I really really hate having a roommate in college. My roommate is so annoying. Whenever she is in the room she does nothing but play on her phone, clear her throat, crack bones in her body. She also loves to open the window even though it’s freezing outside and makes the room super cold. She always loves turning on her fan in the room which is so loud that I have trouble listening to music. She also sleeps till like noon every day and takes a nap every single day. She never talks to me either she always walks into the room and never says hi to me and whenever i walk into the room she never says hi to me. I’m an introvert so I like having my alone time but she thinks she can just barge into the room at any time and be in the room when I want my alone time. Whenever she’s in the room I just give her dirty looks to give her the hint to go away and when I hear her opening the combination I groan to hopefully get her to change her mind about coming into the room. I hate having a roommate so much I just want my damn alone time.
This is none of your concern.
Have you requested a change of roommate for spring semester? Or request a private room, which will cost more.
I’m just saying it’s annoying how much she sleeps. She sleeps on average like 12 hours a day
I tried to request a private room for next semester but they wouldn’t give one to me because i’m a freshmen
It can be hard to adjust to having a roommate, particularly if you’re on different wavelengths, but this
is unfair. Your roommate has the right top be in the room whenever she wants. Perhaps all the groaning and dirty looks are why she doesn’t greet you when she enters the room.
I get the need for alone time but you can’t demand your roommate give it to you. Is there someplace on campus you can use as a getaway spot? Some little-used lounge, study room or other spot where you can get some privacy without displacing your roommate?
I think you have to look in the mirror and take some of the blame for the situation. Good roommates don’t necessarily have to be best friends but they need to co-exist. That takes both people working together. If it is intolerable then ask to move rooms next semester. Recognize that you don’t have a roommate who is a total disaster (ex. she does not appear to be someone who keeps you up all night, smokes/parties in your room, brings in random guys for hookups every night etc.). And consider what you can improve upon to be more considerate roommate such as the comments below:
– “Whenever she’s in the room I just give her dirty looks to give her the hint to go away” - That may have something to do with why she doesn’t greet you with a hello and a smile when she comes into the room.
– “she thinks she can just barge into the room at any time and be in the room when I want my alone time” – She can. It is her room as much as it is yours. It is shared space. If you need alone time, you need to find somewhere else (ex. a study room in the library etc.).
– “She always loves turning on her fan in the room which is so loud that I have trouble listening to music” – Maybe she puts the fan on because she doesn’t want to hear your music. In any event noise cancelling headphones should solve this easily.
–“She also sleeps till like noon every day and takes a nap every single day” – Some people need more sleep than others and this is her bedroom. No reason this should be an issue for you.
– In terms of room temperature that is something you can discuss with her in a polite, reasonable manner and come to a compromise.
Why don’t you just request a single next semester?
I will be blunt: you sound like a very difficult person to live with. Why are you taking note of her clearing her throat and cracking her knuckles? Those are normal things. Wear your headphones to listen to music. Giving her dirty looks because she naps and opens the window? Groaning because she’s coming into her own room? Wow.
For what it’s worth, that roommate sounds like she would drive me crazy too. OP, here’s one thing to keep in your mind – there are only X months left and then you will never need to see her again.
Wow, your expectations are unreasonable. You sound like a lady I know who complained to me that she hates the way her husband breathes. SMH
You enter a room, you make the greeting. That’s just polite. Great advice above and just keep in mind, she could have a whole list about you, too. Just get along and be nice to people.
I know this is hard -but it is unreasonable for you to think you have the right to time alone in the room. You don’t -you both pay for the room and you both get to be there.
Have you checked out those Pod things ? They are like a little tent that goes over the bed that you can zip up.
Also at this point with the dirty looks from you etc… She is probably deliberately cracking her back and coughing to wind you up.
I think the title of your post sums up your problem " I hate having a roommate". Any person would bother you because the presence of another person is what you resent. Alone time is not guaranteed in college dorms, they are small rooms and both parties have a right to be in their room at any time.
I don’t think you’ll ever be happy with a roommate. Request a single, you sound pretty OCD if you’re getting down to nit picky things like how much/when a person sleeps and when they crack their bones. Maybe you should put on some headphones. They make noise cancelling ones you know, have for years.
When you say “she thinks she can just barge into the room at any time and be in the room when I want my alone time.”
Bad news. It’s her room. She CAN " just barge into her room at any time and be in the room when (you) want (your) alone time."
You need to pay extra for a single.
You sound absolutely miserable.
I feel sorry for your roommate. Guess what? She pays tuition just like you do. I’d be super piss*d if my daughter wound up living with someone who felt they had more rights to the dorm room than she did. Honestly, your post is what I fear most for my daughter when she goes off to college. Winding up with an entitled princess (prince) like you’re sounding in your post.
Put yourself (and your roommate) out of YOUR misery. Get a single room ASAP!
In order to try to get what you want, you have to communicate with your roommate. If you want “alone time” in the room for a certain time period each day, then you actually have to talk to your roommate and tell her your request.
If neither of you is even saying hello to each other, then you’re both being rude and childish. Grow up.
However, if what you really want is to have an undetermined amount of “alone time” at random times of day on any particular day of the week whenever you want, you will never get that in this particular living situation.
The only way you will get that is by not having a roommate at all…when you have the bedroom to yourself 100% of the time.
Cracking knuckles and stuff like that? Yes, that would definitely get annoying after awhile. But look at it from another point of view. Perhaps there are things that you are doing which really annoy her. Neither of you really knows for sure what annoys the other person because nobody is talking to each other.
You could get some noise-cancelling head phones. Ear plugs. Something like that which could tune out your roommate’s noises. You could listen to music using head phones or ear buds.
Why do your roommate’s sleep habits bother you so much?
What do you do during “alone time?” What purpose does your alone time serve for you personally? For example, do you find that you usually need a certain amount of time each day where you don’t have to interact with people and be social with them? Or do you also use “alone time” to study? If so, can you also study in the library, in a common room in your dorm, or somewhere else or does your ideal study environment absolutely have to be you in your bedroom with music playing in the background and with nobody else in the room?
Does “alone time” mean:
- nobody but you is in the room
- you listen to your music without head phones as loud or quiet as you want
- you watch whatever TV show you want without head phones as loud or quiet as you want
- you talk to friends/family on the phone and you don’t want other people hearing what you are saying
You might need to consider being a little more flexible.
Chalk it up to a learning experience and move off campus next year.
I’m an introvert, too, and I hated having roommates in college. But I made things tolerable by being polite, cordial, and respectful. Try that.
Were you an only child growing up? Sometimes adjusting to living in close proximity to someone else can be hard. If those are the only “problems” you have with your roommate, I’d gladly would have taken yours over mine when I was a freshman.
Sometimes two people just don’t like each other or can’t stand certain habits. Or some people are obtuse about their actions. I had one roommate in college who spent all days with the same people and then returns to our room at 11 or 12 pm and then yap for another hour with the same people while I was trying to sleep. I finally had enough and I pretended to call my own friend and started yapping even louder. That fixed things.
The joys of dorm life!
Your options are fairly limited as people do not tend to change too much and what you describe seems like something this woman just does. Keep trying for a single dorm room or maybe room with a friend of yours that shares your lifestyle.
Freshman year is always the worst because the college matches you up with some stranger and it is not much better than random. Once on campus, people make friends and then pair up with new roommates after the initial match.
Good luck.