@dbandmom wrote: Anyway, I think we’re all looking for some reassurance sometimes. And this isn’t a “my kids got a record deal and headed to LA” dream come true story. This is just a music kid hustling for gigs and teaching some lessons and not starving to death. Hopefully that will bring comfort to any of my fellow worry warts.
Here is reassurance from a parent of a “kid” with middling success after almost 2 years out of school (MM VP). No big success here. But no big failure either. It’s just the day-to-day hustle of being a musician/artist and paying her rent, bills and now health insurance (just did that transition a couple of months ago). My D does say to me on occasion…I can’t believe I’m making it as a working artist.
In many ways, the transition has been better than I “feared” (trust me, my expectations were pretty low for money and success in the arts…right or wrong, they were). It has also been different than I thought. As a parent, you look for a path that you can share with family and friends over a cocktail…and as soon as I see one and get my “speech” ready…the path changes. It seems like the deck is being re-shuffled every 3 to 6 months…as she “finds herself as an artist/musician”…meaning gets hired and paid.
If your kid been cast/hired/gigging in high school, college, summers fairly consistently…that will continue (bc why not?). And, as long as responsible, she will figure out the cash situation if performing/teaching alone doesn’t cover the bills (as in my D’s case). There are always low level jobs available to fill that purpose…and they are not hard to get. And she won’t be alone…her “tribe” will be doing the exact same thing…and they help each other out. I know a TON of “kids” doing this between 22 and 32…they are my D’s friends…and none of them live at home!!
My D does a “bunch of stuff” on social media now about the transition from college to “real life”…recently asking what was different than expected to her friends. One consistent remark was … to keep yourself very open to where performing takes you…who will hire you…don’t put yourself in a box. Many commented that when they left college, they had a path in mind…and all said that went out the window within a year as the rubber met the road…and they started getting hired (or not) and passing from one opportunity to another. A strong arts community, good networking/marketing skills and being willing to put yourself into some “awkward attempts” seems pretty universal. And the old “be yourself” NOT who you think they want…was a key to getting hired mentioned often.
I think that this transition does parallel the college search in that it is scary and exciting at the same time…but at a DISTANCE…thank goodness! A parent can only take so much. My D entered college as a young, green performer and came out completely transformed into a true artist. Now she is going through another transition of becoming a working artist.,and yes it’s different (what skills are marketable). But it’s all good…and the music continues.