I too find the Amherst comment off-putting. I don’t mind when Adcoms truthfully say that they can fill their entire first year class with Vals and Sals 40 times over and are looking for something more that just high-stats kids.
But to tell a roomful of prospective students that they don’t belong at their school is just rude (however statistically true it may be).
How did “you probably won’t get in” morph into “you don’t belong here”?
This goes back a decade, and maybe they’ve dialed it down a bit since then, but we had an insufferably snotty adcom during a Duke info session. Sure, they had a daunting admit rate even then, but their yield wasn’t in Harvard/Stanford territory. I lost track of the times we were reminded that probably no one here today would be accepted. A friend who had the same adcom wanted to stand up and say “you know, more than half the people who get in are going to turn you down,” and stalk out. (She didn’t.)
Sure enough, my d was waitlisted, not accepted. But she did get to turn them down for law school, which must have felt good. 
I’ve been to Amherst’s info session twice in the last two years. I think they’ve lost perspective with the new President’s myopia on geo-diversity. The tour guide said Biddy Martin’s goal is to make Amherst into a place where every country is represented. That’s fine for a Miss Universe pageant, but not a college. It detracts from bringing together the best students, the mission it should be. Diversity should be a goal, but the main one? It was bothersome that they asked which state is the only state they still need–North Dakota, implying that it doesn’t matter what your grades are, if you’re from North Dakota, you hold the missing piece to the puzzle.
@NYMomof2 we were told the same thing at U Penn. I went home and checked the website and Penn did I fact consider a language a core. At least 100 people got the wrong info that day.
Re #122 @frazzled1 - Duke has definitely not dialed it down and I actually thought their attitude was a new thing. DD (HS class of 2016) came home from school this past fall and said that the Duke rep started off the visit to her school by telling the kids that “probably only 2 of you will get in.” Mind you, she went to a private school with 200 kids per grade and the previous year Harvard had accepted 8 kids in the SCEA round from the school. I’m really to sure why Duke thinks it’s a good idea to send reps out with that message when the depth of talent at her school has been known for several generations. It really rubbed me the wrong way.
“It was bothersome that they asked which state is the only state they still need–North Dakota, implying that it doesn’t matter what your grades are, if you’re from North Dakota, you hold the missing piece to the puzzle.”
Well, obviously they do care about grades and other academic criteria or they would have a student from North Dakota. I’m sure they get applicants from all states.
Didn’t hear about the attitude of Duke’s adcoms in the mid-'90s, but due to the fact their sports teams won some important championships and USNWR rated them within the top 5 during my latter HS years, they could have easily felt such snotty attitudes were justified considering the amount of applications and caliber of students they were rejecting.
In my senior year, it wasn’t unusual for students with HYPSMCC admissions in hand to be rejected outright by Duke. Back then, admissions difficult was considered on par with HYPSMCC. One HS friend who was rejected by Duke with nearly a 95/100 and above average SATs for my public magnet was given a full ride FA/scholarship package to Cornell and admitted to Penn, JHU, Williams, etc.
“At Brandeis, the adcom said “Who else in here hates math?” and raised his hand. “Because our flexible requirements are perfect for kids that hate math.” Big turnoff for my D.”
At Washington U in St. Louis, the tour guide kept saying how much she hated math too. She kept saying, “Me and math don’t get along.” I kept thinking, “Apparently, you and English don’t get along either.” lol The endless anti math comments were a big negative for us too.
I find the math comment from Brandeis’ adcom to be ironic considering several math enthusiasts and a couple of math Profs I’ve chatted with mentioned that for a brief period sometime in the ‘60s, Brandeis’ Math department was among the very best in the nation/world.
Incidentally, I didn’t encounter any mathphobic comments from Brandeis’ adcoms when I visited and toured the campus but admittedly, a lot may have changed since the mid-'90s.
We were at the University of Rochester two years ago on Columbus Day. Due to the holiday, they had turned it into a special day to visit with dancers performing, extra talks and presentations, etc. I had heard so many good things about this school and really thought my Ds and and I would love it. We were impressed that the Dean of Admissions was there to address the large group of visitors, too, until he started to explain that U of R is primarily a research institution and that is where their focus is. Therefore, undergraduate teaching is not a priority for them and we should not expect it to be. It’s all about the research. He repeated this a few times in different ways. Well, this may well be true, but is a lack of focus on undergraduate teaching something you really want to hammer into prospective undergraduates and their parents as a way to entice them to apply to your school? The campus is attractive, and on paper, their programs look good, but this really turned us off.
@Springbird ^ WOW! I have heard good things about U of Rochester also and just about to start look into it to possibly include it in DD17’s college list. After reading your post… I am not sure now!
A couple of admissions reps, from Yale and Wellesley, were visiting my region as part of a larger group (half a dozen reps travelling the continent). Spending 20 seconds talking about an alumna like Hillary Clinton can showcase your school’s strengths. Talking about her for several minutes, right before/after your travelling partner from another college does the same, is less advisable.
@Springbird I’m also surprised at the comments of the U of Rochester rep. If there is so little emphasis on undergraduate teaching, why should we consider that very expensive school over our state flagship? Maybe we won’t. The whole reason I have been considering a private school like U of Rochester, for my DS (over our state flagship), is for teaching and smaller classes…AND research, but not at the expense of teaching. I thought URochester had all but maybe not. Thanks for the info.
@Springbird and @appalchymom and @4beardolls Give UR another shot!
My daughter is at Rochester and we went on two visits—one in the spring 2013 and one in the fall of 2014. The first info session was GREAT. The second one…well, it was BAD. I’m betting the same administrator was leading our 2014 session as you had. D probably would be at another school if he had been our first contact with UR, too. I don’t know why they let him talk to prospective students and families. It’s a great school, and my daughter has had great teachers as well as great research opportunities.
@EllieMom, glad to hear your daughter is happy there. I have a friend whose son had a great experience there as well. I agree - URochester really should not let that person speak, although I am pretty sure he said he was the Director of Admissions, so I’m not sure who would tell him he isn’t allowed to present any longer! Unfortunately neither daughter was/is interested, though. It’s hard to turn first impressions around, especially with so many great schools to consider and lists longer than they should be.
An older cousin who graduated in the late '80s and a HS classmate who graduated in the late '90s both had wonderful undergrad experiences at URochester.
Neither felt the research university status detracted from the quality of undergrad teaching they experienced.
I’m a bit late to this thread, but maybe some of the dire warnings about the low acceptance rates at various info sessions are for the benefit of parents more than applicants.
D graduated from URochester 5 years ago and raved about the quality of her professors and their teaching ability. I would take what that dean said with a BIG grain of salt
Re: University of Rochester. MyS13 applied and was accepted to U of R. At first visit, which was a “Research Rochester” day, he loved it and I thought he would apply ED. In Fall of senior year he revisited and went on an engineering tour. After that he still liked the school but was unsure about ED because other schools had risen in his estimation. After acceptance he visited again and he was also immediately turned off by the Director of Admissions’ focus on research at the expense of teaching. And to be fair the place is a Tier 1 Research University. But these comments put U of R into stark contrast with where he ended up attending where the focus at admitted students day was all about teaching, small class sizes, etc. We know many people who have been extremely happy with U of R but after that visit my S was very clear that it wasn’t the best fit for him.