<p>downtoearth: keeping you in thought and prayer, so glad to hear your daughters’ graduation and recital were wonderful. Please know that all of us here are pulling for you and your family. Thank you for keeping us posted.</p>
<p>yes you are all right. Sometimes I wonder what lesson I am supposed to be learning, ok already I’ll learn it! Not sure what I will actually have to do, until after surgery. I try not to project because then I get nutty. I also take medicine if I need it, with no shame. Just like childbirth - whatever gets you through. I have heard from some lovely ladies on PM, send a general prayer for all of those as well(including yourselves). After all of this college nonsense it really brings you back to what is important. D2 just finished finals and I am taking her for a mani/pedi. I still can’t believe I am doing this again UGGGGGG!!!</p>
<p>My best wishes to you, downtoearth. Isn’t there a saying “third time’s a charm?”</p>
<p>Hope your daughter enjoys the mani/pedi – must be a great feeling for her having finished the finals, etc. …I’m sure it must be hard to keep your mind focused on just regular wonderful life stuff but I guess that is what will get your through.</p>
<p>Sending all my best thoughts and hopes and prayers your way.</p>
<p>i have the tendancy to withdraw and mope, which does me no good. So i fight it and engage, because that is what life is all about. I don’t consider myself particularly strong so it is a fight, but I have things to keep me busy and my H to kick me in the but. all your well wishes have been so helpful, It’s hard to tell my friends you guys are good practice and although I never met you I feel your good thoughts and feel supported. please let me know what I can do for you.</p>
<p>What you can do for us: Fight the cancer, accept help and get well. :)</p>
<p>…and I too was very reluctant to ask for help or to tell people so I understand.</p>
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<p>A very wise decision, seeing how as chemo is really only effective in the really early stages. If you catch it really early there is really nothing to worry about. (Really early: a single cell with a vulnerable mutation that has yet to be detected yet.)</p>
<p>I actually don’t believe that is true. chemo is effective for all stages and women diagnosed in all stages can do well.</p>
<p>went on the internet BIG MISTAKE, in PANIC MODE. remember doing this before, BIG MISTAKE , How does one advocate for themselves without getting freaked. Any good sites to recommend one I went on was so negative. Need to take a walk , or something, I guess my bad day!!!</p>
<p>downtoearth, I am so sorry to hear your news. Take a look at [BreastCancer.org</a> - Breast Cancer Treatment Information and Pictures](<a href=“http://www.breastcancer.org%5DBreastCancer.org”>http://www.breastcancer.org) . It’s an excellent source of information about every aspect of bc. Information is factual and credible. Click on “discussion boards” to find discussions about every aspect of breast cancer ranging from types of cancers to dealing with friends/family/colleagues, choosing between treatments, reconstruction (or not), dealing with reoccurrence, etc. The quality of the comments is high, as is the level of compassion. It’s a good place to find women with similar diagnoses/experiences who can offer reassurance as well as tips from their personal experience. Kind of like a CC site, but for BC. Good luck to you.</p>
<p>I think that person up there glaosian is “■■■■■” how mean. look at home page I have been yelled at by H and 2 docs to stop researching until I know what I am dealing with. But I wii def chrck out the site after this bad day is over</p>
<p>My oncologist told me the same thing: Do not go on sites to research. But why? Because every person is different and every case is different. And that is a good thing…that the doctor sees you as a person, your challenge as different from room 2’s, and he or she will discuss YOUR case and treatment options with you.</p>
<p>My husband has gone on sites…at 3 in the morning was “stuff” came up. He was armed with information to help me. When I became depressed he would tell me that…blah blah…but he had cleared it my doctor first because, please remember ANYTHING can be on the internet…true or not…questionable or not…And no, I was not being treated like a child. I was armed with information about ME, not about someone else.</p>
<p>Yes good advice. I am waiting to have surgery to go my D’s orientation and the docs all say that is ok. but it draws out the process of not knowing which is so hard. I never was good at reading scenarios but I don’t have the same kind of cancer so I was tryng to figure it out. i have to let it be to be sane and function, not what i pictured this summer to be like sigh…</p>
<p>I would get totally freaked reading those discussion boards and sites. I would read about a woman with my stage and type of cancer who had mets and I would go crazy. I decided to get factual information about my specific type of cancer and then just stayed away.</p>
<p>yes It brought out some complications I had never considered, I just don’t need to know what may or may not happen. I could not go to support groups because ours was mixed and although I loved the women, I could not handle looking at my worst fear. I would come home crying and my H was like “what the?” I felt like i had to go for them but it beat me up so I stopped. Now I am thinking about one of them…anyway. I ave learned my lesson, I thought I could deal but guess not…It is nice to know I am not alone in my way of dealing.</p>
<p>I’m talking about the first time. (support group)</p>
<p>Well I am going to bed and saying a prayer for you all, for your good health and in thanks for getting me through a very difficult day, it is amazing how people are so kind and caring when they don’t even know you. I am in grateful tears for all your help!</p>
<p>downtoearth-You have done this before and you can do it again. Yes, it suck, but you will get through this, just like before. You are a stronger person now and have the support of your family. Make a list-When I am done with chemo/surgery/radiation (whatever you end up doing,) I will ______________________ (fill in the blank.) It is funny what little thing will make one happy. After my treatment 17 years ago, we were buying a new car. I had always had the mommy mobile and I wanted a sports car; well, driving carpool in a small car was not going to work. I remember telling my husband that I would get another mini van but I must have a sunroof and CD player. Do you know how happy I was to have those 2 items in my car; it was silly, but I was so happy.</p>
<p>Don’t dwell on the what ifs, you will make yourself sick with worry. Try thinking of what you will do to get your daughter ready of school; keep yourself busy with fun activities. My husband is my worrier, and it drives me crazy! I worry also, but he makes everything sound like it is the worst thing ever, and then is surprised with everything turns out well.</p>
<p>I know you have a while to you know what you are dealing with, but know we are all here. A shoulder to cry on whenever you need.</p>
<p>I was always a worrier and I think cancer made me less of one. My faith is very strong and my second son told me “mom, worrying is just a lack of faith” While I know God doesn’t keep all the bad away from you and faith will not keep things from happening to you, my faith has grown and I know that God is with me on whatever road I must travel.
The morning of my surgery my radiologist (who I always thought of as no personality doctors) said a prayer with me and gave me two prayer cards for my journey. He didn’t know if I was a person of faith but asked if I would like to pray. God works through others and he was there in that radiologist that morning. I went to my surgery with calm and peace.
May peace be with you in these days ahead and know that God walks your journey with you</p>
<p>Today going to mass to celebrate 25 th wedding anniversary. Older D said “we were too young to help you before now we can help you this time” Younger one gives lots of hugs.
Stupid Question and you are going to laugh but my brain is very befuddled and I have to get my house painted, hunter green shutters and door. What is a good color with that? I like historical colors. At he same time I am desparately trying to get her grad party planning done and keep losing the thread…</p>