<p>Vacation starts this weekend. Our S finshes his summer internship next Friday. From his schedule it appears he won’t be able to join us for a few days at the beach. I feel guilty that he will not be joining us on vacation. However he says he will actually enjoy being home by himself since he will still be working full time.
Once his internsihip is completed, he will have about 3 weeks home still before he returns to school. He is hoping to get away and meet up with some of his college friends. So that will be his vacation.
This will be the first time we have not had family vacation together and I am feeling slightly guilty.
The good news is that there are about 10 familes going to the beach with us and most of their kids are in the same situation with work obligations and will only be there for a few days if at all. I guess they are growing up.
On a positive note, I can be the mom on the beach who can read an entire book or magazine without having to chase a kid or be on the lookout for where they are.
Has anyone else had this happen this summer? It’s kind of sad to me, however my H doesn’t seem to mind at all. Must be a mom thing.</p>
<p>Last year’s family vacation oldest DD could not join us due to work, I really respected her responsibility, it was a nothing type of job, but with good potential for fall work with her availability and I was glad she did not give it up for our trip. This summer middle DD had commitments and could not join in, but she is already prepping for next year.</p>
<p>Oldest DD has made her own plans to spend a week each with old friends in old places she used to live on her dime and on her time- kind of exciting.</p>
<p>I think they are happy to be respected as they grow up and not to be pressured to always come on the family trip-I told mine once they go to university, they are welcome to join us, but not expected to do so. We make our plans and we do check in with them in case juggling dates would make something work, but mainly we do our thing and let them join when they want- thus far we are doing pretty well at having them choose to come along, and i know it is because they want to :)</p>
<p>We’ve never had a family vacation and no one seems the worse for it. It sounds like your son is going to do exactly what he would like to to relax after all his hard work. Enjoy your vacation and try not to miss him too much!</p>
<p>No guilt at all for leaving college kid at home to go to his summer school classes and take care of the dog and mail (he forgot to take out the trash or load the dishwasher with his dirty dishes…)- it was a welcome break. In the past he was a terrible teen on trips (he sat in the car while we walked in a CA state forest once), H and I have much more fun not trying to accomodate him. I think he missed us since he had to manage the dog’s needs, including his fear of thunder, and there was no prepared food magically appearing. It is a relief that he is 18 and we don’t have to worry about being reachable for emergencies. We’re also seeing more of the older/retired set in places as we are able to take vacations during school time, letting the partners with school age children use their kids’ vacation time.</p>
<p>My D is at Aspen as a participant in the summer music festival. I don’t think I have anything to feel guilty about.</p>
<p>Our family vacations consisted of us sending him away during the summer and my wife and I going on vacation. That was good for all of us.</p>
<p>wis75 Thanks you just reminded me that with him home while we are gone he can take care of the pets. They do not like it when everyone is gone for any length of time.
I am going to make sure he knows that the dishwasher is next to the sink. The dishes never seem to quite make it in there.
Last year we waited until he left for school and then H and I joined others for a trip to Ireland. No guilt during that trip, this one is just seems different since he is home. Oh well, he is happy with his choice and so I will be too.</p>
<p>justthismom
don’t feel guilty, this is the way its going to be in your life from now on.My older one(25-grad PhD student) just came home for a visit, its the first time we’ve seen her since Christmas.She has a life in another part of the country, we have responsibilities here at home (including an elderly mothers needs).
My younger is home but his internship keeps him so busy (slave labor by my standards) that I literally see him for 10 minutes a day on gamedays (baseball internship) and I do that by setting an alarm and making him coffee in the morning. He returns after I’m asleep. He’s had about 3 days off since starting and began the day after he drove home and is working until the day before he returns to school. He considers returning to school his vacation this year!</p>
<p>This is the first year that one of the young adults will not be able to join us, due to real job issues (already graduated from college). I AM feeling guilty because she would really like to be able to be with us, but can’t due to the timing of the vacation and her job responsibilities. I find it sad, but life goes on. We will miss her.</p>
<p>This day will be coming for us very soon, I fear. Still managed to vacation together this year, but I don’t know about next year.</p>
<p>Don’t feel guilty, but I don’t blame you for feeling sad either. Passing of a wonderful era.</p>
<p>Don’t feel guilty. H and I are planning to go on a vacation next month after we drop S2 off for his freshman yr. S1 is unavailable due to summer committments and S2 would rather stay home by himself and eat bugs than have to go off with just H and I.</p>
<p>Guilty? No.
A little nostalgic or pensive? Maybe.</p>
<p>I am writing this from lovely Cape Cod, where the two girls and I are visiting my mother (and painting her deck and bringing her home with us for a medical appt). So many young families with little kids up here! Our two boys are home with H. They preferred to stay home for their summer jobs and social life with friends. I’d rather they stay where they are happiest, and they’ve been here many times before. The best part is the lack of bickering! The worst part is trying to keep track of what’s going at home. For ex: I know they’re out at a party tonight, and I’m one of those parents who likes to see that everyone has arrived home safely. Hmm. </p>
<p>I know it will be a big step when they are ALL off on their own, though. Just H. and I?? It will certainly be different.</p>
<p>My suggestion to the OP would be to take advantage of all the things YOU like to do best - walk, bike, enjoy the sunsets, take some beautiful pictures, shop, etc</p>
<p>My family left me because I was shadowing some surgeons at the hospital. My parents planned the vacation before I landed the shadowing, so they went without me. I liked being at home for the week though, and got some extra cash for watching the dogs and taking care of the mail and newspaper.</p>
<p>This year we aren’t taking a summer vacation. In the past we’ve camped. It started out that we’d go camping for a week. Then, when the kids got summer jobs, it was cut down to five days. Then four. Last year it was only three days, and this year we aren’t taking any vacation at all. I do feel a little sad about that, but that’s just the way things work out. </p>
<p>H and I might go away for a weekend, but we aren’t going to take any kind of vacation as a couple either.</p>
<p>Justthismom – No reason to feel guilty. I have a suggestion, though. Are any of those ten other families a couple with young kids? You’d be a hero if you would offer to babysit their little ones for an evening so the couple can go out to dinner sans kids.</p>
<p>Last year was our first year. We have vacationed with some dear friends every summer for many years (almost 20 years now), and last year was the first year that some of the children were unable to come at all during the week - other than a memorable trip with just the parents back in the 90s. Luckily, the kids are fairly evenly divided into the younger bunch and the older bunch, and all 3 of the older kids could not come, so no one felt as badly as they would being the only left out person.
This year all 6 of the kids were present, and there was a lot of nostalgia, next year the last one graduates from high school, and we may move the whole enterprise to the fall or spring, so that may be the end of a tradition.</p>