I wish young people would read this thread and see the common theme: substance over all else. Simplicity, focusing on what’s most important, and leaving out all the stress and BS. Fairy tale weddings often end up obscuring what’s most important. Lots of money spent for one day in a life, and in retrospect often regretted.
I recently attended a wedding that was deceptively pricey. It was so fun, a melding of two faiths and families from distant states. Not overtly “fancy,” took place at an outdoor venue with a rustic vibe, but when I found out the price tag, I was in shock.
To be fair, nrdsb4, one of the common themes of these stories is often that it is the PARENTS, not the couple, that want the big weddings.
This mirrors many of the weddings of my friends. The couples all want small-ish weddings but the parents, regardless of whether or not they’re paying, start adding people to guest list because “they can’t NOT be invited!”
It is, but at the same time, I see your parents’ point, @atomom. I fear that if my D ever decides to get married, she’ll elope, and that would break my heart. I don’t care one bit what kind of wedding it is, but I want to be there.
We had a private wedding with just the parents, the witnesses and their spouses the minister and his wife and then dinner at a local restaurant. We went on a 2 week honeymoon and then returned and had a reception with 80 of our friends. I would not do a thing different and loved having the reception after the honeymoon.
We had to choose between having our more recent friends there, or our parents and sibs. When I heard the disappointed tone in my mom’s voice on the phone, I made the decision. H had only his parents and 5 sibs at the wedding. No other relatives or friends of his could make it. The rest of the guests were my relatives (I have a HUGE clan, but many wouldn’t travel in the winter) my parents’ neighbors, and a few local friends of mine from college/high school. Everything was last minute. We got married during the Christmas season-- free decorations in the church and restaurant! H and I picked out the readings and some of the music, put on the clothes, and went through with it.