Now, this is might be a very weird post, honestly, but here goes…
My roommate and I are now second years at university. We are both international students. She is from China and I am from Greenland. Anyway, she just recently did a language program in summer to where she, in my opinion, speaks fluent Japanese even though she was only placed in 2rd year Japanese (4th year is the highest). On top of that, she made many new friends there, as well as adding another language to the other languages she knows. Now, she decided to learn the language I am still trying to learn. While she spent summer in Japanese school, I spent a part of summer trying to still learn my 4th language even though I barely improved at all. For some reason it bothers me. I mean, good for her for wanting to do it but somewhere deep inside I wished I could just do something that she didn’t. She literally does everything I do but better. I don’t know why but it’s infuriating. This all seems trivial, I know
She literally talks on the phone and switches up Chinese and Japanese a lot and it makes me sad that she’s so good at Japanese while I stink at Russian. We literally learned the languages at the same time and she speaks it like a native. Im a big fan of learning languages so this fact infuriates me when it shouldn’t. When her friends come by the room it’s the same thing, except this time, I can’t help but feel awkward as I sit on my bed while her and her mates are chatting away in Chinese and Japanese.
And also, people seem to like her more. She has very bubbly personality and happy and all while i am more calm and sarcastic. I tend to try to talk in detail and provide info which probably makes my conversations sound boring. I know she struggles with things but academically and socially she excels. She also has a great fashion style. Like i said, this post is weird, but I can’t but feel so jealous of her, her proficiency in many languages, and the way people are naturally drawn to her. Not sure what to do, it’s really taking a toll on me mentally. Yeah, I want to stop but I am so anxious about it, I can’t help but think about it all the time. Sorry this is so long…thoughts?
As someone who is unilingual, I find it difficult to sympathize with your competency in “only” four languages.
With that said, I think that your envy is a bit petty - it is clear that both of your are talented intellectually. Knowing multiple languages is an incredible feat, especially considering the fact that you learned these languages outside of your own upbringing. It is natural to feel some jealousy towards people who seem to have it all but it is important to remember that everyone is fighting their own battles. No one is perfect. I’m sure your roommate has her own struggles that she can disguise quite easily. If you continue to obsess over your roommate’s perceived perfection, it will drive you to madness.
If you feel this way then why not try harder to learn the language. It sounds like she spends 24/7 trying to learn Japanese and the other languages. If it is taking you so long in your oppion to learn them, then why not talk to your teacher and have something set up to help you get to the level you want.
I took Japanese in high school as well as tried to self teach myself and I had a hard time managing my time learning the language, but there was this one kid in my class that new the answers just like that and I too was jealous. I wanted to be able to be that fluent too,but I still managed to pass the class in the end, but even now I can barely form sentences, luckily before I graduated I copied the lessons on my flash drive and bought a Japanese textbook, so that way since I have more time and I can go back to it when ever I want.
So manage your time better, study, and let her be your inspiration to do better. Also don’t be sarcastic all the time, people probably think you’re a douche
I will give you the same advice I give my daughter. There will ALWAYS be someone better, more talented, smarter richer, more popular, … then you. HOWEVER, there are also people looking at you as that person that is better. It is all in your point of view. Compete against yourself. You have your own strengths and talents.
As others posted, your roommate is not perfect. She appears to have a gift for language but she also has weaknesses. We all do. We just don’t showcase them.
@WonderV Japanese and Chinese are close. It’s easy for a Chinese to learn. Also, Chinese love to watch Japanese animations and movies which rise the skills to a new lever and good for memory. But Russian is no way close to English. It is a mixture of Greek and Slavic. Also, you don’t watch Russian TV shows or movies I guess. So keep calm and don’t be jealous. Maybe you would do better if you had chosen to learn French and German.