I'm Jesus.

Chance Me / Match Me
1

<p>So…what are my chances at Harvard? I would love to attend the highest-ranked ministry school (it’s my dream!), but I don’t know, it’s a pretty high reach. :/</p>

<p>I have a 3.8UW GPA and a 4.3W. My test scores are so-so, okay, like a 30 on the ACT and a 1930 on the SAT. My calculator malfunctioned, and I didn’t want to disturb anyone’s peace. </p>

<p>I need to apply for financial aid, as I give away all of my money for alms. :slight_smile: It’s kind of stupid, but I can’t help it–it’s my nature. It wouldn’t affect me if I lived in America, but I’m an international student! I know it dashes my chances. </p>

<p>My extracurriculars are pretty good, I would say! I founded my own religion, gave billions salvations…will colleges be impressed? Can I write a well-structured essay around this? What should I say? I also cure leprosy and turn water into wine. </p>

<p>My dad is VERY influential, I might add, no one seems to want to mess with him.</p>

<p><a href=“http://talk.collegeconfidential.com/what-my-chances/1052041-chance-me.html[/url]--the”>http://talk.collegeconfidential.com/what-my-chances/1052041-chance-me.html--the&lt;/a&gt; girl who posted this, no blasphemy, this is a complete joke</p>

2

<p>Sorry Jesus, but being international will hurt your chances…</p>

3

<p>Are you sure? :frowning: I can offer colleges salvation.</p>

<p>Oh, I know a good hook! I can bless their hockey team, give them a Disney miracle. :)</p>

4

<p>Haha you could bless they’re lacrosse team as well, talk to the main minister and see if he will recruit you xD</p>

5

<p>Whatevs, I’ll just send them some plagues?</p>