<p>2 years ago, DD was the first one in our family to apply for a 4 year college in US. I did a lot of researches and had very decent knowledge about the procedures. However, I had no understanding of how good one must be to get into a T20. </p>
<p>So I was concerned and pushed DD hard to get higher test scores. </p>
<p>From the experiences, I learnt that once you reached certain level, a slightly higher the GPA and/or test score really does not matter that much. It is how the student could show his/her uniqueness vis essay and letter of recommedation that make a student stands out. </p>
<p>So, for this round, I made up a list of about 10 colleges and why I think they fit DS well. I passed that list to DS and tell him it is 100% his call. From there on, I only checked with him a couple times as how are things going. I do not know the final list of school he would apply nor did I ever read one sentences of any of his essay. I strongly believe that when they apply to the college they like, their application will be with passion and show trueness.</p>
<p>I am much more relax instead of worried. Because I know with confidence that he will get into at least one college in which he will receive a great education. </p>
<p>Big congratulations to all ED/EA “yes”. To everyone else, I share with you that in May, everything will work out o.k.</p>
<p>I am not sure if the second one is easier. I think I was more ignorant, but less stressed(ignorance is a bless). I just assumed that D1 would be able to get into one of her top choices. It all worked out at the end. But now I know what I didn’t know before, I am guiding D2 differently, but I am having a bigger knot in my stomach. I almost feel D1 lucked out that she is where she should be, and I am worried D2 may not be as lucky. D2 saw what D1 went through, so she is working even harder to make sure she is not disadvantaged in anyway. I am the one to tell her to relax. No, I don’t feel it’s easier.</p>
<p>Congratulations, Dad II. You are sounding much more relaxed and happier.</p>
<p>For me, round 2 is far easier. It isn’t because I know any more, but rather that the kids’ goals and desires are different. My son was looking at some very competitive schools and ideally wanted a merit scholarship to one, but was extremely busy his senior year and also just plain does not like to play “games”; he was not about to spend his life polishing essays and trying to make himself sound like a perfect fit in the eyes of admissions people. It worked out great, but I spent too much time annoyed at what seemed to me like a lack of effort on his part.</p>
<p>My hs senior daughter, on the other hand, wants to be a large animal vet and is interested in undergraduate majors like animal science and wildlife biology. Not only do we not think it is worth dumping 50-55 K a year on those majors, we are thinking about having to pay for vet school. Unlike son, she isn’t in the running for very big merit money from very good schools. She is already in at most of the schools on her list and has merit money (not huge) from an OOS public that she likes a lot. Not prestigious, but a very attractive place to her. (Too far away for me, though.)</p>
<p>I’m enjoying the lack of stress. I’m enjoying not having to worry that her favorite admission will turn out to be something that we cannot afford, also.</p>
<p>As someone who read many of your panicked posts over your daughter, I say: kudos to you for adopting a new approach with your son! I am sure you are right that he will get into a great school.</p>
<p>I think we’re more relaxed with the second but more because of who she is and what she wants. My older daughter was applying to top schools and Musical Theatre audition schools so it was very stressful, my younger daughter is looking for schools with no “requirements” and optional SATs/ACTs. My biggest concern for her is to find a school that is not too girl heavy as many of these kind of schools tend to be.</p>
<p>Definitely easier 2nd, and now 3rd time around! With my oldest, I panicked, thinking he had to follow the old rule of applying to at least 5 colleges, with reach, match and safety. I was a shrew, hounding him about his applications, helicoptering, I’m sure
It all ended beautifully, and it would have anyway without my constant nagging!!</p>
<p>With 2nd and 3rd, I totally let them take the lead. They decided what they wanted, applied and were accepted - one and done, end of story. </p>
<p>Life is much less stressful at our house!! :D</p>
<p>That is terrific to read, Dad II! Good luck to your son. It really is a mindset change from thinking it’s all about the grades / scores to understanding that it really is about the whole picture, and that once a certain level of intellectual achievement is there, a few points higher on the SAT doesn’t make a difference.</p>
<p>Second time was easier, because Kid No. 2 was better able to figure out what he was looking for in a college, so it was easier for him to build a list that made sense.</p>
<p>Still, some stress was part of the equation (more mine than his).</p>
<p>I’m only on #1 right now, but I’m fairly certain #2 is not going to be any easier. The education I get with #1 is just not going to transfer, because the two kids could not be any more different. Their grades and test scores are different, their interests are different, their strengths and challenges and desires are very different. And #3 is different in a different way. I’ll probably be here soaking up the great advice for years!!</p>
<p>I guess I feel even more stressed because D2’s aim is just as high as her sister’s, if not higher. She is more high strung than D1, and would be a lot more disappointed. It really depends on a kid.</p>
<p>OldFort: I hear ya DD1 has done well and is happy with her list, but in the end decided not to go the HYP route, mainly due to weather and distance. She danced with Yale for a while but then decided that she’d keep them on a list for grad school.</p>
<p>Now DD#2…I don’t know. She’s only a freshman and things change so much in 3 years. But she already has a stronger GPA than her sister and she tests well so I think she’ll end up being a more competitive candidate. I’m hoping it’s going to be “easier” since we know the ropes (i.e. the SAT II requirements won’t blindside us) but I think the admissions results process may be more trying. Or then again, maybe she’ll stay a homebody and remember how much she hates the cold too. Trying not to pre-worry about #2 when #1 hasn’t arrived on campus yet :)</p>
<p>My first was a recruited athlete. My second is not. Seems like nothing transfers … it’s a whole different process. I did know that with S1 … that his experience was completely different from what most college applicants go through … but it seems that everyone expects me to feel experienced and calm with S2. I’m not!</p>
<p>Not exactly easier. S1 was a computer guy and stellar student. The only weakness was how his ECs would be evaluated - 2 in school both academic, outside huge amounts of time spent on the computer some of it doing fairly impressive stuff. The list was easy to put together, especially after he said all he cared about was top academics and a good computer science department. He got into RPI early with money which was nice, then came 2 EA deferrals including one from his first choice. Then the looong wait till March - lots of rejections followed finally by some acceptances at excellent schools.</p>
<p>S2 went in with no idea about what he wanted. I started the visits a little earlier and determined that small and rural were out, urban schools without campuses were also out. History and international relations got the nod. The idea of DC internships became appealing. He has an excellent CR score, not so excellent math and writing scores on the SAT, uneven GPA, though he somehow made it to the top 6%. So putting together a list was a bit nervewracking - especially since the obvious matches got nixed. His final list was 7 reaches and 2 safeties. He really liked one of his safeties. Georgetown deferral was followed by a U of Chicago acceptance and whatever happens from now on will be fine. He’ll have good choices and it’s now obvious that his quirkiness and personality comes through in his essays and recommendations. Big sigh of relief!</p>
<p>As mathmom and I have discussed, we have two sets of twins; one from each set was delivered to the other at birth. :)</p>
<p>S1’s application process was a breeze. Essays flowed smoothly, he loved editing them, had EA acceptances from his #1 and #3 choices, lots of amazing stuff happened senior year. Like mathmom’s older S, my S1 cared about the academics and the quality of the math/CS departments. Chose the less-obvious school, too and has thrived.</p>
<p>S2 has had a different path – mainly via an extremely demanding academic program which I am finding eats its young by burning them out. Has fought for every GPA point. Also a history/polisci/IR guy. Pushed pushed pushed and wrote some fabulous essays in October and got a Georgetown deferral and UChicago acceptance. (Like I said, separated at birth!) He had 12 schools – three likelies, seven low reaches (as Stats Eval viewed them) and two bigger reaches. Has already sent apps to four, is likely to send out 3-4 more, including his #1 and a couple of LACs he likes. Chicago is very high on his list and so he is now working from a position of strength – he feels all his work has finally come to fruition. This guy has been on the 88-89 cusp in a couple of subjects all through HS, PSAT 218 and not NMSF, etc. He finally got his break.</p>
<p>It’s a very different process this time around. Stress (S2’s and mine) is a much bigger factor.</p>
<p>Absolutely NOT. Certain things are learned. So in that sense it is easier. But the stress does not diminish. Waiting to hear is equally difficult no matter what kid.</p>
<p>At first, it seemed like #2 was going to be harder. While looking for schools for DS1, DS2 insisted that he would absolutely go to a different school than his older brother - which was fine with us.</p>
<p>However, once DS1 chose his school and enrolled, and DS2 had a chance to experience the school a couple of times (at DS1’s move in day and a football game), DS2 announced that he wasn’t going to need to go to any campus visits because he wanted to go to the same school. I did insist that DS2 apply to a few more schools, which he did. He just finished his first semester at his brother’s school. </p>
DD1 has done well and is happy with her list, but in the end decided not to go the HYP route, mainly due to weather and distance. She danced with Yale for a while but then decided that she’d keep them on a list for grad school.</p>