literature thing after the first paragraph? I thought you’re supposed to summarize what you’re going to talk about in the intro…</p>

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<p>If time permits, by all means write a cohesive and eloquent introduction. Just remember that you only have 25 minutes to churn this mammoth essay out. It’s best to get started right away, after you have a clear and concise thesis. </p>

<p>Under an optimal scenerio, you would be able to fashion some elegant introductory paragraph. If you are a quick writer, by all means, indulge yourself. But if you stress out too much over your first sentence, you won’t have enough time to write the entire two pages given to us by the College Board–as much as they deny it, length is most definitely important.</p>

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<p>So it’s not considered desultory to go from a literary reference to a personal thing?</p>

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<p>I don’t believe these “essay” forumlas work that well. just look at 2005 test takers on CC. half of us followed that thing… grammatix’ method, which is pretty much a similar “template” and hardly anyone got 12 on their essays.</p>

<p>I personally got 10/10/10 on all three shots at my writing part. on my 2nd try, i followed grammatix’ formula exactly, and thought it was THE BEST SAT essay that i’ve ever written. BAM! 10, again. My highest writing also happened to be from that sitting, 780. If i got a 11, i would’ve gotten 800.</p>