I’m still needed; yesterday, offering assistance and reassurance and hope to D1 during the hour that she and her friend thought the friend’s car (containing many of D1’s possessions) had been stolen; today, commiserating with D2 who just found out that her roommate hasn’t been paying the Internet bill.
Oh darn! That’s a tough way to be needed.
I started to cry when D1 told me they’d figured out the car had been towed and that they had located it.
She has been doing extremely well, been to office hours, been to available study sessions, was ready for these finals based on what had been taught in class and all of the assignments. Both tests are finals, and they both had material on them that she had never seen before, wasn’t on any kind of extension activity recommended on the syllabus. Nothing she could have done to prepare, except for maybe getting lucky randomly self-studying chapters they didn’t get to???
Oh well, if it was unfair, it was unfair to everyone in the class. She absolutely loves to learn, but she also has a history of getting the reward of good grades for her learning which is important to her. But like all of us, she has to pull up those big girl panties and move on. So hard to see her crying and be 7000+ miles away though.
She’ll be on her break and going to visit our best friends in Maine, so she will get away for a few days and enjoy her first ever New England fall foliage and sub 40 degree temperatures. Hope she brings a jacket and a hat.
^^One thing I think that happens in college vs. high school. In high school, the routine is more “read these pages, do this work, this will be on the test” - kids follow that pattern and feel pretty prepared. In college, the prof might say “I will lecture in class, you should/could read sections of your book (not in a “required” way) and test? Well, just be prepared for it” - in other words, kids aren’t drilled EXACTLY what/how/how much to study and learn prior to the test. They may or may not do the reading or check out the other resources mentioned by the prof. It’s just not as cut and dry as high school test drilling. So as freshmen, that can throw them off. Especially those who were test whizzes in high school.
Also sometimes, profs just randomly test !!! Which is frustrating.
@abasket, this is so true. Son just took a biology exam as well. He said he studied hard for it but still fears he missed too many of the questions to have done well on it. I think he is still in high school mode where you’re given material to study and then tested on it. College may ask more theoretical questions and that’s the way he’ll have to retrain himself to think. Yeap, first semester freshman year has been a culture shock but good for learning the difference between high school and college.
Well, what’s done is done. She is enjoying navigating from taxi, to train, to bus to get to our friends house today. First time doing this kind of trip on her own in the US. So onto another new learning experience.
She is driven and she is resilient.
@rosered55 ,
Hahahaha!!! #442 happened to me once! I was so certain that my car was stolen and I became the victim of a crime for the first time in my life! I started to panick and hyperventilate when a nice person in the neighborhood came out and told me that the towing truck took away my car.
I was not the victim of a crime but the offender of the traffic law… I thanked the person but it sure was embarrassing!!
Hi all! I just was checking back in here and re-read my post from a month ago (I was very down in the dumps) and all of your kind responses to me at that time. I so appreciate each and every one of you! Things here have gotten a bit better (though I still have my sad jags here and there). We have been to parents weekends and seeing the kids feeling happy and secure in their new university homes definitely helped. Slowly but surely!!! I still feel jealous of some of my friends who have zipped thru this transition seeming truly happy about it… but I think my slow, still sad approach to this change may be more of a norm than I realized. Hugs and thanks to all of you for being a great support community!!
My husband and I had a really hard time this week. Daughter was on break and visiting our best friends in Maine for a few days of hiking in the foliage. Coincidentally our friends were having internet and phone issues. Our daughter has a basic cell phone plan with very little data, but has been relying on WiFi to communicate with us. So between wishing she was with us during her break from school, wishing we were in New England to enjoy the crisp cold and beautiful scenery with her (because they were firsts for her), wishing we were also with our friends in Maine, and not being able to communicate with her as much as we have been able to while she is at school, we had a few really rough days. It does make me appreciate how much she has been trying to stay in touch with us, and my heart goes out to parents who want to hear more from their kids but don’t once they leave for school.
Glad you are feeling a bit better @kidsrexpensive.
On a really positive note, my daughter’s first term grades turned out great, despite her feeling that she did poorly on the finals.
My daughter has been leaving her school quite a bit on weekends. She had bought concert tickets for her now ex-bf . She instead used them along with her best friend , but had to travel from Baltimore to Philadelphia. She did the same trip again because same friend also had concert tickets, then she took the train to New Brunswick to visit friends at Rutgers. Now she wants to come home ( she has also been here a few times ) because one of her friends has a birthday. This will be a short trip though because she has a date on Sunday….argh ! I can’t keep up with her !!
It’s hard for me to tell her to stay at her school because she has been so sad over her break-up .
I find myself feeling pangs of sadness when I pass her high school in the afternoon and seeing the various sports practices.
Was your daughter the one who was not excited about school because of the boyfriend?! Or am I mixed up? If so, may I ask who broke up with who?
Is she funding all these trips or are you ok with funding them? That’s a lot of traveling!
Got to see my girl’s face on Skype early this morning (her afternoon) and it was great! She is back at her school and going to enjoy a couple days with her quad to herself until her roommates start returning. The trip to Maine was a success.
My mother has worked out some great Thanksgiving plans for my daughter including transportation so that is taken care of, yeah Mom! (Guess she really wanted my daughter at her house which is awesome). It will be my daughter’s first stateside Thanksgiving and the first at her grandmother’s house ever. So many firsts.
@abasket , she broke up with him , but she did it because he was just wasn’t communicating with her, pretty much blowing her off. She still has feelings for him , unfortunately. As far as the trips, she has paid for the Megabus and trains herself , and it hasn’t been much money . She has saved all of her paychecks since she began working so it isn’t that big an expense. We have picked her up and driven her back twice ( three times by this weekend )
She asked me today if she can take a trip with her school in February and I said yes , mainly because I just want her to bond with students at her own school
^^That sounds excellent! Sounds like she really enjoys getting out and seeing other places - that’s great!
Hey everyone, the first semester is almost over and we all survived! Happy Holidays!
I’ve been missing the kids more than usual this week while setting up the tree and listening to Christmas music. I was doing pretty good up until this point and now a week and a half can’t come too soon.
I’m doing fantastic because my D came home yesterday from study abroad and today we went to see my S and had lunch (he still has a couple more weeks before he can come home). So happy to have my family together again, if only for a couple hours.
Yes, I have 12 days before she flies in, my husband and I can hardly wait!
S is in London this year. He will be home in 6 days. Can’t wait!