How to keep the focus of the essay on "YOU" ?

College Essays
1

<p>For my essay, I am writing about the transformation of a family member. </p>

<p>I use this transformation to parallel with my own change.</p>

<p>The trouble is, I am having trouble keeping the attention on ME and in 500 words this is really difficult to do so. </p>

<p>The prompt is “Describe the world you come from — for example, your family, community or school — and tell us how your world has shaped your dreams and aspirations.”</p>

<p>I don’t really tell about my dreams or aspirations.</p>

<p>Should I use this other prompt? " Tell us about a personal quality, talent, accomplishment, contribution or experience that is important to you. What about this quality or accomplishment makes you proud and how does it relate to the person you are?
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<p>Any suggestions or tips?</p>

2

<p>aaaaaaaaaaBUMP</p>

3

<p>It’s a bit weird, but I asked my friends what they thought my best traits were and chose three to really emphasize in my essay. I chose passion and my compassion-save-the-world complex, and creativity.</p>

<p>Weave the parts of you that are relevant to your topic into the essay.</p>