A couple questions …do you normally have an easy time socially and aren’t there some other local people to hang with since you are also still close to home?
Again, even commuter schools have activities or various ways to integrate, including in the dept. If this is one with literally nothing, even profs shutter up after class, then OP may need to find this interaction elsewhere.
I’m sorry you are feeling this, it is hard when the college experience is not what someone once hoped it would be. It is a time for making friends to take forward in life, and although there will be other chances to do this, it is hard to be lonely in college. Have you looked at options where you could transfer and it is in between cheap and expensive? Someone mentioned your in-state schools. Can you tell us what state you are in so we can offer some ideas? Even a couple hours away can feel far - you don’t have to go across the country or OOS and pay a lot of money. A lot of kids transfer schools - keep in mind transfer applications are generally due Feb 1st (however the UCs were due Nov 30, so check dates at various schools) so you should be looking into that now and get things rolling over the holidays should you decide that is the right path for you.
I am not advocating transferring or staying, but if you are at all serious about a change, you need to get familiar with the dates and process as part of your overall decision.
One other thing to consider: If you choose to transfer, make sure you won’t lose credits along the way. Speaking from observation and experience, transferring in such a way that results in your four year program take five years, no matter the social situation, can be financially unpleasant.
I’m curious why anyone would want to add more debt to student loan debt. Almost every person who graduates will have at least $35,000 in student loan debt. If you are a hard worker and really good at finances, this debt will be fully paid off in 20 years.
So again, do you really want to add more debt onto your future? Unless you are rich or somehow extremely fortunate, don’t expect to ever get a good financial loan until after your debt is paid. Things get expensive : )
My son is a commuter. It was difficult for him to connect with people his first semester. He tried different clubs and activities so he stayed busy, but it wasn’t until his 2nd semester that he started to really feel at home.
There’s nothing wrong with applying to different schools. In the meantime, be as active as you can on your current campus and see how you feel next summer.
I was a commuter during the three years I was at Maryland (where I transferred from a CC, which was as you’d expect a commuter school). I met lots of people there—I worked on campus and joined a couple campus organizations (in one of which I met the person I would eventually marry, in fact). I didn’t simply kvetch about being a commuter and decide that that made it impossible for me to meet people.
Every single college out there has a set of sponsored clubs and organizations (and usually a set that aren’t officially sponsored), whether it’s a commuter college or not. Use them. I don’t predict you’ll meet your future spouse, but I do feel confident you’ll meet friends.
Are you in the Honors program? If not, look quickly for ways in which current stusents can apply (deadlines for spring should be about right now and often require a good GPA and a letter of recommendation from a professor). There’s typically an “Honors community” even on commuter campuses.
In addition, can your situation be “not free but cheap”, IE., stay at this university where you have free tuition and pay for room/board in one of the living learning communities (if not honors, then one that matches your interests?)
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Is it better to go to college cheap and miserable, or expensive and in debt? <<
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Cheap and miserable is better. Because whether or not you are miserable may largely be up to you. It could very well turn into cheap and happy, with minimal debt. or even cheap and “meh, it’s OK” with minimal debt.
Now consider the alternative. You could very well go expensive and in debt – and STILL wind up miserable. There is absolutely no guarantee that another school with a bigger price tag comes with a pot of happiness at the end of the rainbow. And even if you are happier for a couple of years at a different school – your new miserable begins as soon as you have to begin paying off that big debt.
Choose cheap, and take advantage of every club, social activity, study group, sporting event, and personal relationship to turn miserable into better and even happy.