<p>HG - stay out of the fight over there and it would probably just go away. Much of that stuff is written just to provoke you and others who bother to argue - I doubt it’s any real indication of how anyone would feel if presented with the real life circumstance.</p>
<p>It’s internet culture.</p>
<p>At least it’s not Slashdot or /b/.</p>
<p>I have to say, HGFM, that you are a paragon of class for what amounts to running to the adults for assurance of your own maturity, when your opinion is not an indication of your maturity. It’s just an opinion.</p>
<p>^^^ zamzam, I just read that post 3 times. I still can’t decide if you’re praising HGFM or slamming her.</p>
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<p>Without being too offensive, she came “here” (where she spends most of her time, judging by post count and so on) to get some approval from a more mature crowd that she is better than the rest of the “kids” her age. It’s not so much about getting away from juvenile responses are feeling superior and mature compared to everyone else.</p>
<p>^^Bingo. </p>
<p>I read through a lot of that thread, and while there were some guys making truly disgusting remarks, there were also many people posting thoughtfully.</p>
<p>HGFM is not going to get any support for her antichoice position from me.</p>
<p>Okay…I promised myself I wasn’t going to post again on this thread, but I’m getting just a little tired of all the negative things being said about me.</p>
<p>This is a PM I sent to ZamZam last night during a discussion we had. </p>
<p>This is after ZamZam saying the same…ie that I was just looking for assurance of my maturity.</p>
<p>I respectfully disagree.</p>
<p>I really was trying to include parents…however, I was already emotionally high-strung because of the attacks some of the pro-choicers in the college thread were throwing at me and the others who were arguing the Pro-Life side of the argument. Not to mention I was having a fight with my sister at the time. So when the disagreements started back up, I sort of just…snapped.</p>
<p>I also wish you would’ve read all my posts in the original thread. I’m not strictly pro-life, and I’m DEFINITELY not antichoice. For myself, yes. However, I have a friend who called me in tears the other day thinking she was pregnant (she just recently lost her virginity) and asked me to go with her to get a pregnancy test (she cannot drive and I can). She also told me that should she be pregnant, she’d want to abort the baby, and asked me to go with her should that happen. I told her that I did not agree with abortion and that I recommended she explore other options should she be pregnant, but that I would go with her for moral support and I would still love her. Imagine both of our relief when the test came back negative and she started her period a week later. I believe abortion needs to be legal, and would not go against it when the mother has been raped, incestually attacked, or would be in danger of losing her life should she carry the baby to term. Or even if she’s just ready to be a parent, although that reason for aborting still bothers me just a bit.</p>
<p>What bothers me are the girls (yes, I know of them, and there are more than one) at my high school who have had 3+ abortions and yet are not on any sort of birth control. And almost 100% of the time, the boy(s) they’re involved with have no idea the girl ever even got pregnant. THAT is shirking responsibility, THAT is what bothers me, and THAT is what I was referring to. I probably was not clear enough, and that is my fault. I’m sorry if what I said offended you. Truly.</p>
<p>I also really appreciate the respectful way in which you stated your opinion. But, like I said, I respectfully disagree. I said some things in the heat of debate that I probably shouldn’t have, but now after calming down, I hope my stance is a bit more clear.</p>
<p>I think most of you in the Parent Cafe know me pretty well. This is just a VERY touchy subject for me, because I was an unexpected pregnancy and I hate to think what would’ve happened if my mother had decided she didn’t want another child, and because I’ve seen what abortion has done to the girls at my school. I’m sorry if I was out of line or offended anyone, but I was never “running to the adults to get reassurance of my maturity”. And I want to make that perfectly clear.</p>
<p>HGFM has a personal relationship with a bunch of the parents here. Myself included. If she was disturbed, confused, frustrated by what she read and needed to talk about it, fine with me. I don’t necessarily have to agree with everything stated/posted by someone I care about, but the OP was clearly a conversation starter. We can all disagree, debate, whatever, but HGFM has a very clear history as kind, thoughtful, intelligent young woman and I, for one, won’t take kindly to any implication that she doesn’t belong here.</p>
<p>“she’s never been the same since.”</p>
<p>Maybe because she felt so anxious about being judged harshly for her actions and/or any ‘mistake’ that led to that. Maybe she anticipated correctly that some would condemn her. Maybe that has clouded her demeanor & made her depressed.</p>
<p>Just possibly.</p>
<p>I can’t say that I fall either way with the abortion issue. I’m just not sure.</p>
<p>My biggest beef about the whole thing is the double-standard in play surrounding it…</p>
<p>If a woman decides to have an abortion, she has it and that’s that. She made a decision and the fetus is destroyed.</p>
<p>On the other hand, if that same woman was to be attacked and killed while carrying the fetus, the person that killed the woman would be charged with two murders. One for the death of the woman and one for the death of the fetus.</p>
<p>If ending the fetus ability to develop is murder in one case, it should be murder in both cases, right?</p>
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<p>That’s not true everywhere. Abortion is a very tough, painful, personal issue and it’s fine to be conflicted and pained by it. I would worry about my own kids if they could come to a philosophy on abortion without a little agony.</p>
<p>Hops_scout, I do not believe that it is universally true that the law allows someone to be charged with two murders if they kill a pregnant woman. I know that there are some cases–usually highly-publicized ones like Scott Peterson–where this has been talked about. It always seems more like a prosecution publicity ploy than anything else to me. Perhaps there is some standard around viability.</p>
<p>In any case, even if it IS possible for such a charge to be brought, it shouldn’t be, IMHO. </p>
<p>By the way, when Everett Koop was the Surgeon General, they did a study on the psychological effects of abortion on the woman. Much to the dismay of the Reagan Administration, which wanted the study as antichoice ammunition, the results showed that there was no negative effect. (Obviously, individuals may differ, but this was looking at the statistical mass of women who had had abortions.) Koop displeased the right wing by not quashing the results or altering them to suit.</p>