it's alot, but making for a better stats eval

[aroundmyway]

<p>Ethnicity/Race: Caucasian (Middle-Eastern/Arab-American) Male
Eldest Boy of Nine Children
Location: Michigan
School:
Public/Attend Half-Day Magnet Program for Advanced Courses(Must be admitted)
Rank: 1/406 (2/406 after the midyear report)
Major: Biology
Current Culmative GPA: 4.3 W/ 4.0 UW (3.99UW after Midyear Report)
ACT: 32 With an 11 Essay
SAT Subject Test: Math Ic-800; Math IIc-800; Biology -710</p>

<p>Leadership Positions:
-Football Team Captain (9th)
-Business Professional Historian (10th)
-City Beautiful Commissioner (11th)
-Link Crew Leader (11th-12th)
-Student Council President (10th-12th)</p>

<p>Extracurriculars:
-Football Team- District Champs 3 years in a Row (9-12th)
-Harvard Crimson Business Internship
-INTERACT (community service organization) (9th-12th)
-Business Professionals of America (10th-12th)
-Link Crew (mentor to 9th graders in school) (11th-12th)
-National Honor Society (11-12th)
-Student Council (9th-12th)</p>

<p>Community Service:
-INTERACT- Various Stuff - 70 hours
-Link Crew Leader - Mentoring - 40 hours
-Helping out with translating and tutoring arabic kids in Detroit during summer - 200 hours
Total : 400 Hours</p>

<p>Awards:
-All State Football - Academic: Top 11 football players with the highest grades in the state.
-1st Place - (Captain) Business Professionals of America Website Design: 2
years in a row (2005 & 2006).
-2nd Place - Science and Engineering Fair of Metro Detroit; abstract of
which was published in a book by Villanova University at NCSSSMST symposium.
-City Beautiful Commissioner
-Homecoming King
-Hugh O’Brien Youth Leadership Award:One student from each school chosen to represent school at leadership symposium.
-Voted Most Likely to Succeed
-Rotary Youth Leadership Award: One of three students selected, based on application process, to represent INTERACT chapter at leadership symposium.</p>

<p>Summer:
Every summer I attend football camps, but in addition to summer football camps I have participated in:
-Community Service- (9th)
-Attending University of Michigan Medical Academy (only 50 students from all of Michigan are selected) (10th)
-Harvard Summer School (11th) and Business Internship at Harvard Crimson (11th)</p>

<p>Job:
Car Wash Manager 30hrs/Week (Mostly Weekends)</p>

<p>Recommendations (They gave me them to read them…lol):

1. Language Arts Teacher - Great Rec -Great Checks- Great Description - Last Line "He receives my highest recommendation.
2. Science Teacher - Mediocre - She gave me all the best checks possible on Common App, but I feel her writing was lacking in describing me
3. Counselor - Great Rec - Showed everything I had accomplished - Best Checks Possible on Common App- “He truly is one of ____'s best and brightest.”</p>

<p>Essay Snippets: (I like to tell stories, and I add humor in my own voice. Each begins with a general introduction then later my own perspective is added)
(My Language Teacher Loved Them All - Said all were very revealing of my personality)</p>

<li>Short Answer: Described my Unique Job</li>
</ol>

<p>“Maybe it’s the aftereffect of the industrial soap talking, but there is truly an art to the car wash business. Lazily toss your pushbrush over the surface of the car, and you’ll do little but spread dirt already present. Abrade the car and you’ll find yourself paying for a new paint job. The desired car wash lies somewhere in between…”</p>

<p>I then gave examples of my duties and what it meant to me.</p>

<li>Showed life in a family of nine children.
"The nine persons with Santa in the photograph on my fireplace are not his reindeer. Sure, the two-year-old girl’s nose is red from a cold in the picture, reminiscent of Rudolph’s, but I assure you that’s where the comparison ends. There is no way that the reindeer can be as peculiar as my family. </li>
</ol>

<p>It doesn’t matter that we are Muslims or that Santa is for Christians. It is tradition. Every year, from the eldest sister Ashley to the toddler Taylor, we stroll into the mall to have our photograph taken with Santa Claus, a process that will take place regardless of the most vehement protest…" </p>

<p>I then went into the actual experience this year.</p>

<li>Showed Life as an Arab Muslim in Today’s World
"You can smell the familiar gridiron aroma – mud, bluegrass, and dandelions all evident, but the magnitude diminished. The once imposing field goal posts no longer resemble an entrance to battle. Incessant shouting from fellow classmates ushers no excitement. The scene is just not as captivating on an empty stomach. To the city of Dearborn it may be T-minus one hour to game time, but to me it?s the fourteenth hour spent without food and water. </li>
</ol>

<p>So begins the Islamic holy month of Ramadan – a month of daylight fasting – and, as luck would have it, just in time for football season. However, the institutions of fasting and football do not commingle as easily as their calendars may…"</p>

<p>I then went into discussion about how it affected me personally.</p>

<p>Mid-Year Report (How much weight do they really give this?):
DCMST:
-Calculus II at Univeristy of Michigan- Dearborn:A
-Forensic Science at DCMST:A
-Anatomy and Physiology at Henry Ford Community College: B+ (My First Grade other than an A, it was a BIO 233 class with a bunch of 30 year olds, and I was the only high school kid)
Regular High School:
-AP Environmental Science:A
-AP Literature/Composition:A
-World Civilizations:A</p>

<p>I was thinking that given my family(being eldest boy of nine), background(middle-eastern), my well roundedness (football, job, homecoming king, ranked 1-2) and my essays showcasing personality/heritage would boost my chances… what do you think? Should I be looking for an acceptance this end of March or not?</p>

[JP321]

<p>Forget it. God already has the job.</p>

[aroundmyway]

<p>^...? </p>

<p>Plenty of Views.. Few Replies...</p>

[joyogunx]

<p>how could you be student council president 10-12 grade?</p>

[chicagoboy12]

<p>hahahaha PLEASE tell me you didn't list that you were voted "most likely to succeed" on your application!</p>

[gouchicago]

<p>
[quote]
we stroll into the mall to have our photograph taken with Santa Claus, a process that will take place regardless of the most vehement protest

[/quote]
</p>

<p>
[quote]
However, the institutions of fasting and football do not commingle as easily as their calendars may

[/quote]
</p>

<p>Aren't you pushing the whole Muslim American a bit too far? </p>

<p>You seem to be a talented applicant; hopefully you'll get in.</p>

[kingmo1990]

<p>i am going to have to second gouchicago...there's a very fine line between describing hardships (as being a muslim in post-9/11 america can often be; i am a muslim as well) and how you overcome them, and hyping hardships in what can to the admissions committee seem as exploitation of your situation, perhaps playing the system. i hope you were able to do more of the former than the latter.</p>

<p>otherwise, your grades and scores are top-notch, and you seem to have good ecs and essays</p>

<p>Good Luck!</p>

[undisclosed]

<p>Yeah I'm gonna repeat the current feeling. I talked to a retired admissions guy (from Brown) and he said that while its perfectly ok to have your ethnicity be a big factor of your applications essay (after all it is a big factor in your life), some just throw it out there, turning it into a "pity" angle hoping to get a "guilty white guy" (his words, not mine). Its a big part of who you are yes, but it has to lead to more.</p>

<p>For example I think they'd look more fondly on an applicant who founded an arabic culture club, or was part of an event meant to break ethnic barriers than on one whose sole motivation was "life is harder for me because of my color so let me in".</p>

<p>Still, you have very good stats.</p>