<p>Me: currently busy saving the world, boys can wait until I have finished (or at least until graduation)
Tio(for all intensive purposes is his name): intelligent, old school chivalrous, attractive, driven…and he likes me
Problem: I am not really looking for that right now.
Band aid solution, which has not worked: For the last year, any guy seeking anything but my simple friendship has recieved a curt, blunt NO. I cannot do that to Tio. He is too good of a person, and I value his alliance so I set up a series of obstacles. First, I made very sure that he was aware that I was not going to date until after graduation, when I moved away for college. He still seeks to get to know me better… of which I am reluctant. Next, I had his niece tell him about how I am an abstinence outreach officer for my local crisis pregnancy resource center(usually a huge turnoff, not to him). Finally, before I gave him my number, I made him call my older brother and ask if it was okay, which he was fine with… I am running out of reasons not to let him into my life. He has passed every test with flying colors. He has unknowingly begun to gain my respect. I think he might be gaining more than my respect. I dont know what to do now.</p>
<p>Tell him that your simply not ready… If he understands, he should just cease his actions, if he continues, then he’s immature and proves he is not ‘‘too good of a person.’’</p>
<p>Not ready. Thats brilliant. It seems so simple, yet I was completely and totally unable to sum it up into any sort of comprehensible language. I mean I have had relationships before, yet they have always been…well, like myspace: a fun way to waste time, but in the end, more drama then they are worth. Its just weird. I never got attention in middleschool. At all. I was the girl who read Cacther in the Rye in the beack of the class, but somewhere along the twisted and hectic road of highschool I opened Vogue after finishing Tortilla Flats and the light came on. Lol, Im sorry. I didnt mean to go all Oprah.</p>
<p>Ok, I’m gonna play Devil’s advocate here. </p>
<p>I understand the save the world thing, I am just like you. </p>
<p>The problem is, you’ll look back on high school and regret not getting to know him better. He seems like a great guy and you’ve got to learn how to balance a social life on top of everything else. Boys don’t HAVE to hinder ANYTHING.
I’ve been with the same guy for nearly two years now and it hasn’t stopped me from doing anything. If anything it helps because I get him to help me with everything I do. He knew what I was passionate about before we began to date and it’s never affected us.</p>
<p>Honestly, give this a chance. You don’t have to treat even friendships like political alliances. Give Tio a chance, he obviously likes you.</p>
<p>Oh and about the abstinence thing. You don’t HAVE to have sex in a relationship. I believe in abstinence too, but not because I am religious. I just simply believe sixteen year olds don’t need to have sex. Like I said, I’ve been dating the same guy for two years and he knows if he ever pressured me, we’d be done. So it’s not CRITICAL in a relationship, and honestly just stupid at our age.</p>
<p>Haha, friendship, politcal alliance. That parts complicated. Im “in good” with his family and Im friends with his nieces (who are his age, catholic anti birth control thing). I dont knopw where the word alliance came from, but that was what I meant. Abstinece thing, I am not anti relationship (at all, I did a six month-er sophmore year, and another similar one juinor year…that is where I get my bases for the myspace analogy), Abstinence just happens to be a turn off to most guys, haha not that I blame them.</p>
<p>Thank you, I think I will give him a chance. He respects me, which is big. In latin america, a girl is either “marrigable” (goin old school), or basically a whore. I have proven worthy of his respect (not that he disrepects the other sort, as far as I have seen).</p>
<p>what the hell is “the risk”?</p>
<p>She thinks by choosing the guy she risks… saving the world? </p>
<p>I’m not really sure what the risk is either.</p>
<p>I dont effing know. My time? My caring? My craziness? I dont effing know because I am effing going crazy because I cannot wait until mid december to find out if I made it into my number one school. So to answer your question, I am sorry. I fail at life.</p>
<p>Lol I got the alliance from “I value his alliance so I set up a series of obstacles.”</p>
<p>tdanielle, he’s just trying to show you that you cannot shut other people out because you’re trying to do something. Nobody said anything about you failing at life, it’s just that there’s really no risk if he’s passed everything you’ve set up.</p>
<p>But what romanigypsyeyes said sounds alot more selfless and heroic than my rant, so listen to her. Why rogyeyes is your sn sooo hard to spell? Your a rock star, but your lose points for that.</p>
<p>It’s easier when it’s capitalized like it’s supposed to be. Lol.</p>
<p>Call me Kat, it’s my name.</p>
<p>No, I ment, I dont know where IIIIII got the word alliance. God, why do you make so much sense? That just is not fair.</p>
<p>Okay, Kat makes me happy. Romaniwhateverface does not. So you shall be Kat.</p>
<p>Lol, I didn’t know I did… </p>
<p>And oops, sorry :]. I thought you meant where did I get it from?</p>
<p>BTW, speaking of abstinence. Did you ever go to The Ring Thing? </p>
<p>I was supposed to go one year with my exboyfriend, but the night before he got arrested for selling drugs. I always wondered if it was any good.</p>
<p>Haha, no. I have to talk on “Cross you legs for Jesus day” to the middle schoolers (note:not actual name)</p>
<p>Lol, I had a xbf get arrested for possesion with intent to sell…and then for stealing his moms car…</p>
<p>Oh, that sucks. I’ll be honest. </p>
<p>I talk to after school programs because I don’t speak about abstinence from a religious perspective, since I am not religious. </p>
<p>Well I am, but my religion has no restrictions on sexuality.</p>
<p>When I have my absitince outreach cap on, its from a religious perspective, because that is how they want me to talk about it, but it wasnt about the religion for me. Im a “to each his own” kind of a girl. So when I talk about ME, I talk about how as women, we are treasures to be sought after, not merely targets to be aimed at.</p>
<p>That’s admirable :].</p>