<p>Here’s one thing I can tell you for sure–if this girl ever reads your post, she’ll be utterly horrified.</p>
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<p>That would be Delilah DiCrescenzo. She did run track for Columbia and in fact still competes professionally. Her event is the steeplechase. She has made the Olympic Trials but not yet the Olympic team.</p>
<p>The longest OP I remember seeing.</p>
<p>It’s much better to be chased by a girl than to chase a girl, for a guy. I remember older people saying that when I was young.</p>
<p>Oh please. I call ■■■■■. This is someone practicing their writing skills, mixing in reality with fantasy. Probably an English major, maybe male, maybe female.</p>
<p>One long bizarre post with all sorts of references to “his” English reading assignments? All sorts of extraneous personal information completely not relevant to the subject? And no responses to any of the posters who bothered to respond?</p>
<p>Someone having a little fun with the parents.</p>
<p>busdriver11, I certainly hope so because I pity the young lady in this fantasy.</p>
<p>Ah, don’t worry MizzBee. Should any semblance of this be true, the OP is far more obsessed with himself than any girl.</p>
<p>Short answer: Yes, it’s wrong to choose a college based on your reasons for the reasons others have echoed.</p>
<p>Longer answer: I’m with the general blunt consensus of my fellow public magnet high school classmates: You’d have to be extremely immature and/or an idjit for the sake of a GF/BF/SO. </p>
<p>Basing your college selection criteria on chasing a creepy obsession is exponentially worse. :(</p>
<p>Damn this sounds like it needs to be published as a love story lol. I can relate this to many romantic movies/ dramas or something.</p>
<p>Best narrative essay by far.</p>
<p>TLDR</p>
<p>yes</p>
<p>TLDR??? Vas is this?</p>
<p>Hi, sorry for not following up to any replies sooner. I haven’t had the time to check collegeconfidential until now.</p>
<p>First off, I’m not ■■■■■■■■. I don’t intend to waste my time for a cheap laugh when I’m looking for clarity from others. I knew that it would be unavoidable to come off as a stalker while writing this, but that’s precisely why I posted this in the first place. Despite the fact that my life is better than it has been in years, I recognize that the cause of it is unhealthy, and I need constructive criticism (both blunt and soft) in order to reevaluate myself before things take a turn for the worst. I knew the answer to my question. Of course it’s wrong to put a heavy weight on someone in terms of deciding where to pursue an education, but I didn’t want to admit that. I’m convinced that I have to now, though.</p>
<p>Classof2015, I have plenty of friends to hang out with; friends who are still local and my teammates (this weekend, for example, was a blast despite the fact that I should be a hermit for upcoming finals :p). But I do see what you’re saying. I need to find more inspiration from other people and things; not just her.</p>
<p>jym626, yes, Berkeley was indeed my dream school for all of like a few months, but I realized that the desire was egotistical. I just wanted to go where a lot of the kids at the top of my class were going. Having said that, after a combination of researching the school over the summer, visiting the campus, and talking to a few friends who graduated from Cal (freshman admits and transfers alike), I’m sure it would be a good fit for me.</p>
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<p>I agree, but I was too lazy to stop writing. :)</p>
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<p>Yeah. We’ve sat down and talked and had lunches together and stuff. We’re friends, although I wouldn’t say our friendship is very developed considering the way I feel. (in that she was a busy person, and then I would be occupied often when she had time, and then doubly so in college since we’re hours away from each other and now I’m a busy person and she’s still busy)</p>
<p>Magnetron, absolutely not. I will not give up pole vaulting unless I decide to transfer to a university where I do not meet their athletic standards. I played sports for years throughout my childhood as I believed it was important to be physically active, at least until I began to lose purpose in life when high school came around. Fast-forward to my junior year and I finally found my thing. Not only is the event a blast, I’ve also met a lot of good and fun people through it, and it would be a shame to give that up now. One of my teammates, a sophomore, is practically an older brother to me. In fact, if anyone has come close to inspiring me as much as the girl that I’ve mentioned, it’s him. Not to mention how lucky I feel to have my coach as a mentor. The amount of passion that he’s put into pole vault makes my crush on this girl look minuscule. He’s given everything and more to the pole vault community, and I would severely disappoint him if I were to walk away after all of this time that he’s invested in me, especially right before a season.</p>
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<p>Yes, but they are not unheard of. And just because something isn’t normal means it’s wrong? I’m already convinced that I shouldn’t do this, but it’s not because I fear being abnormal. I don’t want to be normal. Great people are not normal. The most successful are not normal. Those are people who went above and beyond what is normal in order to succeed. This site, for example, attracts far beyond the normal student. Self-studying three APs, in addition to having five in your schedule, plus being captain of the swim team and finding the time to be a first-chair clarinet player in your school’s concert band is not normal, but you have students who meet that benchmark all over this website.</p>
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<p>I don’t know if that’s entirely true because I’ve basically told her most of this (not my transfer plans), and she’s still friendly with me as far as me visiting her and hanging out when she’s back in town. She’s a very mature person and extremely analytical. I mean, she’s looking into majoring in cognitive science (although she’s not entirely sold on it), so maybe she’s interested in different ways that people can think?</p>
<p>I agree that it would be best for me to distance myself from her as much as possible for now. This does not mean that I’m ruling out UCSD. I will consider transferring there if I’m given the opportunity to pole vault, but I am leaving my options open as far as colleges go. She won’t play a weight in my decision.</p>
<p>When I see her over the break I’ll admit that I have a problem and that it would be best if we didn’t see each other for a while. I’ll make it clear that I’m open to friendship in the future, but for now I need to clear my thoughts. We go to the same church though. If I see her during mass I’ll be sure to give a wave and a smile, but nothing more.</p>
<p>This is going to be painful. I’ve thought about her everyday now for a little more than two years, and I’ve had these feelings for at least seven. You just don’t forget someone like that easily. I’ve got an exchange from Death of a Salesman that struck me on this possibility the first time I went through it.</p>
<p>Bernard: But sometimes, Willy, it’s better for a man just to walk away.
Willy: But if you can’t walk away?
Bernard: I guess that’s when it’s tough.</p>
<p>Regardless, I can learn something from this. If I ever find another woman as great as her then I know what to do from the get-go. I’ll pursue her immediately instead of allowing my imagination to carry things into a realm of impossibility after years go by. Until then I’m staying single. There are plenty of women in my life; few of them are wonderful; none of them are as great as her.</p>
<p>The inspiration that she gave me hasn’t faltered. I still want to improve as a person as much as possible, but now I don’t know where to go after a year-and-a-half. The direction is gone. I have purpose and I know what to do for now, but what happens next?</p>
<p>And what if my obsession gets worse by trying to forget about her? It’s obvious that my passion is heated. FYI, I would never do anything dangerous to her. My moral standards are way too high. I’m talking more along the lines of being a mental danger to myself. I said that high school was a bad time for me, especially sophomore year, but it was actually the winter of my junior year that ranks as the worst period of my life. I was diagnosed with depression, and I strongly believe it was due to a combination of my deteriorating grades and because I was trying to shut her out at the time. After I didn’t ask her to a dance at the homecoming that year I began to lose confidence in my ability to do anything, so I thought that forgetting about her would solve my problems. It didn’t. I began to experience nights where I could not fall asleep, and I was unable to focus in my classes, especially the ones she was in. I was against taking medication despite having thoughts of suicide (I’m straight-edge so I don’t drink or use any kind of drug). Eventually, I started to feel better and my thinking cleared, but it’s pretty much because I started to embrace how much I like her. From there the whole fantasy thing escalated.</p>
<p>I’m more mature now than I was then, and thus I have a better control over the way I think, but I’m still worried. I don’t ever want to experience that kind of misery again.</p>
<p>And I really appreciate the comments, despite a few mean-spirited ones. You guys induced an epiphany that wouldn’t have been possible on my own. As much as I value self-analysis, stubbornness makes it hard to believe in the right answer for something like this. And I have spoke of my situation with friends and family, and they aren’t as nearly one-sided. As I said, my Dad is for it, my Mom is completely against it, and then my friends are divided (a few have told me you’re committed, not obsessed, others think I’m being silly). Maybe it’s because they actually know of her and who I am, but I still think you guys have a point.</p>
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<p>Seek help? I say this in all seriousness.</p>
<p>^I’m sure I’ll be fine, mostly because I managed to find some good out of all of this. And it’s like I don’t have to forget about her entirely. I can think of her out of inspiration only.</p>
<p>hamlin4th needs clarification on the difference in usage between “normal” and words like “typical”, “common” or “ordinary”. (re: post 32) Normal has a very different meaning.</p>
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<p>If your choices are UCSD with pole vault, or UCLA (or Cal) without, then, in my opinion, UCLA would be the better option. If you had given us a third option, another college and continuing to pole vault, then, by all means, I would have chosen that one. It seems to be working for you.</p>
<p>Studies show that high level athletes, when giving up their sport, undergo a sense of loss, ending up depressed or in trouble. Your history is not great on this, thus the recommendation of replacing it with another pursuit that has been successful for others I know in roughly your situation.</p>
<p>Many of us had idealized our first loves, hung onto it far beyond where we should have and we see you making that same mistake. But with experience comes wisdom; we share that with you freely. Take it for what it’s worth.</p>
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<p>TLDR (sometimes tl;dr) is “too long; didn’t read”</p>
<p>… but I skimmed enough to be confident in my answer.</p>
<p>OP…there is something I have always told my children, and that is</p>
<p>“when you need to ask the question, you already know the answer.”</p>
<p>You, and your question, are a prime example of the principle.</p>
<p>You already know the answer. You know it’s wrong, you know you are wrong, and I strongly suspect you know that there is something wrong with you when it comes to your fixation with this girl.</p>
<p>You won’t be capable of being happy until you get yourself some help. Living in a one-sided fantasy is not healthy.</p>