Is my essay too general?

<p>I have written a first draft of my essay, and it's about me cleaning my room. What I do is I talk about clothing in the first paragraph, relating it to how I've struggled with my body image. Second paragraph is about books and my love for reading, third is about papers lying around, and how my handwriting has changed, which I kind of relate back to how I've changed over the years, and I end it with a little verbal snapshot of my room and how it makes me look back, reflect on my past, and that I look forward to the future. </p>

<p>Is this too general and vague? Wow, now that I've summarized it.... it doesn't seem very good. :/ Any suggestions as to how I could improve it? What do you think of the overall topic?</p>

<p>In my opinion the topic is too general and non substantive. I'm not sure exactly where you would be going with the essay, but through your summary I wouldn't be impressed but what you are writing. Think about what you love or passionate about and write about that. You have to make yourself stand out from everyone else. Remember they read thousands and if you become "part of the crowd" you get lost in the crowd.</p>

<p>I think that just describing it probably undermines the essay itself a bit, especially if it's one of those, creative/abstract/symbolic-type essays, in which case I think it has a chance of working. Otherwise I agree, it's a bit too vague, it dabbles on too many topics and doesn't focus on one. I also agree with the previous should be something more unique in content if it isn't unique in style.</p>

<p>If you want to narrow it down to writing your entire essay about one of your paragraphs, I think that could work. All three paragraphs on their own sound like they could make really good essays. </p>

<p>The most sentimental is number three. The most dramatic is number one. The most academic is number two. I can see why you may want to give a broad snapshot of much of your personality, but three different styles and topics in one essay may be a bit too much. </p>

<p>But write other drafts with other ideas and give them to an advisor to read or something.</p>

<p>Yea, I think I might just scrap this essay. I've started another one on a completely different topic. Though I like the idea about making one paragraph into a whole essay... if I did so, which do you think would be the best to work with?</p>

<p>My favorite would be number three, but that's probably just cause I'm a romantic nostalgic. And it kinda makes sense: you reflect on the past, look ahead and project into the future. At least for me that would be pretty easy. I saved almost EVERYTHING going all the way back to kindergarten so I'd have a lot to work with. You could even do a visual essay, if the common app formatting allows it (I think it's PDF, right, in which case you could). In fact I might do that right now and create a facebook album. Just make sure if you do this you don't get too idealistic and you don't be too specific about your future (there's a chance you could be a billionaire or a drug addict, who's to know?). </p>

<p>Body image struggles, though common, can be a big turn off depending on how extreme they were. This essay would be contrasted nicely with the handwriting essay because of its strong realism, though sometimes its better not to expose yourself so much. Although then again I'm just not the type of person that readily shares my inner struggles with strangers, let alone close friends. </p>

<p>The love for reading? Eh. Each adcom probably gets dozens of those every year. Could you make yours stand out? Hey who knows, but I think you'd have more work cut out for you than with either of the above two.</p>

<p>Drafts, drafts, deal dad a draft. Draw up another draft, and detect which is deluxe.</p>