<p>Under the circumstances, maybe a gap year? She’d have enough time at home to motivate herself to be ready to leave, I bet :). Save some bucks for the stuff financial aid doesn’t cover and for her family, and really prepare for her applications next year.</p>
<p>It might be a big relief to know that she doesn’t have to rush into these deadlines this week, next week, end of month. She can schedule her subject and other tests. Maybe she can visit some colleges and do all the stuff a kid from a family with college-educated parents do during junior and senior year–investigating schools, figuring out what would be best for her.</p>
<p>Of course it’s only an option if she makes a plan NOW for the year.</p>
<p>“Although she may qualify for much more than a directional U, that may be a place she feels safe. I’m she she could use a lot of help just navigating that system.”</p>
<p>So true. She may feel safer going to directional U because it’s close to home. Additionally, with the family dynamic, she is at VERY high risk of dropping out after a semester or two. It would be important for her to have someone help her navigate the system at directional U and also it would be very important for her to have a sounding board…someone that she can talk to regarding her concerns about staying in college: feeling that she is not contributing financially to the family and maybe feeling like an outsider in college. </p>
<p>Could Op be that sounding board?
I agree with Myos that the girl should be reminded that if she does graduate from college, she will be able to help out financially with her family. (would it be more than if she went straight into the armed forces?) Also, if she took a gap year, it’s unlikely that she will ever go to college.</p>
<p>But definitely take her to see Mount Holyoke and show her what may be possible and cheaper and never considered before.</p>
<p>A school like Mount Holyoke may feel more unfamiliar, but will have every possible resource to ensure her success. In addition, the connections and opportunities will be unparalleled.
I get “comfort”, but isn’t it worth it to try to get the better deal so that her mother and siblings end up better off financially, first with the aid package, second from what the college will bring her?</p>
<p>Some private schools give excellent aid, University of Rochester is pretty far from NYC but give great need-based and merit aid to almost every student. It can’t hurt to apply and see what happens with aid.</p>