Is it normal to not make friends in the dorms?

<p>I transferred to my school last fall, and almost right away I could tell that I wouldn’t be able to become close friends with anyone on my floor just because I could tell that I wouldn’t have much common ground with them, at least not enough to become friends with them. The first couple weeks, I still tried to involve myself in as many activities with them as possible so that I could see if I could salvage anything - Texas Hold-Em, political discussions, getting trashed on the weekends, etc. but I still couldn’t make anything happen. These were good people, but I simply couldn’t relate to them that much, a big reason being that they were just different people than me, and they were more conservative than me, both politically and in terms of lifestyle. After the first 2 or 3 weeks of school, I began to get frustrated and I didn’t bother to socialize with them as much, and I could tell I was, to an certain extent, becoming an outcast there. It didn’t exactly help matters that they pretty much didn’t go out to parties here anymore after that, which really frustrated me because that’s what I like to do on the weekends. I wasn’t meeting anyone in my classes or otherwise, so all I could do was move out into a different res hall. The fact that many of the people at my school are the type I do seem to click well with made this seem even more frustrating.</p>

<p>Since then, I joined a club on campus and met someone who lives in an oceanside apartment complex with some other guys who I actually fit in with and can actually have fun with, so it looks like I’ve probably solved my problem of not meeting anyone I can become good friends with. But I still haven’t made any friends at all in the dorms, even the new one I moved into (a 4-person suite). Although it may not really matter if/when I become good friends with those guys in that apartment complex, is it normal to any extent for someone to not make any friends in the dorms when they start college because of what I described above? It seems like this isn’t normal, and that most people make at least a couple friends there almost right away. I thought that there would be at least a few people in the dorms that I would want to become friends with, and that it would only be a matter of getting that done in the first week or so when friendships develop there. I imagine it would be the coolest thing to live with your close friends in college, it looks like I won’t be able to do that, at least not until next year when hopefully I can get an apartment off-campus, but at least it looks like I’ve found some people that I can become pretty tight with eventually.</p>

<p>its not their fault that your stuck up</p>

<p>It’s not necesarily his either, though, proton. Some people are just too different to hang out with.</p>

<p>I don’t think he’s stuck up. I don’t really have any close friends in my dorm either. Everyone says “oh your best friends will be from your dorm” but that’s not always the case. Just because you live with a certain group of people doesn’t mean you’ll automatically like them, I know that hasn’t happened for me. I’m happy that you’ve found a group of people that you like though, even if they are outside of the dorm.</p>

<p>Yeah sure it’s normal.</p>

<p>You might simply be trying too hard. Don’t try to force a friendship with anyone, even the guys you think you might be getting tight with. Just relax and let things happen at their own speed.</p>

<p>yea each person is different. I don’t make friend easily either.</p>

<p>Yeah I live in an enginerding dorm. I tried desperately to fit in but I just couldn’t. I’m not a gamer spending endless hours in front of a computer screen, I don’t speak 1337 (I learned that last semester haha), eating alone, staying in on weekends, I mean they have a frigging board game night on Saturday and get this Dungeons and Dragons night on Friday. A few made fun of me when I couldn’t set up my computer without directions haha. Sometimes I feel really isolated here and stuck. It’s just feelings tho. I usually end up going out to meet friends. I have absolutely zero (okay I’m lying I have a lot of friends there b/c I’m social but most aren’t people I’d hang out with) friends that I go out with regularly from my dorm so if you don’t mesh that’s okay. Just try a new place out next year.</p>

<p>Don’t stress out about it. Sometimes I think it is a bit silly how just because random people are assigned to live together that they are expected to somehow (magically) become friends. If you click with people, thats great. If not, cest la vie.</p>