I'm so sad...dog story

Parent Cafe
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<p>We (D & I) rescued a dog 5 years ago when my mom was dying of brain cancer. It was a perfect match in every way. The next year D moved to college, and dog & I became even closer. </p>

<p>Last Tuesday the sweet boy got very ill (actually began 2 days before) and became paralyzed on one side of his face. He began choking on his tongue. Took him to the vet, and had the sad task of putting him down. I have cried so hard over the loss. </p>

<p>I haven’t told D yet as she is very (VERY) sensitive, and takes everything so very hard. Thankfully she’s coming home tomorrow for her 2 week summer visit (she lives in NYC), and I have the terrible task of breaking the news to her. But at least it will be in person, and we can mourn together. And I can hug her tight. What a lousy task. </p>

<p>What is it about these animals that burrow so very deep into our hearts and souls?</p>

<p>Sigh…</p>

2

<p>Sorry. {{{{hugs}}}}</p>

3

<p>:( thats so sad, did you at least find out what happened to cause this?</p>

<p>my suggestioin is to tell her as soon as possible, the longer you wait the more it will sting.</p>

4

<p>I’m so sorry for your loss.

Unconditional love.</p>

5

<p>I am sorry for your loss.
We said goodbye to our much loved lab this past weekend. She was a much older dog, she turned 16 in June, but she had been doing fairly well until just a few days ago.
I was already scheduled to go out of town for a short trip & I pushed it back, a little, but today was the first full day I have been home and her things are not all put away, and I keep thinking I need to check on her or give her , her medicine or get dressed so I can take her outside.
:frowning:
My youngest, who was here with her dad, has no memories from before we had her. She was a huge part of all our lives & it is very hard- but sharing stories really helps & I actually am a little relieved that it didn’t drag out.</p>

<p>Having some sort of ritual to say good bye helps I think. we are going to take a camping trip ( one of her favorite things) to plan one soon.</p>

<p>Hugs to you and your D</p>

6

<p>Oh I’m so sorry. When DD’s beloved cat died just a couple of weeks after she left for college, we gave her a call, and we all cried together. That was the saddest conference call I’ve ever had.</p>

<p>To answer the question at the end of your post, I do not remember the exact quote, but I think it goes like this, “You become responsible for what you’ve tamed…”</p>

<p>Big hugs to you.</p>

7

<p>RIP and {{{{{{{{{{{{{HUGS}}}}}}}}}}}}</p>

8

<p>sorry for your loss.</p>

9

<p>I feel for you. We just lost our beloved dog two weeks ago right before the family vacation that he loved to go on. I still look for him when I come downstairs in the morning. And while it may not be right for you, a new puppy has helped us. No time to grieve when chasing a wild fur ball around.</p>

10

<p>How sad. The bright side is you and your D provided him home for his last 5 years. In return, he comforted you. I am sure he was happy. Both you and the dog were happier together even if it didn’t last forever.</p>

11

<p>What a joyful 5 years that little rescue dog must have had: getting a home to call his own and having a family to love! </p>

<p>Sorry for your loss.</p>

12

<p>"just"amom I’m so sorry for your loss. Our pets become such a big and important part of our lives. </p>

<p>We lost our 16-year-old dog a week before emeraldkity’s. It was very hard but she was clearly suffering. The evening after she died, we put roses from the garden in a small vase, lit a candle, and sat at the kitchen table after dinner and talked for a long time about our favorite memories of her. This was a dog that DS1 had picked at the Humane Society when he was in first grade, and DS2 was in kindergarten. Our memories expanded to include the other dog and the cat, and by the end of the conversation we were all smiling.</p>

<p>I’m glad that the boys were both home to say goodbye, as I was dreading having to call them at school to pass on this kind of news.</p>

<p>The “tame” quote is from The Little Prince (Antoine de Saint-Exupery).</p>

<p>

</p>

13

<p>We had a rescue dog who died last year. Our groomer said the sweetest thing, which I will pass along to you: By giving him a loving home, you made it possible for him to fulfill his role here on earth–taking care of his human “pack.” We mourned (and in some ways we still mourn), but he was a bright spot in our lives.</p>

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<p>The house seems really empty. We have had a pet for the past 27 years, when our cat arrived a few weeks after we moved in and said " I’m here"!</p>

<p>But it will give me a chance to get rid of this old carpet, which has seen better days.</p>

<p>My H recommends " The Art of Racing in the Rain", by Garth Stein to help with the loss of a dog. ( It is told from the dogs perspective)</p>

15

<p>Oh EK and Justamom… I’m sorry to hear about your dogs. Giving a dog a long and happy life (or even a short and happy life) is no small commitment. It’s so hard when they leave us.</p>

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<p>When my beloved pug died a few years back it was heartbreaking. After about three weeks, I started looking to buy new puppy (urged by my husband…I would cry looking at the dog dishes, yet could not put them away) and I was blessed with my new pug puppy. I didn’t think they could get any sweeter, but she is. My mood changed right away because instead of sadness in my heart, a new love was born. I still think of my beautiful black pug, but it is with happiness and fondness instead of sadness and grief.</p>

17

<p>I want another black labrador- but our doggie was 60-70 lbs when she was healthy ( old style bred for hunting) and if we had another dog who lasted 15+ years, I know there isn’t any way I could get an old dog that size in and out of my Jeep when I am 67yrs old :o</p>

<p>Also- she was SO MUCH ENERGY, when she was younger.
She didn’t start to settle down till she was about 5, she required daily trips to park, hikes, and * throwing of the ball* for hours.
Without kids at home to take some of that duty, I really wouldn’t have any time to do anything else!</p>

<p>I think she really would have loved being a hunting dog- that was what she was bred for- but she also liked living in a city neighborhood, where she got to know lots of people. Already many are coming up to me and sharing their stories, we have lived here so long with her, that she knew everyone.</p>

<p>But in the back of my head- I am thinking about two dogs- but a little smaller.
Still, I think it is going to be a while before we are ready.</p>

<p>I am thinking of training helper dogs before that though- I am going to look into it.</p>

18

<p>Thanks everyone for the kind words & the shared stories.</p>

<p>I not only read The Art of Racing in the Rain, I bought copies for everyone I know. What a great book.</p>

<p>Our boy had never lived in a home, and when we rescued him he had been living in a car. He was so skinny and filled with “nervous” dandruff. He would literally have to touch my body all the time for the first year he was with us. If I went to another room, his body would be pressed against my leg as I walked. He was skittish and terribly afraid of other dogs. So much so that I had to walk him at night. At the end he was robust, muscular, and would spoon in the bed all night long. </p>

<p>A cute story…after awhile (of being with us) he began wanting to take care of and “protect” me. One night as we walked, we approached a lawn that had a curled up hose on it. The boy crouched way low, and slunk super slowly and then POUNCED right on that hose! As soon as he discovered it was an inanimate object he stood up proud, shook a wee bit, looked up at me and gave me the “you’re so welcome…I would protect you any time” look. I laughed so hard I think I embarrassed him.</p>

<p>Someone asked if we knew what caused his paralysis, not really. Without extensive and expensive testing, which I wasn’t willing to do (and the vet said, “it simply postpones the inevitable”).</p>

<p>The boy was around 9 or 10 (he was around 4 or 5 when he came to us), and the vet said it could have been anything from an inner ear infection, a neck injury, or even cancer. </p>

<p>I’m doing better, but the task of breaking the news to my D is what’s making me anxious. </p>

<p>Part of me thinks, get another dog, and part of me wants to wait and see what life without one will be like. It’ll be interesting to see which side of me “wins”.</p>

<p>I love reading everyone’s stories.</p>

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<p>My kids don’t do well with transitions- and I was trying to keep both of them updated the past year on our doggies condition. My oldest liked to be kept informed, but my youngest I think felt that stress making.</p>

<p>But if my D was coming home and hadn’t a clue, I probably would think about writing something down about how much I missed her when she was gone/was happy she was home, but then that I needed to tell her something that was hard, when she was ready- that she then could read in private and when she came out, she might be a little prepared.</p>

<p>It is hard- but our kids have been through a lot, and the little things help them handle the big things</p>

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<p>When I pick her up at the airport (just a few miles from home) I will just tell her I have “sad news”. We have had a long-standing family rule (since I was little) - no bad news while any of us are traveling unless it involves a parent in dire health. She’ll understand why I didn’t say anything, but it will be shocking and extremely sad. She’s had her own stress the last 10 days as her lease is nearly up and she’s been working on securing a new place before her trip as school starts 5 days after she gets back. Just so much going on.</p>