<p>I’m a rising college junoir on a near full-ride merit scholarship. I’m involved in ECs/research/sorority life, don’t drink, and don’t sleep around. I get good grades for the most part (3.75 cumulative) and have a double major and a minor. But this past year, I’ve come to the realization that I like to party on the weekends some. I don’t drink, do drugs, etc., but I like to meet/dance with guys, chat with friends, etc. My parents don’t seem to buy this about me, to the point where they won’t let me get the Gardasil vaccine (still a virgin but if it gets that far, well… and if, Gd forbid, I ever get assaulted,…). I’ll never be “wild” (and I don’t want to be, really–I don’t intend to take up drinking, for example), but I do have at least a bit of a social side, too…</p>
<p>Presumably you are over 18 and are entitled to make your own medical decisions without parental consent, although you will probably have to pay for them if your parents would object to putting it on their insurance. Contact your college’s student wellness center to see if they offer discounted services.</p>
<p>One thing you might want to tell them is that the Gardasil vaccine is recommended only for women who are not sexually active. And since you will become sexually active at some point (I assume they want you to get married someday), getting the vaccine now is the most appropriate action you can take to protect your health.</p>
<p>The problem I have, though, is with your comment: “(still a virgin but if it gets that far, well… and if, Gd forbid, I ever get assaulted,…)” - it sounds like you believe that Gardasil is to prevent either pregnancy, STDs or HIV. It’s not. It is designed to prevent certain forms of cervical cancer. You will still require other forms of protection against pregnancy, STDs and HIV.</p>
<p>If you are over 18, you don’t need their permission.</p>
<p>I’m assuming that part of your problem is that the Gardacil vaccine is expensive. If you are on your parents’ insurance, do you have a card where you can call to ask about coverage? If not, you make likely have to keep talking to persuade them about the importance of this vaccine unless you can cough up the cash yourself. Good luck.</p>
<p>The issue about how to convince your folks to pay/arrange/provide for you to get the vaccine is touchy…they see it as a license for a “privilege” they do not wish you to have. This is one of those things about being an adult…you get to make decisions, keep it to yourself as a privacy issue, and take responsibility for making it happen, logistically and financially. Otherwise, it will not happen. We do not know your financial situation, but if you have funds from a job or an allowance, you can budget to pay for it, if you consider it to be an important priority. You may want your parents’ blessing on your adult life, its decisions and activities, but they do not have to give it, and you, as an adult, have to accept that and allow them that perspective. This is your problem, not theirs. </p>
<p>You would be able to get it at your school’s health services clinic, but you will have to pay for it yourself. Your parents would not be told, however, guaranteed, so long as you make arrangements to pay so that no bill will be sent…speak to the doctor about how to handle it. Good luck.</p>
<p>Being over 18, not only can you make your own medical decisions, but your doctors cannot reveal your medical info to your parents. But if you are on their insurance they will see the bill/explanation of claim.</p>
<p>You have every right to protect your health. Even if you do end up waiting until you’re married, how do your parents know your future husband won’t ever have made a single mistake in his past? Preventing cervical cancer is certainly worth it.</p>
<p>I don’t think Gardisil will protect against anything but HPV (and even that not at 100%)… All coverage goes through my dad (employer-based insurance), and they’d get records of anything…</p>
<p>But the bigger issue I’m having is that they seem totally unwilling to acknowledge that I party, dance, meet guys AT ALL.</p>
<p>If you’re still living at home, this situation gets a little tricky. It’s the old saying, “If you’re living under our roof, you have to live by our rules”. In this case, it may be time for you to get an apartment with some of your college friends.</p>
<p>If you’re living on campus, I don’t see the need for you to even engage in a conversation regarding the fact that you enjoy going out and socializing with guys. Knowing this bothers your parents, don’t discuss the issue with them. Divert the conversation to another topic.</p>
<p>You’re old enough to get the vaccine without their approval. You just have to pay for it yourself. The same goes for getting birth control. Go to the college clinic and pay for this stuff with your own money. It’s time for you to make your own decisions about these things and do what’s right for you.</p>
<p>Why are they having trouble with this? Is it religious or cultural? Or is there something in your family’s past that has caused them to act this way? I think that it is best to try to advise you based on the reason they are acting the way they do.</p>
<p>to Question-quest:
As previous poster noted, the Gardasil does not 100% prevent getting HPV virus that causes cervical cancer…but it is 100% effective against the virus types 16 & 18 that causes about 70% of all cervical cancers (so you are unprotected from 30%). I teach an abstinence program to eighth graders in some of the Catholic grade schools in my town…and it (the vaccine) does come up. I recommend the vaccine (i am a physician) because even if the young lady stays chaste until her marriage, there is a chance that maybe her husband-to-be made a bad choice (maybe only one sexual encounter) and he could have caught the HPV strain that causes cervical cancer. Anyone in the medical field knows how difficult it is to eradicate (totally) the HPV virus from the body…basically next to impossible. So this new couple could enter their married life and then the new wife could get infected with the virus… and potentially then develop cervical cancer. So i don’t see the vaccine as a license to be promiscuous but to prevent the spread of disease-causing cancer in a now manogamous committed relationship.</p>