Is it normal or acceptable to be 27 and never had a girlfriend or kissed

I’ve been diagnosed with Asperger’s and never had any luck with dating. I was considering paying for my first time since I don’t have faith that I’ll ever find someone.

I recently left my church community and don’t know if God exists because autism never goes away. I was a math major and know data analysis but can’t find a position in the data science field because it’s extremely competitive.

Who can help here?

What have you tried to find a dating partner? Church? Online? School ?

I do know some young people your age who have not found anyone. I truly understand. Many people are lonely, COVID has also affected options for meeting. Asperger’s can feel like an obstacle. Would you consider working with a coach?

The job issue is separate but also difficult. Have you worked with career services at your school? How do you go about a job search? Again, a coach might help with applications and interview prep.

I wish you luck! And don’t forget that COVID is a factor. Many young people have basically lost two years. I know my kids have.

1 Like

Fully agree that the last 2 years have made social life exceedingly difficult for many young adults. You are not alone and I hope you can give yourself a break. There are just fewer opportunities to meet people during a pandemic. Have you used dating sites? Some are specifically for folks on the spectrum and those could be a good place to start. If you don’t find someone right away, it’s okay, just give it some time.

Re jobs–also agree that a job coach could be a good thing. Once again the pandemic has closed us off and everything is harder–interviews included. Or ask a family friend to help you practice for interviews. I have helped young people prep for interviews… but you have to be open to hearing suggestions, make those changes, and keep practicing. In the meantime, I also know a few recent grads that have taken positions far outside their intended fields, maybe not even using their degrees, until the right opportunity presents itself.

You’ll get there!!


You asked the same question almost exactly a year ago. I will repeat what I wrote back then:

I will reiterate - look for dating sites that are geared towards ASD people.

I’ll also second what @NYMom122 wrote - get a job coach, and, like with dating, get one who who works with people who are ASD. Otherwise, it’s like trying to run a gasoline car on diesel. You’re wired differently, and therefore need different strategies than somebody who is neurotypical.

Again, good luck!

1 Like