<p>I know that kids who are waitlisted are just as smart and capable as those who are admitted, but if this is the case, why do some kids find themselves floating in a pool of acceptances while others drown in a sea of waitlists? If the waitlisted kids are just as good but don't play the right instrument or sport for that year, why isn't it spread more evenly? Does every school have a shortage of saxophonists at the same time? It's mind-boggling. </p>

<p>P.S. Thanks to everyone for your encouraging posts and messages. I love you all. :)</p>

<p>I feel your pain and i’m going to paint with a broad brush here, but the reality comes down to $$$ and everyone knows that. The major topic of conversation at the recent NAIS convention was a seminar on “how to attract more FP students”.(you can google it)…most schools (outside HADES to some extent) are going through a rigorous exercise to figure out how to attract the FP family. Unfortunately, my opinion is that it will become increasingly more difficult for the middle to lower income great students to get a fair look at most of these schools. I think the continuing trend will be to look for FP families including URM families outside the US. Again, just my opinion and i know there are exceptions, etc…this is just a 30,000 foot view/opinion. The hope for “everyone else” is that the FP families continue to beat down the doors of the top schools and the other schools realize that hanging their hat on FP families is not the right strategy b/c they can’t compete in that space consistently.</p>

<p>I think a big factor is money. If you are a “qualified applicant” and you can pay in full, the school will want to accept you more than if you need financial aid. It really stinks. My family always says that a waitlist to us (because we would need about 80% FA) would have been an acceptance if only we could pay in full. Think about the comparison. Two equally qualified candidates; one can pay in full, one needs a lot of FA. Who will they take? The full pay candidate. Kids who have a lot of acceptances probably can pay in full or almost in full. Either that or they’re like a crazy well rounded superstar. Kids with lots of waitlists probably needed FA. They are qualified, but the school only has so much aid to give out. It’s way more competitive when you need money.</p>

<p>Money factors for sure. But I also wish BSs would reevaluate their policies for waitlisting students. As in, stop using the waitlist as a kinder, gentler way of rejecting students. </p>

<p>I see quite a number of international applicants getting FA or part FA. Really do not know how BSs can verify overseas assets and income, or the lack of it, unless the applicants are US citizen or permanent residents filing US tax returns</p>

<p>Of course, all these schools DO give out a lot of FA. But the numbers you don’t see, Stargirl, is what the admit rates are for those applying for FA and those who are FP. It’s much much more competitive-- even, as has been discussed on these boards, at very generous schools. The acceptance/decisions lists here on CC don’t list who applied for FA and who didn’t but, if they did, that might make you feel a little better. All those wait lists you are on showed you ARE qualified. I know that doesn’t get you in. I’m still hoping you hear good news off a wait list, or can still try again next year. Just reading your posts, it’s pretty clear you’ll turn out ok whatever you do for high school, but I hope some BS AO realizes how much you’ll really treasure a BS experience and really take full advantage of it. That IS part of what they want-- kids who will really take advantage of their time there. I hope they see that about you.</p>

<p>I agree it is the ability to pay. If you look at the decision and stats thread the majority of those accepted who posted their stats were full pay. </p>

<p>@stargirl3: If a waitlist doesn’t come through, I hope you won’t focus so much on the missed opportunity of BS that you don’t fully embrace your new high school. You will shine wherever you go. And you can be happy and fulfilled wherever you go; please try to keep yourself open to that possibility.</p>

<p>@Fatchester it is not like that. As an international student I may say that it was extremely hard to fill on the PFS, as we dont have those forms in here. But we also have forms you know… Parents annual wages, family’s assets, students assets, expenses, school expenses for other kid, taxes, health care, they even ask about all the properties owned and stuff, cars, home, their values… etc etc… and all the documents about parents wages, house, assets and all those things were official, signed,translated and notarized(in case you were wondering how do the schools verify if they are true, itd be illegal to send false docs)… it was difficult for us as a process but i think it was pretty clear. </p>

<p>RC<I am having some other countries in mind, where “unofficial” can easily be turned into “official”, and assets are so easily hidden. In your case, i am sure everything was genuine and truthful. </p>

<p>@stargirl3 I truly believe that if most of the kids who are WL and needing FA didn’t need the FA…the results would be very different. Our HS advisor was told straight from the schools themselves that they loved my daughter but couldn’t afford to offer what we needed in FA. :(( </p>

<p>My heart breaks for the children who were wait listed due to FA.I know because I have been there. It is extremely painful but it is not the end of the world. My husband and I both worked and paid our way through college and spent many years afterwards paying off student loans. It took me over 6 years to finish college because I had to withdraw three times to work full-time in order to save enough money for tuition. You can still be successful even if you do not end up going to boarding school. I am glad that Stargirl at least has a good local option for next year. </p>

<p>It truly does suck being too rich to get much FA but too poor to pay everything. It’s a sad situation that a honestly keep a lot of very qualified student out of these great schools. It seems like only the rich and poor can get into these schools, and that is probably really frustrating for lot of kids. Luckily I’m on the poorer end of things, also I have a minority status to my advantage, but that really shouldn’t be what helped me get into any schools, you know? It’s politics, and it truly sucks and I hope that you all having these issues have better luck next year. Also try to pick up some cool ECs and start studying for the SSAT now. Get prepared so you’ll stand out and get not only an acceptance but FA from the school of you’re dreams.
Good luck! (Sorry for any typos)</p>

<p>I was thinking money too… thanks! :)</p>

<p>I wasn’t asking this trying to dwell on the reasons I didn’t get good news, I’m just genuinely curious. </p>


<p>You are well liked in this community. People who have read your postings get to like you. It is a great advantage/merit. You already possess very important thing in life. Charisma. Be proud of yourself. As much as I hope for the best results from the WL, I am confident that you will lead a great life regardless. </p>

<p>People learn more from bitter experiences than sweet. This will only make you a stronger, resilient person. </p>

<p>@stargirl, I grieve for your disappointment. If boarding school admissions were determined entirely on the basis of merit, then you would be at the top of the list of deserving candidates. But the unfortunate reality is that these schools, although they are non-profits, are BUSINESSES.</p>

<p>Boarding school is a a discretionary product. It is a premium product that is VERY expensive to produce. At the end of the day, someone has to pay the school’s bills. </p>

<p>If you have the determination to try yet again next year, perhaps your chances will be enhanced by the fact that u will be needing one year less of full FA. </p>

<p>Good luck in all your endeavors. I am a big fan of yours!</p>

<p>A timely article was in the NYT this past Saturday about Tabor’s financial aid award process in particular.</p>

<p><a href=“For Boarding Schools, an Evolving Financial Aid Philosophy - The New York Times”>;/a&gt;&lt;/p&gt;

<p>I think $ is one factor but then I think of the very generous financial aid packages that all these schools award to many, many students. Obviously, the well does run dry at some point, and given the fact that boarding school applications are up substantially, then you do have a situation where some just can not afford to attend. But then there are many other factors such as athletic ability, geographical and ethnic diversity and musical or other “special” talents that might tip the scale. </p>

<p>StarGirl … having two daughters through this process, here’s my take:</p>

<p>Wait lists … note this is top of my head and in no way official, but we’ve seen 2 types. </p>

<li><p>First, there are the FA wait list students. There just isn’t enough money to go around as many have pointed out. D1 was 99% SSAT, 3 sport captain, and had a strong application; but she needed 80% FA. She got mostly wait lists. There was a factor of ‘fit’ that did factor in the one school where she was accepted. The schools had a certain type that they were looking for. I think that was stronger than the ‘hook’ that some mention; though my girls are mostly just well rounded student-athletes.</p></li>
<li><p>Second, there are the ‘lets not waste a spot’ wait lists. There are some schools that D2 was qualified for, but that wait listed her. They believed that she would get into better schools, and from what they’ve told us, didn’t want to hold a spot or tie up FA on her. Indeed, that’s what happened.</p></li>

<p>One more thought … the schools that my daughters did get into were clearly the schools where we showed a lot of interest. We picked a few schools and went to their open houses, games, met the coaches, and reached out to them through friends and teachers. Those schools are the ones that my girls got into. That carried weight probably out of proportion to their applications. </p>

<p>At this point, for those who are wait listed at all schools, I’d pick a school that is a good fit and might have wait listed you thinking that you’d be accepted to a top school. Then i’d find ways to convey your interest with class (no stalking) through letters, friends, teachers and current students. Or, if you’re accepted someplace acceptable, I’d ‘love the school that loves you’, but play out the approach to your top choice until the end only if there’s a significant attractiveness to your top school. In fact, D1 got off of the wait list into a top school on April 9th a few years back using that strategy. But she was fully ready to love the school that accepted her … knowing that was the most likely outcome.</p>

<p>That’s what I know … StarGirl bless you and know that another door will open for you, somehow; you’ve got heart.</p>