<p>So glad you’re getting some “you” time… Not so good that it has to be amidst medical nightmares, but at least you’re getting some good recuperation, and hooray for Ziggy. I’m sure he’s glad to have you home, too!</p>
<p>Donna, remember those calories are busy working at healing right now. Your body’s burning them as you regain strength and energy. The weight will come back. </p>
<p>I am also happy to offer whatever poundage you might need… :)</p>
<p>Aren’t pets the BEST medicine ever?</p>
<p>Donna, I hope you are doing well and gaining strength. I check on this thread several times a day to see how you are. Sending good thoughts your way!</p>
<p>I don’t always post but do read avidly and now joyously as you continue to recover. Best wishes for continued healing!</p>
<p>Donna, I just want you to know that I have now purchased a pound of liverwurst two weeks in a row. Even S is eating it.</p>
<p>What makes me happy is to see DonnaL pop up on threads other than this one. All is well … or, at least, heading in the right direction. :)</p>
<p>I haven’t posted anything in a while about how I’m doing, so I thought I’d give an update.</p>
<p>First, I’m sorry that my PM box was full for almost a week – someone had mentioned to me that it was, but I completely forgot to clear space until a day or two ago. Apologies to anyone who tried to send me a PM that bounced.</p>
<p>The most important news is that I’m continuing to get better. Even though I am a little frustrated at how long it’s taking to get my strength and energy back. (I do try to remind myself, when I start feeling that way, that I’ve only been home from the hospital for 10 or 11 days, that I did have major surgery one month ago today – a surgery from which many people I know have taken as long as a couple of months to recover sufficiently to return to work – and that I’m recovering not only from the surgery itself, but from all those intestinal complications that had me in the hospital for weeks.) </p>
<p>I’ve already managed to gain back about half the weight I lost, which is really quite impressive given how much trouble I usually have putting on weight. But I guess having breakfast, lunch, afternoon snack, dinner, and midnight snack every single day has to have some effect! Especially since I’ve actually been eating real meals for lunch (who says I can’t have steak at noon!) instead of what I usually do, which is take 3 minutes to eat a sandwich at my desk at work. (I am making promises to myself to eat better once I do go back to work – no more working until midnight without eating anything at all after lunch, and then having as my “dinner” a bag of pretzels while driving home.) </p>
<p>And believe me, I’ve been enjoying and appreciating every bite. And feeling incredibly grateful for having the opportunity again, which I wished for so much when I was so sick, to be able to eat without pain.</p>
<p>I have been taking walks, but that’s the frustrating part. It’s still very hard for me to feel steady unless I use a cane. And as recently as today, spending 15 minutes walking three times around the circular driveway, followed by half an hour sitting on a bench, tired me out so much that I had to take a 2-hour nap as soon as I got upstairs. I also discovered, somewhat to my dismay, that if I squat down to pick something up, my legs still aren’t strong enough to permit me to stand up without holding onto something. Oh well; that’ll come.</p>
<p>I have started driving; I drove into the City for a doctor’s appointment on Monday (I’m going back tomorrow for a followup), and went to the supermarket today. (And to the nearest Barnes & Noble, because I always have to have the security blanket of knowing that I have some new books to read. I think I’ve been reading about one book every day or two – nothing too demanding!)</p>
<p>From how tired those trips made me, and from how tired I still am in general, I am quite certain that I am not even close to ready for a daily commute, let alone ready to sit at my desk working all day. Certainly not by next Monday, August 3, which was my original target date for returning to work when I went off to have the surgery (a date based on the assumption that everything would go smoothly)! But I’ve explained all of that to the people at my office, and told them that I do hope to be able to start working at home next week, for at least a few hours a day. And then maybe start coming in the following week if I feel well enough. (Naturally, given the economy and how it’s affected my firm, and the fact that salaries were already cut by 15% earlier this year, part of me worries that I’m <em>not</em> being heavily pressured to come back right away. As in, “oh my God, what if they decide they don’t really need me at all anymore?!” But I do make an effort not to think like that too much; it’s not exactly good for my morale. And I did spend an hour or so on Friday emailing with someone about how to proceed on one case; so at least I haven’t been completely forgotten!)</p>
<p>So, all in all, the recovery from my little gastroenterological crisis is really going well. (My g.i. doctor hopes to be able to taper me off the prednisone completely in about two weeks, and then allow me to switch back to the other cortisone-derived drug I’ve been taking the last few years, which doesn’t carry nearly as much risk of adverse systemic side-effects as prednisone does. I’ve also been taking huge doses of both flagyl and cipro for the last three weeks, first by iv and afterwards by mouth, and I hope to be able to stop the flagyl in another couple of weeks, too.)</p>
<p>In terms of recovery from the surgery itself, I haven’t been so sure, since I’ve really had nothing to compare it to or any way of knowing whether everything is as it should be. There’s still a lot of swelling and bruising , but I think that’s to be expected. It can take as long as a year for all the swelling to go down completely, from what I understand. But I admit that I did kind of have a panic attack on Sunday night, and think that something had gone very, very wrong, when a blood clot that had covered one particular area ever since the surgery finally came off, and I couldn’t see anything underneath it but an open wound with broken stitches in it, that obviously hadn’t healed properly. (Don’t worry; I’m not going to get any more graphic or specific than that!)</p>
<p>So I was very happy that I had an appointment on Monday with someone with a lot of experience with women who’ve recently had the same kind of surgery I did; she works at Callen-Lorde, the same medical center as my primary care physician, who referred me to her. I thought originally that she was a gynecologist; she’s actually a certified nurse midwife. Which doesn’t bother me in the least, because as it turns out, I think she’s fantastic. Not only is she very obviously expert at what she does, but she also has to be one of the nicest, most empathetic medical practitioners I’ve ever encountered in my life. (And I’ve encountered a lot of them; believe me!) She sat there and listened carefully to my whole tale of woe, and seemed to understand everything, and never acted for one second like I was taking up her valuable time, and was extremely gentle when she examined me, and explained every single thing she was doing. (I think there was actually a thread recently asking for people’s opinions about nurse practitioners – all I can say is, this one impressed me very favorably!)</p>
<p>Anyway, she reassured me that what went wrong isn’t irreparable. Apparently, the presence of that blood clot for the last four weeks prevented the area from fusing together properly. She didn’t really understand why the surgeon didn’t take steps to remove it early on, to allow the area to heal like it was supposed to. Eventually, maybe in a few months, once I’m more recovered in general, I’ll probably need to find a doctor who can stitch everything together so it’s all in one piece. The nurse said she’s going to try to find out if there’s someone in NYC who’d be able to do it – she thinks it would be a simple outpatient procedure, and is pretty sure we can find someone – because I made very clear that I’m not going back to Montreal for anything, ever, and that although I’d go to Philadelphia if I had to, I’d really rather just get it done here if possible. </p>
<p>The other little problem I seem to have is that a number of places in the area of the surgery (including the place that didn’t heal properly) are infected. Apparently, all that cipro and flagyl I’ve been getting both intravenously and orally for the last few weeks has been good for my intestines, but does nothing for skin infections! Who knew? So the nurse prescribed some Keflex, which she hopes will clear the infection up soon. I’ll go see her again tomorrow, because she wanted to wait to do an internal exam until the antibiotics have had a chance to work a little.</p>
<p>I said nothing goes completely smoothly with me and medical issues, didn’t I? (And I’ll bet people thought I was exaggerating when I first mentioned it!)</p>
<p>The only other thing I wanted to be sure to mention is how sweet and wonderful James has continued to be through all of this, since his return to Chicago. He’s been calling me at least every other day, sometimes every day, just to see how I’m doing, and make sure I’m OK, and keep me company on the phone for a while. He even remembered that I had a doctor’s appointment on Monday morning, and called me that afternoon to see how I was. What makes me even happier, though, is that he seems to be having a really good summer out there, and enjoying his classes, and working hard, and seeing friends, and getting some experience learning what it’s like to share an apartment with two other guys and be responsible for cooking and cleaning and doing everything else for himself. With no dishwasher! No air conditioner! No washer and dryer in the building, so he has to use a laundromat down the street! Somehow, the same boy who was still always forgetting to tie his shoes when I sent him off to college less than a year ago, and always seemed to lose everything that wasn’t attached to him and some things that were, is now all grown up and thriving. I’m very proud. He’s still trying to find some paid work (nothing’s panned out yet), but in the meantime he’s been volunteering at a thrift shop run by the Howard Brown Health Center (which is basically Chicago’s equivalent of Callen-Lorde, specializing in LGBT health care in general, as well as HIV/AIDS care). He says he finds organizing the clothing, and being there in general, to be very soothing.</p>
<p>Most of all, what makes me happy – at least as happy as I am for myself that I got better – is knowing how relieved he is that I’m OK. As I’ve written before in this thread, perhaps the hardest part of all of this for me, when things seemed so bad, was to see James so devastated, and so worried, but not feel strong enough (or optimistic enough) to be able to be truly reassuring. I so, so didn’t want him to have to go through what I went through (never mind the lifelong consequences thereafter) when I was less than a year older than he is now: the six weeks I spent in the summer of 1975 watching my mother die as a result of the injuries she suffered when we were in that car accident while she was driving me home from New Haven at the end of my third and last year at Yale. All that shock, followed by hope, followed by growing despair when I started to understand that she wasn’t going to make it. In some ways, I still haven’t gotten over it, and probably never will. So I really did know exactly what James was feeling during all this, and it made me as sad to know that as anything I’ve ever known. I simply couldn’t bear the idea of my own beloved child having to deal with something like that at his age.</p>
<p>And I’m very glad he didn’t. And won’t, if I can help it!</p>
<p>Thanks again, so much, to all of you, for the love and support you showed me during all of this. There are truly some wonderful people in this world.</p>
<p>Love to all,</p>
<p>Donna</p>
<p>Thank you, Donna, for continuing to post these posts. It is so good to hear that your overall trajectory is toward rapidly improving health. You sound so good, and well—content, overall. And that makes me very happy. You are one of the most bravely open people on CC, exposing your vulnerabilities in ways that are very touching and inspiring of feelings nothing short of love. I will continue to keep your recovery in my prayers. And I’m so glad to hear that James is maturing and thriving. Such a good son! I can understand why you’re so proud of him:)</p>
<p>First, I have to tell you that when I was a kid, I had a cat named Ziggy. Cool name for a cat. </p>
<p>Second, Nurse Practitioners can be absolutely wonderful. I adored the one I had who took care of my pregnancy. She was caring, knowledgable and way nicer than my OB. Gosh, I miss her!</p>
<p>You have been through the wringer. I can’t imagine what your day is like, but I am glad that you are slowly improving each day. (It may be 3 steps forward, and 2 back, but it is progress.)</p>
<p>Donna,</p>
<p>I was so happy to read your update. It sounds as though you are doing very well physically and emotionally. Perfect? No. But you just underwent MAJOR surgery (with a significant complication) and there’s rarely a smooth road after that. You’re a strong woman and you’ll get back to “normal” in due course. In the meantime, be a patient patient!</p>
<p>I’m also happy to hear James is doing so well. Isn’t it wonderful to watch our children mature in front of our eyes? </p>
<p>Take care of yourself and please continue your updates. There are a LOT of people here who truly care about you.</p>
<p>Donna, even minor surgery takes time to recover from. I’ve had two surgeries in two years for my bone cancer–yes, it’s gone–the first was less of a big deal than yours, and the second was even less of a big deal–and it’s now six months from the last surgery… and finally I feel good. </p>
<p>I assume you are taking vitamins, but if you’re not, start. Take the stress-B type in addition to a regular multivitamin, and take enough B vitamins (not the others) to make sure your pee is brilliant yellow, because that means you’re taking too much and the excess is getting spilled into your urine. For two months after my surgery, that was a triple dose–and now I just need the B vitamins every other day for that to happen. </p>
<p>I also found that protein powder added to my morning smoothie helped the recovery go better. I still notice on the days that I try to skip.</p>
<p>Donna- I am so glad to hear that you are steadily improving and regaining strength. I’m glad that your np is on top of things regarding the clot complication- she will come through for you to get that attended to at the proper time.</p>
<p>What a relief for you that James is doing well in Chicago and that he is relieved about your progress. And what a relief for him!. I didn’t know about your mother’s death as a result of an accident, but I can surely see how reliving that stress during your own stressful situation really added pain to your situation. I am so sorry about your mom-even though it was many years ago, there are events we are all bound to relive because they were so wrenching the first time around. I know that I relive the circumstances and surrounding issues of my brother’s death whenever I am confronted with a situation that reminds me of mortality. </p>
<p>Just wanted to say that I’m happy you are progressing and that you and James are still in my prayers. I just started a new job in the Church so I get a lot of praying time. Take care and keep in touch. </p>
<p>Love, Pipmom</p>
<p>Donna, thank you for posting an update. It will get better, and I’m so happy you found a NP who is so thorough, compassionate and knowledgeable. I second dmd’s suggestion of vitamins, just double-check with your doctors what and how much is OK for you to take.</p>
<p>I love CNMs and I’m so glad that you have found such a good one. </p>
<p>Your loving words about your son brought tears to my eyes. We love our boys, don’t we? I’m so thankful that you and James are both able to rest easier these days.</p>
<p>Donna,</p>
<p>Thanks for the great up-date. You know we’re all wishing you nothing but the speediest physical recovery–your mind and spirit seem in good order already. 
</p>
<p>It’s great that you’re gaining much-needed weight. If you want pointers on how to do this quickly and efficiently, just let me know and I’ll be glad to help. Right now, I’m working diligently on doubling my size from my wedding day 23 years ago, and doing a right fine job of it. :(</p>
<p>As you already seem to know, you hit a grand slam home-run with your son. Wow, what fine young man you’ve raised!</p>
<p>Best wishes!</p>
<p>“Best wishes?” Novelisto, you’re a writer. I expect you to wax long and philosophical every time you put cyber pen to cyber paper. ;)</p>
<p>Donna, ask your primary care physician if you should be eating yogurt, considering all the antibiotics you’re on. You don’t want the drugs to kill off all the good intestinal bacteria. I’m thinking of “Activia” and the others with live cultures. (I’m not keen on the concept of eating anything live, but apparently it helps.)</p>
<p>I think working an hour or so a day would be a great idea. How nice that a colleague needed you! Physically, you can do it from home; it will get you to focus on things outside of your own surroundings, and get you back in the swing sooner. </p>
<p>My advice – which you can certainly ignore! – is to walk a little bit more every day. Assuming everything is healing correctly now, you need to push yourself a tiny bit in order to regain your stamina.</p>
<p>Donna, I love your updates, especially since they are now so promising.</p>
<p>Also, I just want to second your comments about Callen-Lorde and the wonderful nurse practitioners there (I have a feeling we’ve both been to the same one). I went there on the recommendation of a friend several years ago and was so impressed by the place that I have been donating to them every year.</p>
<p>Donna Glad to hear of your progress. May I recommend Rachel Cusk’s “The Last Supper: A Summer in Italy”, should you ever run out of book ideas.</p>