<p>Me and my friend both want to major in engineering and we both want to get out of Texas. He is my best friend and I am his, but I can feel the tension building up within both of us. We both know a school like CMU or MIT isn’t going to accept two students from the same school in the same year. We used to help each other out all the time, now sometimes we don’t give each other answers like we used to, probably hoping the other would make a worse grade. I can feel his jealousy at times, and I can tell when he is stealthily trying to say that his grades are better than mine. Now, I get the feeling I should retain information that will give me a higher chance at getting in to a good school, whereas I would have openly discussed it with him before. He is probably the same way. This has been on my mind all day because, during tennis period, he brought up that a school like CMU wouldn’t accept us both in the same year. We are both probably applying to the same schools: CMU, MIT, whatever is best for engineering. Now, I feel like I shouldn’t have told him everything I have about technology, everything I have about schools. He didn’t know CMU existed until I told him. I shouldn’t have introduced him to the robotics kit I was getting, now he is going to get one as well. I still want to be friends with him, but I am afraid that we have too much in common, and he could be a threat to my admission. Please don’t think I am crazy, I can tell for sure that he is thinking exactly the same things that I am. Counsel me?</p>
<p>No… Just an empathetic discussion. I sometimes feel the same too.</p>
<p>Being from the same high school is no reason for CMU or MIT to reject either one of you. Granted, I probably come from a very different background, but my school sends multiple people to CMU each year, and some years multiple people to MIT too.</p>
<p>Continue being friends and doing what you love. And don’t blame each other if a certain decision scenario ends up happening, because it probably wasn’t the cause. :)</p>
<p>I thought you were paranoid until I read this</p>
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<p>Things can get in the way of friendships. Unless both parties can rise above the outside circumstances then the friendship might not survive.</p>
<p>You want advice? Don’t try too hard to hang on to this friendship, let things play out on their own. You’re either important to him or you’re not. If you are then he’ll quite this petty nonsense and try to be a friend. If you’re not then there are other people to be friends with.</p>
<p>You’re insecure and paranoid that he is skimming your uniqueness from you. He is your competitor and feels he has to be better than you. Tell him that the wait for acceptances is causing too much tension and you need space from him. Then let the rest play out.
What brought you two together is now driving your friendship apart, ironic, isn’t it?</p>
<p>Here’s something that might amaze you all: we are both freshmen in highschool. Coincidentally (perhaps) we are the two most success-oriented freshmen. We both care about our futures more than anything. We both try to be better in athletics, academics, etc. We both even talk about our families of doctors, but “I have a family of doctors” is where I stop. He proceeds to talk about his successful optometrist dad and his cousin who is “really liked by Yale, and he’s going to get in because they like him so much.” We are just freshman and I can feel the sense of competition already. We’ve got some years to go. Hopefully I can graduate early so that I will not have to worry about competing with my friend, but with other people.</p>
<p>Toxic friend. Too intense. Too competitive. Too copycat. Don’t graduate early, use your 4 years to build your best transcript. Don’t share with him anymore. Find other friends, other interests. Don’t tell him about this website -he’ll know you blabbed about him. He is smothering you. By the way, he would have found out about CMU sooner than later. You should also stop obsessing about college-too early. Enjoy hs.</p>
<p>I agree with all of the above. Toxic friendship. High school is a time to work hard & play hard, not just work hard. I agree with literally everything Batllo said - other friends, other interests, and enjoy high school!</p>
<p>Agree with posts #7 and #8. But, one of you applying to CMU definitely doesn’t exclude the other one getting accepted. There were only about 130 kids in my son’s graduating class, and 5 of them got accepted to CMU. But it is hard dealing with a hyper-competitive person on a daily basis. If he can’t let up, detach yourself from him.</p>
<p>You should both chill out. 15 is too young to be worrying about all of this crap. It’s just a college-- in all seriousness, there are four years of fun times ahead of you. Stop worrying so much! You’ll develop a stress ulcer or something. 
You’re just children, and you shouldn’t be so hardcore about college admission just yet. Focus on your studies and having fun, not on “getting into MIT/CMU.”</p>
<p>I might also add that high school changes people a ton. You might not be friends with him by senior year, and then it won’t be competition among friends any more. Additionally, it’s untrue that CMU only accepts one person from each school, because a great deal of my friends know someone from their high school at CMU. The quad next door to me is 3 guys from the same high school and 1 random fourth guy.</p>
<p>go lift weights, join the soccer team, etc. if he follows you, good for him. you guys can spot each other and have healthy competition. if he keeps building robots, let him do that. if you want to keep building robots, you do that. If you guys are both smart, you’ll both end up at CMU.</p>
<p>You know what…I had a similar opinion sometime ago. I felt that the top schools wouldn’t really want to accept multiple applicants from the same school/background. This isn’t entirely true however as I found out later. Quite a few guys from my school have been admitted to the same place. If you’re both qualified, then you both stand a fairly good chance of getting in. Heard about those quadruplets who got into Yale?</p>
<p>“Heard about those quadruplets who got into Yale?”</p>
<p>Haha, I feel like same-age siblings are an exception to the rule. Last year at my HS we had two twins who both got into Stanford for cross country. One had significantly lower grades than the other, but… c’mon. How do you take one twin and not the other?</p>
<p>doesnt cmu have a 30% or higher acceptance rate? I remember around 10 people or so got in last year</p>
<p>As I’ve stated before, it is great to have general college aspirations as a freshman … but not to get to overwhelmed about competition and specifici schools. It is true that many schools admit multiple candidates per high school, so I wouldn’t worry about that. In fact, working on projects with a like minded smart thing could be win-win. But in this case it is possible that the particular friend might drive ya nuts. Look to add other friends who will make high school challenging AND fun. </p>
<p>My son spent 3 years picking activities (mostly music) that energized him with little thought of college EC value. (I was documenting in a draft resume, knowing he’d need it to recall all the cool stuff at application time). Engineering schools like him, despite the lack of robotics etc.</p>
<p>I personally know two kids from same high school who both got into mit yesterday…have faith</p>
<p>This isn’t healthy. I will say it now and I will say it clearly: you can’t live you life like this. Don’t always dream of tomorrow; don’t work so hard for that stupid name that you lose everything in the process. High School is a time for exploration, fun, and personal growth, and above all, high school is the eternal “day in the sunshine”–it is your childhood. Do not be so flippant with a thing of such value. Simply put, enjoy life and enjoy what you do.</p>
<p>That said, your relationship with that friend is (or in the future, will become) tumultuous, in the least, if you both continue to harbor secret resentment. I personally have a friend of equal academic caliber to myself who also applied to my favorite schools–but we have faced not even a bit of resentment. I find solace in the knowledge that both of us value our friendship more than a petty piece of paper with the word “accepted” scrawled in boisterous school colors on it. </p>
<p>I will end by adding my belief on the nature of competition. It can be an impetus for great accomplishment, but the thrill of victory cannot be one’s only source of sustenance.</p>
<p>SheenR,</p>
<p>My advice is to go back to helping your friend as you both did before. Stay on your original track of pushing each other forward in a friendly way. Help him even if he doesn’t in return. It will be more fun in H.S. and you’ll both end up in good colleges.</p>
<p>Wheaty</p>
<p>I feel like I have to quote Revenge of the Nerds here: “NEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEERDS!”</p>
<p>But seriously, you are a freshmen and are already stressing about this kind of stuff? Both you and your friend need a reality check.</p>
<p>On the plus side… Sheen and his friend have three years to prep their parents about the sky high costs of college. It does take a while to get used to that. </p>
<p>We parents often start out expecting that bright kids will mean big scholarships, but sometimes those bright kids ending up being best suited to colleges with lots of other bright students (so less scholarship opportunity). It’s an evolution.</p>
<p>For eager students like Sheen, I think summer programs could be fun / challenging / great. The sticker shock (and scheduling hurdles) scared us off, but it is a good idea if you can make it happen.</p>