I’m currently a first-year at Montclair State University (but by the end of the semester I’ll have 42 credits). Honestly, I only went here because they paid for my whole tuition, but I really did not want to go there. The day after my graduation my mom got into a car accident and I hadn’t picked a college yet, so I just chose whichever would’ve been closest to me because I had to take care of her. My mother is now doing better and is about to go back to work.
I’m applying to BU and other colleges, but BU is my main one. It’s about 3-4 hours away from me so it isn’t that far but I’m also afraid of leaving because one of my main responsibilities is taking care of my dogs (I know it’s stupid but it limits me from doing so many things, it has become a huge chore since my parents don’t help me). I’m afraid my dad won’t let me go, if I do get accepted, just because I have to take care of the dogs (he is like that). I talked to my mom and she’s become more mindful about how I feel trapped in my current school, but I’m scared to talk to my dad.
I have a daughter who is a graduate student at BU, and a Montclair commuter (started at Rutgers). My first concern would be cost, since BU is very expensive. I think the quality of education is better at BU (my son is a junior, has a 3.8 and phones it in, not complaining since he had some mental health issues so I think this is fine for him). Obviously geographically they are very different campuses.
Are BU and other colleges you are considering affordable?
Can you spend more time on campus at Montclair? Don’t just go for class and leave – get involved in activities, study at the library, eat lunch in the dining hall, seek out friendships, etc. These things can be done as a commuting student and may help you feel less trapped there.
Why did you choose to take on the responsibility and expense of owning dogs? Can you find a caregiver for the dogs other than your parents if you go away for college?
You’re a good daughter for having spent that time with your mother. I’m sure she’ll cherish that time and appreciated the sacrifice you made (or I hope she does at least).
Since you’re saving money at Montclair, can you take 2.5k of your freshman federal loans and “bank” that to pay someone who’ll take care of the dogs once you’re away? Or could you look for colleges where dogs are welcome in dorms?
Do run the NPC on a lot of colleges - beside BU what other colleges are you considering?
What’s your budget ?
You’re a good daughter for having spent that time with your mother. I’m sure she’ll cherish that time and appreciated the sacrifice you made (or I hope she does at least).