When I look at people around me - family included - I see food/entertainment as a big bucket of $ that can be adjusted. It astounds me what I see others spending on eating out, alcohol, concerts, travel, etc. I’m not saying don’t have it, but examine and track your expenses here and curtail it.
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We have never eaten out on a regular basis. That was for when we had friends visiting from out of town, or for special occasions. So…not much savings for us there. Or while on our vacations.
As noted by @ChoatieMom, some of the things listed are things we did anyway…because that is the way we just lived, shopped, spent money.
But having one less person at home did create some automatic savings…as I noted above. Was it a HUGE amount? Probably not. BUT every penny counts!
@coolguy40 is there some amount you hope to save per month/year?
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We are a family of 7, so Costco was always popular here (executive membership but we always got back more than the cost). We have a food vacuum sealer (great to sous vide). I did learn to send my husband with a list instead of going myself to save money, I also do most of my grocery shopping online to prevent impulse purchases, I make a menu for the week. We eat what is in the fridge (I’m probably having gazpacho for breakfast). We very rarely eat out as a family, I definitely go to restaurants more with friends, I think about it as an activity. I need to get rid of cable, we mostly stream.
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Biggest ways to save that I know of are on big ticket expenses - cell phone plan, cable (we cut the cord years ago) and insurance. Eating out is another one - if you eat out often (I believe the average American eats out 4 times per week), cut back. We’ve never paid for services (lawn, housecleaning etc) but if folks have that you can start doing those things yourself.
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What I’m hearing is that many here are saying it’s their lifestyle. Which is great if that’s how you are.
My point is that you can do anything when it’s temporary. Ok I’ll color my hair and go to Supercuts while the kids are college. But I really like to go to the salon, and know that this is temporary.
This may not be a great analogy for @coolguy40 
but it could be something that you really like doing but are ok cutting back knowing that you’ll get back to it.
This is a bit meandering but I don’t want to get to the end of my life thinking that the thing I want to do is in the future. I am not a big spender but I also want to take that trip or do that activity.
Depending on your situation, you may by necessity have to go without, while others think that what you can’t do is necessary for them. So do what works for you.
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I’m not sure where OP lives, but the home where we raised our kids and still live in is larger than we need for this stage of our life. We have no intention of moving as we love where we live for a variety of reasons.
One area where we save some money is that we’ve learned to adjust both our internal body and our home thermostat.
We keep our house pretty cold in the winter, which in a strange way has encouraged us to cook at home a lot more…a good thing. We’re retired and spend most of our time in certain areas of the house. We find reading and watching tv with a throw on and a space heater if needed works wonderfully. ( I say “if needed, because for everyone familiar with cold weather climates, gusty winds are definitely felt in older homes.)
As an aside, I grew up in Chicago and had learned to equate space heaters with house fires. Let’s just say I still respect the hazard, but they’ve improved a lot!
Also, on the flip side we’ve gotten used to setting the thermostat higher in the summer. A quiet fan and a dehumidifier keeps it comfortable. For us it’s all about dew point. When it hits 60 the A/C goes on.
Years ago we bought our parents atomic clocks which display the temp. We gifted ourselves a couple and like them. We have one in the family room, one in our bedroom and one in the basement workout area. Which reminds me, perhaps you should start thinking about your gift budget before the holidays and talking with your daughter about it. Proactively discussing money with her not only helps with setting expectations, it also helps convey the important realities of personal finance.
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I’m the world’s worst handyman. I’m not allowed to go within 10 feet of an appliance with my toolbox 
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Don’t feel badly about being a repairman. We have a one acre almost lawn. We do NOT mow it ourselves, and didn’t even when our kids were in college. It would have meant getting a riding or large ride on push mower, and praying it didn’t rain on the weekend when we were able to mow. Hiring someone for that was well worth the money to us.
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We’re trying to pull together $1,000 a month for the next 2 years. This would allow us to pay for our daughter’s last 2 years of college, including an apartment. We’re doing this to avoid parental loans. She’ll still come out with about 10k in federal debt, but that’s more than reasonable.
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Might you consider having your daughter take the maximum Direct Loans? This would reduce the amount you parents need to “find” in about half…which seems reasonable.
Cutting $500 from your expenses seems like a reasonable task. $1000 will be more difficult.
Our kids took the Direct Loans, and our graduation gift to them was paying these loans off…which was a LOT less monthly than we were paying for college. Something to consider.
You mention an apartment for the final two years. I know this isn’t universal, but our kids lived in off campus housing the last two years, and it was less expensive than their on campus housing and meal plans cost. Do you know the relative costs of off campus housing? That might help with those final two years also.
Biggest cost savers for us…cable cost (we don’t have cable TV, and have DSL internet which works for us). Insurance costs…our broker found insurance that saved us almost $2000 a year. Then the small changes we saw as I noted in my first response.
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I agree with Thumper about considering having your D take the remaining $17K in student loans. I assume both parents are working? Any possibility for a parent to change jobs and earn more? Also your D can work in the summers, and possible during the school year to help with expenses (if that’s not already included in your budgeting.)
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And re: those Direct Loans…she can take them for freshman and sophomore years, and bank the extra money if you don’t need it for funding college now. Then add the total $7500 from each of junior and senior years… will that come close to meeting your financial goals?
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$12,000 a year is a bit different. How I would tackle…
#1 - no vacations for 4 years. Assuming you take at least 1 week vacation somewhere I year, I assume you could save a big chunk of it right there. Do a staycation at home. We didn’t go anywhere for years and have visited pretty much everything within a 4 hour radius of us.
#2 - do not visit your college student if it requires an overnight stay, except to move in/out and even then, only if absolutely necessary. My parents never once visited me at school, and I was only 4.5 hours away.
#3 - cut back birthdays/Christmas. When I was in school my birthday and Xmas presents were that my parents bought my books for me.
#4 - definitely look at cut back/raising thermostat. We’ve done this since moving into our 1910 house in 2006. When I had neighbors I could compare bills with… our peak winter months would be $600-700 (before we got the new boiler - now it’s $400-500), but my neighbors would be >$1000/month (and this was in 2006!) We also save a lot more than them in the summer. We keep it at 63* in the winter and 79* in the summer (with ceiling fans running 24-7)
#5 - I would not buy any clothes, accessories, etc. unless I absolutely HAD to.
#6 - if something breaks, patch and pray. Story of my life
#7 - eat a lot of rice and beans! (mostly joking)
#8 - I probably would want to cut cable and all streaming services. Not sure how H would react…
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That’s not all that far off. In our eating out days, our freezer had been building up food we haven’t been eating. Well, we have a nice food supply to draw on. Good news, though I’ll be expecting a raise this month, which hopefully should give the cushion we need.
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While you’re thinking about how to have less go out, you may also be able to get a little more in. I have friends that work as pet sitters, in grocery stores, in book stores, book-keepers, etc. All provide a bit of money, most have flexible schedules, several have employee discounts. I don’t know that this is feasible if you already work FT, but even some of those folks are on someone’s list to help with events.
Most of the folks I know who have done this enjoy it because they’ve picked gigs around things that they enjoy. (Personally, I m jealous of the one who helps a florist prepare and set up for events!)
You get to a point where you can’t cut anymore. This is a bit more elastic.
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Good ideas above. Per tracking expenses, I recommend also doing look-back via review of last year’s credit card report. For example, my Chase Visa reports do a great job of breaking expenses down per category (% and listing).
One idea for reducing expenses is to hang with friends who are trying to do the same.
It would be fair to ask student to find a small job on campus, if not already doing so. I was really proud when my daughter (who did not qualify financially for work study) found a a job listing for answering the campus helpline. That eventually led to a campus job on the computer tech support helpline, which actually was great for her resume too.
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I would go a step further with tracking credit card spending, and actually pull into Excel every transaction and then sort by vendor at year end. It can be eye-opening to see where your money is going! Some vendors are too broad to be useful; Costco and Amazon for example in my house.
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This. Just as we were adjusting mentally to life on one income (for at least a while) and two college tuitions, friends of ours called to say they had won a “free week” at a luxury condo at some resort in the Caribbean. So our only expenses would be flights and food! So exciting! They were baffled when we turned down the “free week”.
Agree it’s MUCH easier to hang with the folks in your circle who consider a 6 pack and a crock pot of chili, home made brownies and a game of Trivial Pursuit a fun Sunday night activity!
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In this day and age it might not be easy or safe to change a major job, as @Mwfan1921 brainstormed. Not a bad idea, but if a person is last in at a new job, they can be first out if things change. Perhaps in another situation this really would be the answer, but OP did say in the first post that a more lucrative job would include a move that the spouse doesn’t wish to do. And in an update, the OP is expecting a raise this month, which is great!
So now that a set financial goal of $12k/$1k per month is on the table, how does one come up with approximately $250 per week? I am assuming that budget cuts are pretty in place now that the daughter only has two more years of college (and that two years of adjusting have already passed). My research has brought up some ideas.
Side gigs that take into account your knowledge/job skills:
-freelance consulting
-online tutoring in an in-demand subject (you know programming?)
-in-person tutoring
-online/in person classes in a topic that you know
Side gigs that do not use specific work skills (can the spouse help?):
-Call center work (virtual, work from home)
-re-selling items online at a profit, usually in a niche genre
-pet sitting/dog walking
-hanging holiday lights (seasonal)
-assembling furniture for other people
-smaller moving gigs (on Task Rabbit)
-DoorDash/Instacart
Essentially sell sweat, time, or convenience to create value for prospective clients.
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She’s got 4 years of college, but she’s living at home going to community college for free. So we’re trying to make the best of these 2 years so she can go away to the college of her choice. Worst case scenario, she can live at home and go to the local university here, which we can absolutely afford.
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