I was invited to a meeting with the dean and his associate, His associate is the one who wanted to meet. Honestly I do not want to prolong this any further, what happened happened, I feel uncomfortable going and I’d rather send an apology letter. I have already been dismissed from the class recieving an F for it. I just want to move on with my life. Is it a requirement that I go and meet with them? Does it send a bad message to them that I am not appearing. What would you do in my situation?
You need to check the school’s rules to determine whether this meeting is required under the circumstances, If it is and you don’t go, you may open yourself up to a further round of discipline. Even if it isn’t, I suggest you attend anyway. You have an opportunity to show contrition and to demonstrate that this was a one off and not who you truly are.
Have you found out whether you will be permitted to retake the class at some later point and, if you are, whether there is any chance the F can be expunged or at least removed from your GPA?
What “happened”?
It compounds the disrespect. They want to admonish you and try to save your soul. You owe them that chance. They also need to make sure that you understand the consequences of any further academic dishonesty and the path to redemption if such a path exists. I assume that it does since you aren’t suspended or expelled as I would have expcted.
if you go be humble and respectful. do not rat anybody else out if they ask about other people and be as brief as you can .
That’s probably not an option, exactly. It’s wishful thinking on your part to say that. You will move on with your life, one way or another, but first you have to get a full understanding of what this incident means.
You are probably exposed to more serious discipline than merely getting an F in the class, possibly including permanent expulsion. The people you will be talking to are important in deciding just how much. If you want to move on with your life, the path goes through that meeting, not around it.
It sounds like you made a serious mistake, and you are going to have to learn how to live with that, and how to learn from it, and how to recover from it. That’s what your goal should be in the meeting: to find out, with specifics, exactly what you have to do to survive this and to attain good standing again.
So the OP does not want to deal with the consequences of his actions. He just want to say “sorry” and hope everyone forgets it.
“I was accused of academic dishonesty.”
well did you cheat or didn’t you?
because if you didn’t, you have a right to defend your innocence and restore your reputation. frankly from the thread title that’s what i thought this was going to be the case.
but if you did cheat then you are being disingenuous with your title thread and it shows you are not really taking full responsibility. you should have written “I am guilty of academic dishonesty” and the fact that you did not, and you just want to dodge the meeting with the dean, just doesn’t show a lot of remorse about it, frankly. you need to go to the meeting in hopes of minimizing the damage, and hopefully you can conjure up at least the appearance of recognizing that what you did was wrong. it will be far worse for you if you blow this off.
however, if you are being falsely accused you need to go to the meeting and defend yourself.
Is it possible that the dean wants to give you another chance? I would definitely go to the meeting, be humble and accountable and hope for the best.
Sorry, but if you cheated, you can’t just send an apology and then pretend the slate is clean. You have to genuinely be sorry and then, most importantly, resolve never to do this again. Breaking old habits (and yes, if you’re in college and cheating, this is not the first time) is hard work and it will help you to be accountable to someone so you don’t slip up.
If, OTOH, you didn’t cheat, then you should show some integrity and advocate for yourself.
In either case, you deserve this meeting. Go and do the right thing, and best of luck to you!
Part of becoming an adult is learning to take responsibility for your actions. You can’t hide behind a parent’s coattails any longer or, in this case, an apology letter. Go and face the music. You will be better for it and you might end up with a better outcome.
Yup, agree, go to the meeting. You will move on with your life after this meeting and probably feel better regardless of the outcome.
hi OP
I am glad you asked for advice because it seems like you need some perspective from those with more experience. I think we are all saying the same thing, basically, but I will add that in a university setting when the dean calls, you answer. This meeting is in no way voluntary, other than in the general human rights sense of course. The dean rules the college. IMO, you must go.
I don’t think the purpose of the meeting is for you to apologize, although you can if you want to. The Dean is going to explain the process you are in, which involves more than just getting an F in a class. Presumably there is an academic integrity process in which you are getting an F for a class for this incident and a file has been created on you. They want to make sure you know what the process is that you have entered and what the next steps will be if there are further complaints. Failing to show up doesn’t put this behind you-- in fact it just adds another entry to your file.
Getting an F may not the end of it. You need to go there to save yourself from more serious consequence. With luck, the situation may improved after the meeting.
“Is it a requirement that I go and meet with them?”
I don’t know. What are the policies on this at your university? If you don’t know, you should go and look it up prior to the meeting with the dean.
“Does it send a bad message to them that I am not appearing?”
Yes. It would be very stupid and foolish for you to not show up. It will basically be an admission of guilt and things will not go well for you even if you did not actually cheat.
“What would you do in my situation?”
Well, it’s hard to give a good recommendation on this since there is a lot that we don’t know about your situation. We don’t know what specifcally you were accused of doing. Or what class it was for. Or if you did or did not do the thing that you are accused of doing. Or what the academic dishonesty/cheating policy & associated discipline policy is at your school. All that being said, you should:
- go to the meeting with the dean & his associate.
- truthfully answer the questions that they ask of you. If you did cheat, own up to it & apologize in person.
- accept whatever disciplinary measures that the dean’s office decides on.
- If you did cheat, don’t ever do it again. If they haven’t expelled you for this infraction, then if you are caught cheating again, you can kiss your educational career at that college good bye.
If you want to continue going to this college, then you absolutely should meet with the dean.
The dean and nobody else in the administration will care about your feeling uncomfortable about meeting with them. Warning: tough love ahead. This is what’s called being an adult. You screwed up and now you have to face the consequences. Being an adult involves having to do things that you don’t like. This is one of those times. If you only learn one thing from this whole experience, it should be that cheating is never worthwhile. You SHOULD end up with the feeling of “OMG, I NEVER want to go through that ever again!”
Yes you should go. Be honest and IF you did anything own up to it. It may seem bad but its not the end of the world. Use the opportunity as the others have said to show your contrition. Its one thing to send a letter of apology but its better to come from you personally. They want to see how you respond to this. Use this opportunity as a new beginning.
Please, for your own sake, go and “face the music.” Your attendance will affect the tune they play.
Chiming in to agree with everyone else. Go.
I am so tempted to say “Don’t go!” just to be a contrarian, but I can’t do it. OP, Go and face the music. Hopefully they will give you enough of a tongue lashing and enough of a scare that you will never, ever do this in future. Academic dishonesty is a slippery slope to dishonesty at work, which can land you in some very tough spots. also, have you told your parents about this? You should. I know the university can’t notify them because you are an adult, but if they are paying (are they?) then they have the right to know.
Cheating is rampant in high schools. College is quite different. Hope others are reading this!