So, we haven’t had a wedding thread in a week or so…
D2 and I were invited to go with my future DIL and her family to try on wedding dresses Sunday - so excited!
She is the youngest of 4 girls - and the first one to get married - let me tell ya, I can’t WAIT to hear the opinions fly! Her mom and DIL’s 17 year old niece will also be there - so in total, 8 including bride to be.
I know enough to smile, nod, make her beam and pass out the kleenex. No problem!
Just wondered if there are any tips, anything I should bring (like seriously, kleenex???) or anything I should know about the experience??
Future DIL actually happens to work at this bridal shop - she will have the shop to herself and her choice of consultant on that day (the shop will be closed otherwise) so we won’t have strict time limits or crowds to worry about. She clearly knows wedding finery but I believe she will have “a moment” when she realizes that this time, it’s for her!
Enjoy! My Ds invited the grooms’ moms, and sisters, and in one case, grandmothers, to the search for gowns and it was lots of fun. The fact that you will have the salon to yourselves is good!
Since she works at this shop I would think she probably has the dresses narrowed down. I would just make sure and say you think she looks lovely in all of them.
Congratulations! I would suggest that you bring a few snacks like hard candies and pretzels. You might also consider asking her in advance if she would like you to take some photos. I would also send her a note after thanking her for including you and letting her know what a wonderful time you had!
How sweet! It sounds like you have a fantastic relationship and we all know how supportive and upbeat you are! I can see why she would want you there!!!
My niece invited me to her dress-search day. I was thrilled as I only have boys and have no idea if I’ll ever get another chance. Now, I didn’t really have a dog in this hunt so it was easy to be the perfect guest … Smiling and nodding the whole way. What helped is that she had a strong idea of what she wanted. She had a perfect body (hell, after three kids she still has the perfect body), and really understood what looked good on her. There wasn’t a lot of hand-wringing and indecision.
Like someone said above, because she works there she probably has a sense of what she wants already. I’d gush over all the choices but wouldn’t be afraid to say --once-- if you really have a favorite as she isn’t likely to try on something she doesn’t already like. I think keeping comments to a minimum though is probably best.
FYI, I just found out last month that her MIL hated my niece’s dress. Lol! Thankfully, she never said that seven years ago.
I don’t see why you can’t make comments as long as they’re positive and not pushy. Like saying “The neckline on this one really looks great,” when what you mean is “The neckline on the one you tried on five minutes ago looked terrible.”
I would encourage her to choose what she loves, not try and please everyone. I don’t really get the group outing for the dress…8 people? How do you choose by committee? She’ll know it when she puts it on. She should also know to not even look at dresses outside her price range.
I wouldn’t comment except praise. @Marian, there are already 5 other women there closer to her than the OP – the bride most wants to please them. One more opinion in this is like a distant relative weighing in on your kid’s college search – not helpful 99.9% of the time! It is so nice of her to invite the OP, and sounds like a lot of fun. But the OP should (and clearly knows) to just smile and nod.
Back in the day brides would take their moms, and maybe some bridesmaids. I think once again a reality show changed the dynamics(Say yes to the dress). It used to be a bride wanted to limit who would see her dress before she came down the aisle. If I am blessed with a daughter in law, I wont be offended if she doesnt invite me. I think that should be a special time for her and her mother. On the flip side, I hope my daughters, if ever married, arent pressured to invite a group, though I also wont be offended should they decide to include others.
She is very close to her mom, sisters and niece - her dad dumped the family when she was quite young and has no little interest in his girls. So over time, they have developed one giant girl bonding family - really, that’s wonderful. If there are any extras here its me and my D - we will be nothing but supportive to “bride” and whoever needs it in her family.
I have been surprised that she hasn’t been “tempted” to try on any dresses yet being she works in the shop, but she was disciplined in wanting to wait for the right time to do it - and to do it like others do it!
Having been through this three times already (and two to go!), I can say that in our experience, it isn’t a decision by committee. It is simply wanting to have loved ones there for the experience itself. All of my Ds made the decision to choose the dress they wanted. It’s not as if everyone got a vote!
D and I wanted to invite her fiance’s mother (who has only sons and would love it), but unfortunately it did not work out due to her living several states away. I think it is a lovely idea.
