Yes, let’s tell this to the thousands upon thousands of young Black and Hispanic men who are stopped because of their color “They view you as a threat, but don’t let them define you.” Let’s tell them “Ignore the awes of wonder and the incredulous remarks of ‘But you’re black’”. Let’s just tell them that the injustices they face everyday are “just getting to them”. Let’s just tell them “Get over it. You’re just letting it get to you.”</p>
<p>How do you tell a child that? How can you ultimately raise a child full of love and confidence for them and their own to accept the questionings of their identity and individuality they receive everyday? Better yet, why would you want to raise a child to accept such a thing? You wouldn’t. And parents around this nation shouldn’t have to.</p>
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It does not take a racist to say racist things. </p>
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This would work in a perfect world. Our world of today is anything but perfect. While I agree with not letting your race, religion, sex, or sexual orientation rationalize why you may have it tougher than someone else, there is no denying that your race, religion, sex, or sexual orientation can be the cause of unwarranted discrimination. </p>
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Speaking out against the social discriminations you face is not “wallowing in self-pity”. It is recognizing your worth and proclaiming it to the world that disvalues you. It is anything, but self-pity. </p>
<p>Words hurt. They really do. You cannot deny the pain of the burn that is inflicted by your own classmate when he calls you “N–” in class. You cannot deny the “crisis” an adolescent goes through when their friend group ultimately marginalizes them due to their own race. You cannot deny the pain that young black girls go through growing up. This is another thread as I am getting off topic. </p>
<p>Those who are guilty of these actions must be made aware that their actions are not “harmless” or “just a joke”. </p>
<p>So true. And each of us gets to choose for ourselves whether or not the attitudes and behaviors of a small number of people will cause us to continue to continually view ourselves as victims. </p>
<p>I didn’t see these young people wallowing in self-pity or excusing failure AT ALL. They’re simply calling out the ignorance that they have faced, even in a place noted for being filled with very bright people.To me the point is that despite claims of this being a “post-racial” America, it is not, in fact. Some of the responses here prove that. These young people calling attention to the remarks are being painted as losers by non-African Americans. Isn’t that proving their point?</p>
<p>Sure, we all teach our kids to just let things like this roll off their backs. But the old saying “Sticks and stones may break my bones, but words will never harm me” is a lie. Words can hurt more and for much longer than a temporary broken bone. </p>
<p>Maybe it’s a small number of people that say these types of things, but it’s clearly large enough to be hurtful. It’s not as if all 63 are calling out the same person</p>
<p>Niquii–if you read my post carefully is said I explained. That is dealing with it. I just did it matter-factly without taking the comment personally. You don’t need a soapbox or attack people to make a point.</p>
<p>Very true, shravas. A small number of people can say hurtful things that make waves through a small community. And to think these 63 students are the ones who spoke out. There are many more students. </p>
<p>@barrons, I do not understand what “it” refers to, nor do I understand the meaning of your last sentence. </p>
<p>EDIT: Oh, now I understand what you’re saying. Yes, I do remember reading that you simply answered the questions people asked you. I still do not understand your last sentence. I will assume you are not referring to me, given how I have not attacked you.</p>
<p>the quote that i found most on target was “you’re lucky to be black…so easy to get into college”…I see that every day on CC…someone will put up so-so stats for Ivy and the response is “your stats don’t look great but since you’re hispanic…” and it’s got to sting…it’s such a painful way of playing down accomplishment…</p>
<p>Yes, SouthernHope, that was the first thing I noticed when I found CC. My D heard some version of that in a school gifted program, and the parents still a part of it (we’ve long since left) often comment on how the score requirement to get in was “dumbed down” to allow more minorities to get in. The very first time she struggled a little, both her teacher and a classmate suggested she “didn’t belong” (she was the only black student in her class). </p>
<p>I find the “get over it or get bitter” or “They shouldn’t be victims” quite ironic on this thread considering we’re talking about the issue of race and Harvard considering my experiences as a observer of two incidents on campus.</p>
<p>When I took a post-college summer class there several years ago, the campus and Crimson were in a justified uproar after police were called in to surround and question what turned out to be a group of Black Harvard students minding their own business, quietly having a picnic, and having every right to be there. </p>
<p>Another case occurred a few years later when my older college classmate and bona-fide PhD student who is Black kept getting stopped and questioned several times while he was giving me a tour his department and adjacent areas of the campus. In a few cases, the cops assumed I was the Harvard student and he wasn’t when it was actually the exact reverse. </p>
<p>It wasn’t too long afterwards that the campus police’s own administration publicly admitted they had a serious issue with profiling students and were expressing willingness to participate in some campus workshop to deal with this problem. </p>
<p>Oh, wow, cobrat! That’s pretty big of the administration to admit to something like that. Has anyone noticed change?</p>
<p>SouthernHope, it does sting. The upside to this is that as one establishes one’s self and gets a strong grip on their academics, the naysayers soon realize their first impressions were quite wrong. </p>
<p>EDIT: Didn’t see your post there, @Saona63, until now. Please give your son a pat on the back for me. I have yet to share my story, but I look favorably on those who tell theirs. </p>
<p>The one that got me was, “He’s a very articulate black man.” My parents used to say stuff like that all the time. They had good intentions, but . . .</p>
<p>I was not saying you (N) were attacking me–I was saying one does not need to get on some public soapbox to deal with such issues. I prefer on to one Q & A. And if you are certain you belong wherever it’s no big deal. I too got the you dont have an accent thing–but it was usually about not having the classic NJ accent. . </p>
<p>Sorry, I am tired of hearing about how hard life is because someone said something hurtful to you. Guess what, many of us had to endure things we may not have liked because of race, ethnicity or religion. I found some of those signs to be idiotic. Like the one that said: you can touch my hair it won’t hurt you. It’s hard to take them seriously with stuff like that. </p>
<p>I guess it is the difference in listening to Al Sharpton or Bill Cosby. Cosby makes a lot of sense; Sharpton is a self-serving race baiter.</p>
<p>I find that the people who insist that victims should suck it up and just be strong, are never actually subject to the kind of snotty comments, snide and denigrating and humiliating remarks and actions that have been adduced here. The people who don’t get it, aren’t the people who’ve been on the receiving end. You shouldn’t have to fear the police assuming you don’t belong because you’re black, anymore than you should have to put up with people asserting to your face that you “only got in because you’re black.” It’s wrong, and there is no virtue, none, in putting up with nastiness and humiliation. </p>
<p>Oh, the hair thing! Yes, I suppose someone who walks around without their hair being the subject of odd curiosity might find a comment about it idiotic. Complete strangers cross into my D’s personal space and feel it without asking. Or she’s had comments when it’s in braids asking if it made her head bleed. Does she let this derail her daily life? Of course not! But I’m 55 years old and no one has ever randomly touched my hair. There isn’t a black person I know who hasn’t had some weird hair experience. It’s not idiotic, it’s about personal space and respect, along with ignorance. What DO white people think black hair feels like??</p>