Since moving into my dorm I have been enjoying the freedom that comes with not having my parents looking over my shoulder at every move. While I have an amazing relationship with my father, me and my mom fight a lot, especially over breaks because I don’t spend enough time at home. I do this because I hate the fights that I get into with her and my younger sisters about my privacy and my life. My boyfriend and his grandmother offered to let me live with them over summer break, so that I can avoid the drama but still see my family whenever I want, but I’m not sure how my parents will take it or how to tell them. What do you think?
It sounds like you suspect it won’t go too well with them.
I don’t think my dad will care at all, he’s really big on letting us figure things out for ourselves, but my mother married her first husband at 18 and has expressed concerns about me being too serious with my boyfriend for my age. I’m just not sure how she is going to react and since they are supporting me financially in regards to college, I don’t want to upset them.
If your parents are anything like mine they would freak out and will start an argument. You mentioned they get angry because you’re not home often so that fact that you would rather live with your boyfriend over the summer will only make matters worse. Let your mother know how the arguing makes you feel and try to work something out
Well, you are an adult now.
If you are going to do it, it might be nice if you had an excuse for them to chew on so they don’t have to take the full brunt of the reality. Reasons would be things such as “it’s close to my Summer work”, or “I’m working on something Independent Study, so I need it quiet with no distractions”. Anything to keep from having to say you don’t want to be at home.
One thing you could do is talk to your dad privately. Tell him you are thinking about the summer and have an offer of a place to live. You are considering that over coming home because of the fights you and your mom get into…that you feel that getting into a fight about you not being home a lot causes you to not want to be home a lot. Having independence at school causes you to want to some level of independence at home. Of course you will let them know where you are going and help out around the house, but you are not interested in coming home to tension. What does he think and does he think he can get mom on board?
Where does your boyfriend live? Anywhere near your college?
If they are paying for your college, I’d bite the bullet and not do anything to piss them off until you’ve graduated and are an independent adult. Moving in with your boyfriend instead of coming home over the summer is like throwing lighter fuel on the fire that is your mom. Focus on graduating, getting out, and being independent from them, then you can do whatever you want.
You might not take my advice but I think you should go home for the summer. Your mother is fighting with you about you not being at home because she misses you and loves you. Trust me, family is forever and I know maybe you and your boyfriend is very much in love, but it will never replace that relationship you have with your mom. She is the one who raised you to become who you are today. I try to go home as much as possible, even though I go to college far away. I miss my mom when I am away. How bad will a summer be with your mom anyways? Unless you really hate her, which I really home you don’t. Hope you will rethink about it.
^I agree with @Katie922, honestly. I lived with my boyfriend’s family out of necessity in college - my own parents actually wouldn’t let me come back home (long story, but it was religiously motivated) - and it’s not the bliss you think it’ll be. I eventually married my boyfriend and I was very close with his family at this time - we’d been dating for close to 3-4 years at the time - and I loved his family. It’s still very awkward to live with family that’s not your own for any extended period of time. You never feel 100% comfortable, and it’s even more awkward when it’s your boyfriend’s family. You want to impress them, and the pressure of constantly looking good - even when you come home from working or whatever and you just want to lay around - can wear on you after a while!
Your mom fights with you because she loves you and she wants the best for you. You say that you fight with your mom (and younger sisters) about 1) not spending enough time at home and 2) about your privacy and your life. I’m not sure what that means…as for #1, have you talked to your mom about her expectations for how much you will be home? Are they realistic or does she basically expect you to be home all the time? Maybe you could schedule a weekly outing with her, just of the two of you, so she knows that she’ll get to spend a few hours just you and her every week without fail - and maybe make a deal that you’ll be home for dinner 3 or 4 nights a week. As for your younger sisters - what kind of privacy violations are they getting into with you? Is this something that could also be fixed with a conversation and some boundary setting? Do they want to see you more often; are they upset because they look up to you and they miss you?
Savor it while you can! I’m 7 years out of college and 900 miles away from my mom, and I miss her 
It’d be really nice to live near her again, and spend more time with her more often.