<p>stickershcok, she wasn’t being intoleant at all by that comment, nice try though</p>
<p>I am white and my family was in Colorado, and we too commented on the whiteness of the citizenry- saw few people that weren’t caucasion, and in a land of immigrants it was just weird </p>
<p>Being from a city of many hues, going through such homogenous landscpae can be a shocker</p>
<p>StickerShock, Perhaps it is because the locals there have never seen a Japanese-American except those in the Japanese internment camps?</p>
<p>Before my daughter left for college last month, I sat down with her and told her I hoped she would make good choices in regard to dating. I told her I hoped she would choose not to go out with . . .</p>
<p>a freshman! I say this somewhat tongue-in-cheek because I know you shouldn’t generalize. But . . . when I was at orientation this summer, I met another mom who had a son. Her son was on the shy side and he told his mom he was pretty disgusted with the way the other guys were talking at night in the dorm. All they could talk about was how many girls they were going to “get with” as soon as they got to school. Now, I know all guys aren’t like that, but I bet freshmen are pretty anxious to take advantage of all the freedom and opportunities they have. </p>
<p>Anyway, my point is that I don’t care what race someone is. I would like for my daughter to meet someone whose company she enjoys and who treats her with respect. (So, if she can find a freshman like that, of course I don’t care what grade he is in. I hope you get my point.) :)</p>
<p>Stickershock–as I’ve mentioned recently, my H and I bought a house in South Jersey, and we love it down there–gorgeous scenery, loads of places to bike and kayak, nice neighbors, family nearby. But, we have also commented on how “white” our particular neighborhood turned out to be, and frankly, it is just a tad creepy. Coming from North Jersey–where you and I live–it just seems weird.</p>
<p>Being white myself, I hope you don’t think I’m being intolerant for saying so.;)</p>
<p>Well, if you don’t believe being “creeped out” by the race of people you work with, or live with, or just happen to pass by in your travels, is intolerant, we’ll just have to agree to disagree. Hope you don’t have any traumatic or “creepy” encounters with the “other” in your lifetime. I’ve been creeped out by a man exposing himself, for example. Other races? Nope.</p>
<p>Garland, did you move full time? Or is it a vacation home? </p>
<p>Maybe it’s semantics. If you are used to an integrated neighborhood, then something might seem somehoe different about your new neighborhood. But creepy? That’s a word I’d reserve for something that is disgusting, or threatening.</p>
<p>I will admit that I have felt isolated when in areas surrounded by people who were speaking other languages- I have a difficult time with languages- and really don’t know any besides English, although I have tried.
I don’t expect everyone in Seattle to speak English 24/7, but it does feel isolating when everyone around you is speaking another language than what you can understand, and some are speaking a language that I couldn’t even guess what it was.</p>
<p>I can understand the term- but I would wonder if she has watched the Stepford Wives or Body Snatchers recently :eek:</p>
<p>SS–Temporarily “vacation”, hope to make it full-time when we find jobs down that way. Probably will be a couple years down the line (not a lifestyle we can maintain for long…).</p>
<p>Ya, creeped out was probably just a hastily picked word.</p>
<p>I’m from elsewhere, and have lived in very white neighborhoods in the Mid-west. Never felt awkward, unaccepted, and definitely never creeped out.</p>
<p>Advice to my 3 kids is :God bless you if you meet someone who unconditionally loves you. Be happy. Life is too short. Haha, they immediately fell in love with kids from ‘other races’.</p>
<p>I wouldn’t be “creeped out”, but I would probably feel a bit alienated—at least until I got to know the neighbors, and felt like an accepted part of the community. I would want to feel that my unique family (at least unique for an all white area) would be unlikely to encounter discrimination. My DH is white, I’m black, and our children are obviously bi-racial. Where we live now is very racially pluralistic. There are so many different races and religions in the Hampton Roads region (as well as every sort of combination of mixed marriage household) that people barely blink when we go out. I think that’s why my children are so comfortable in their own skins.</p>
<p>At school, my kids have sometimes been asked, “what ARE you?”, and even though they are often annoyed by this question, they also acknowledge that the question is usually not asked in an antagonistic way. I think the question is probably motivated by curiosity, and a desire to find a category into which to place my kids. I believe it’s human nature to attempt to make sense of the world by placing everything into logical categories. As long as people don’t make negative value judgments based on my family’s racial makeup, it’s fine.</p>
<p>I went to college in the late 70’s in a little village (pop. 2000) that was overwhelmingly white and protestant. At that time, there was only one black family among this “towny” population, and they were rumored to be experiencing considerable problems. Their teen aged son and daughter were literally the only two black kids in their high school, and When it came to dating, they were pretty much out of luck. Whenever I shopped in the little shops in the village, the shop owners often looked at me as if I was some new species of human. I always tried to strike up friendly conversation, to let them see that I was really not that different from their other customers—certainly no different than the other college students who entered their shop. I became friends with some of them after a while. But others never stopped silently shadowing me, as if they were afraid I would steal them blind. It was very discouraging. There were times when I came very close to wheeling around and declaring, “Don’t worry, I DON’T steal!” :rolleyes:</p>
<p>Wow, see I have to come to the aid of my S in law here. She is Japanese, not Japanese American, though went to grad school here, but awhile ago. She lives in an overseas multicultural city similar to San Francisco, works in a multinational environment. This country, in Japan, has a reputation for violence, due to our gun control laws, or the lack thereof. I don’t know if the violence bit was going through her mind, but central Iowa was an unaccustomed environment. If any of you found yourselves in rural Africa or Asia, no one around that looked like you, and you were unsure of local sentiment toward your race, might it be a bit disconcerting? Like you wouldn’t want to be dropped off alone in that place? That was the feeling I referred to.</p>
<p>I see what you mean, great lakes mom—kind of like if I were to suddenly find myself the only black woman in a remote province of Japan. :(</p>
<p>We went camping in the west Virginia mountains, and when we walked into the little grocery store, everyone, like EVERYONE stopped working/shopping and gawked at us. It was quite odd. You could tell that they had not left the mountain ever.</p>
<p>perhaps because this was a japanese girl in an white area, she felt a vibe, which wouldn’t be suprising</p>
<p>When I left SoCal, I was really surprised by the whiteness of our new small NorCal town, it was also an intriguing dynamic to meet a new low socioeconomic class- essentially white trash- who were totally content (in appearance at least) with their lot in life wheras the OC in which I grew up was full of Mexican, SE Asian, and all sorts of other immigrants, all trying to better themselves. I was amazed at the overwhelming whiteness of our new area and the disinterest in improving ones lot in life.</p>
<p>My kids are all of the same race, yet they look like they are difference races and have frequently been asked what they are- not the blonde one, but the other two 
Just the mysteries of genetics.</p>
<p>We have neighbors who are white but have an adopted african american daughter. Our town’s probably about 99% white. She asked my daughter not too long ago (they’re 11) if she knew of any “brown boys” that she could introduce her to. I think it would be difficult to be the “only” in a situation like hers.</p>
<p>A close relative and her husband are educated professionals, but lead quite “provincial” lives centered around their own set of friends and acquaintances who are long-time residents of their almost totally white community (actually in the same county where I live). In contrast, my husband and I are friends with and work with people of many backgrounds and from many different nations. Recently, my relative told me she and her husband had attended a party given by the mother of her child’s friend. Apparently the woman works for a large corporation and also invited her coworkers. “It was a very diverse party,” my relative told me in excitement. “There was a black person there and an Indian couple and a…” I was thinking to myself that this just sounds like a typical group of friends to me. It is pretty amazing how different people’s perspectives living in the same area and with a similar level of education can be.</p>
<p>dke, when I lived in a rural community (although it was divided rouglhy in thirds, Caucasian/African American/Latino…), I had a conversation with a black mom (substitute teacher) whose 2 kids were among the top in the h.s. Her problem was that hers were decidedly college-bound, spoke flawless grammar, got pegged for “oreo” and all that junk. </p>
<p>Her solution was to go to regional meetings/potluck dinners of college-bound black families, so the kids could socialize outside of their h.s. communities. She said it was essential to her kids’ well-being, and let them hang onto themselves until their first college year. I think she drove an hour or so, and they met around every 6 weeks. They often dated from this circle, so their h.s. didn’t limit them. It sounded very family-friendly.</p>
<p>I WISH I knew the contact point for such a network; mabye others know of it? Was it unique to that mountainous region? I hope not. Does anyone here know…?</p>
<p>Paying3, what a fantastic idea…it would be well worth one hour’s drive for her kids to be exposed to other ambitious kids like hers.</p>