<p>I rarely fall in love but when I do, I become to like the person very very much.
I think of that person every second of my life and I can’t focus on school work. So when I like somebody, I like that person too much that I spend all my time and energy thinking about that person to only get hurt very much at the end when I realize that that person and I don’t have the same feelings about each other and find myself left with shxtty grades and everything else that I have not taken care of while focusing so much on that person.
What is my problem? Is this normal when someone falls in love that they can’t get on with anything else in their lives but to think about that person? I like the feeling when I fall in love but now I am afraid. I am scared to like anyone because I know I will be so into that person when I do and I know I won’t be able to focus on anything else. I tried to control myself, I just can’t. How can I like somebody just enough that liking that person won’t hurt me???</p>
<p>I don’t think there’s anything you can do. I think it’s a normal feeling at first to constantly think about someone when a relationship is new. I used to think about my boyfriend all the time, and had to try hard to focus on work. Now that the relationship isn’t so new anymore I find that’s all settled down. </p>
<p>It’s just one of those things about life, you have to learn to focus on work when you have to, and personal life at other times. It will be like this your whole life, so you need to get used to it now.</p>
<p>clinger alert.</p>
<p>best advice, find that fault, theres always one thing you can find about anyone thats an instant turnoff</p>
<p>I know how you feel mate. The solution I’ve found is to just let it subside naturally, it always does. Meanwhile I numb the agony with nicotine and, when available, alcohol ;)</p>
<p>I’ve been through that :(.</p>
<p>Is it weird to like someone that you had small talk with once in class (admired him from afar ::sigh:: ) and get excited when you see him pop up on campus? It’s not like I have feelings for the guy, but when I see him my heart jumps. I don’t even know him! Well, I never introduced myself. But he seems like a great guy that I want to be friends with. :)</p>
<p>I feel like such a creep, although I haven’t gotten to that “Facebook creepin’” stage yet ::sobs in the corner:: :(</p>
<p>That’s kinda happened with me, only with a girl. And we’ve talked a few times. And now she seems to ignore me.</p>
<p>C’est my ****in vie.</p>
<p>Hormone therapy.</p>
<p>oh and whats even worse is actually coming across someone in your class you like who also likes you back but then not actually having any way of contacting them after the class ends and losing them in a sea of thousands of students GG</p>
<p>lifegr, do you physically injure yourself by any chance?</p>
<p>Rymd, if the person likes you back then what is stopping you from asking her for her phone number? The worst that could happen is she suddenly decides she doesn’t like you and instead ignores you, which seems unlikely if she does indeed share the same feelings for you that you have for her.</p>
<p>What’s much worse is knowing that you have very little to offer a woman.</p>
<p>^^ I don’t?..why would I do that…
I am not depressed…</p>
<p>You should probably occupy yourself with other things that actually engage your mind so that you have no room to think of them. But I don’t think you’re Bella from Twilight that wants to engage in adrenaline junkie activities. </p>
<p>Love is a leap. Hearts will be broken. But how are you ever going really know otherwise if you don’t take risks? I learned that lesson from The Pagemaster. Take your risks, let your heart get broken a few times, and you might just find that one guy who will balance you out. Not saying this happens always, 'cause it doesn’t (my girlfriend drives me insane 99% of the time). But you can’t regulate how much you like someone unless you decide you don’t like them. I mean, you can have a tolerance level of dislike, but I don’t think there’s really a way to put a cap on how much you can love someone and call it satisfied. </p>
<p>I would say try to focus on your work heavily and avoid “liking” a ton of guys, for the time being (if you’re not currently under a spell). If it’s dragging your grades down by your obsession with them, then it might be a red flag to see a therapist because you have a history of this. I mean, I knew this was a typical thing in high school, but I didn’t really imagine it would carry over to college where you’re so dead set on someone you’re drawing hearts and other hallmark card dribble on your notes in class. </p>
<p>Suggestions I threw out:Think about them getting you pregnant and ruining your life. Start volunteering at a childcare center and look at what accidental love can bring. Think of giving birth to Ron Burgundy. </p>
<p>I should go to sleep.</p>
<p>Get burnt a couple times. Life’ll beat it out of you.</p>
<p>This is just my opinion, but from what you describe it sounds like you’re in love with love itself rather than the person. The behavior you describe is obsessive and comes across as rather creepy and is quite frightening. Note that my interpretation of it being creepy and frightening is, of course, my opinion based on how I would feel if someone I was not into (or not that into) liked me to the point their daily life suffered.</p>
<p>It might seem silly, but if this is a constant problem (which you do indicate it is) you might want to consult counseling services on your campus. This is a serious issue that you’re letting it affect your life so much. There are such people as sexual addicts so why not love addicts? You yourself say you greatly enjoy that feeling of “being in love.” It sounds like you enjoy the “love” more than the person you think you love. It is also possible that there could be a deeper issue why you are seeking to cling yourself to another person so completely whether or not they feel the same for you. It would be best for you to go talk to someone professional if this keeps being an issue. Your grades will thank you.</p>