I was always in a hurry to get ahead in the world. That is why I arrived early at five pounds and eight ounces, a bit premature and barely longer than the banana the nurses put beside me. Not long after I arrived in this world, I realized my life would be full of tribulations. It wasn’t the world that snatched away my warmth, it was the man that should have been my King. His howling, hatred, anger and abuse had devastating effects on my tender, innocent soul. The abuse continued till age four, until my mother was able to leave him. But, that wouldn’t be the last time I experienced his contempt and deep-seeded hatred, particularly for women.
¬¬¬¬¬¬¬¬¬¬¬Still in our adolescence, my brother and I flew to my father’s house like we did each summer. When it came time to leave, he refused to send us back to my mother. It was from then on I lived with him. Before my mother could save my brother and me, we were both placed into foster care. The day before, my teachers had spotted large bruises and welts that were inflicted upon my leg. For five years I endured the biggest challenges I have ever been faced with. Day after day, he tormented, bashed, and crushed my hopes and dreams. He once told me, “The only thing you’ll ever be able to do is roll over on your back.” The five years I spent there felt like five decades; the emotional, physical, and mental abuse forged a flow of tears within my heart. His abuse did not stop the kindling flame that was in my soul the flame that burned for the hope of going home to my mother. Five years later, I was liberated. I went home and never returned.
In retrospect of all that happened, I would not take back a single experience I have borne. It wasn’t me who had a problem, but my father. Although I did not understand his brutal actions toward me, innately I was somehow determined not to sink but to rise and in rising I have become a confident, intelligent, survivor. Unparalleled perseverance helps me continue to grow. I know that I can do all I set my mind to with certainty, determination, and positivity—all thanks to my father. The University of California Santa Barbara is a place I know that I can continue to blossom. I will thrive academically and emotionally and become one of the many proud students that call Santa Barbara their home. The school and community will provide an intellectually stimulating, thought provoking, and critical reasoning environment, which is something I strongly desire. Not only will the University of California Santa Barbara benefit me, but I too can give back to it and the community by becoming an active contributor to making each a better place to be.
Freshman essay:
It is sometimes the tragedies of others that bring greater purpose to one’s life. For me, it is Darfur, a region located west of the Sudan, a place filled with hopelessness and death for the weak and most vulnerable; a place filled with human suffering that was non-existent in my world until I learned about it on the news. I instantly felt a deep connection to its people while feeling hatred, anger and indignation towards the Sudanese government. Through that frustration, I felt compassion, love, and an overwhelming sense of empathy for the suffering people of Darfur. Having experienced abuse in my own life, I understand what it is like to feel vulnerable, helpless, neglected, and victimized. It was the memory of those feelings that motivated me to want to do something for the people of Darfur, because I also know the liberation of being lifted out of that hopeless state. Watching the events in Darfur, I felt a compassion that was imprinted on my soul, and wanted to do something to help. I began to raise awareness in my school and community because I wanted others know what was happening there; together we could create a change.
I did some research and found an organization located in Chad that supports Darfur refugees. I organized all the students who were moved to help, and began an awareness and donation campaign within our town. We all simply wanted to do something. None of us knew the impact it would have on us and the entire community. Our small town began to bond and work together, going door to door, raising awareness and asking for donations. I found public speakers who witnessed Darfur’s horrors first hand, who came to our school to speak to the student body, and we raised money within our school. We raised nearly $10,000 dollars to send to the people of Darfur, while educating ourselves and our community about the tragedy there. I felt an immense sense of fulfillment knowing that we were doing all we could to help.
It is now 2014. Darfur is no longer featured in the news, replaced by other crises and other atrocities; but genocide, racial cleansing and murder are still daily occurrences in Darfur, and its people are still forced to live in squalid Chadian refugee camps far from home. Unlike the nightly news, I have not forgotten. Taking part in this project transformed me and I became a better version of myself. Life became less and less about my past and more about helping others. I used my own experiences of despair and vulnerability as fuel to help those who endure even worse. One day I hope to do more by traveling as an aid worker to the Chadian camps. I was freed from abuse and despair in my life, and will use that gift as an opportunity to help others in return.
Please feel free to give me any advice on these. These are copyrighted and are my property, do not copy my ideas as they are original and my personal experiences.