<p>Ever sense I was 9 years old I wanted to be a musician. I wrote a lot of songs, practiced guitar, and studied music. When I was 14, I was very good at guitar for my age. I played in a talent show, I was in jazzband, and this one musician, who would play for Bob Dylan before shows, encouraged me to pursue it. But when I was 16, I started to have personal problems, and I practiced less and dropped out of jazzbanad. 17 years old, I got my grades back up, and was getting straight As and was in advanced placement, and was doing better personally, but I wasn’t playing music. After high school, I practiced a lot and got more or less to the skill level I was when I was 15.</p>
<p>Now I am 20, and I am in community college. I have about 40 credits and have a 4.0 and could get into a good college and probably have a successful career. But I feel weird, sad, and confused, because in my heart of hearts I want to be a successful musician. Sometimes I wish I would of dropped out of high school when I was 15 to pursue it honestly. I feel like I don’t want a normal life and am worried I will be miserable if I have to work in an office or for a business someday. Also, one day I am going to be dead, and I wonder if it will be worth it playing it safe.</p>
<p>I never even tried, never was in a band or uploaded any music, etc.</p>
<p>I’m really confused, what should I do? some insight would be helpful. its actually taking a toll on my personal life, i could be spending more time having fun and forming better relationships, etc. maybe i should compromise in some way, just try this summer and see if i am good enough? but that seems like it could be a waste of time.</p>
<p>i’m tired, sorry this isn’t really well written.</p>