<p>I am just curious…When your daughters are going out either with friends or dates do you ask for details? I am finding that I am much more protective or my beautiful daughter then I ever was with my sons. Do you ask for names, phone numbers…just wondering what others do?</p>
<p>While in high school–Where, when, with whom, when do you expect to be back, and please call to let me know if there is a change in plans. For informational purposes only. </p>
<p>No need for phone numbers–kids take their phones with them.</p>
<p>I doubt I’d be different with a daughter than a son, but the questions are routine:</p>
<p>where are you going, what are you doing, when will you be home, please don’t be home later than (insert curfew time) and call if something changes or you need to be picked up. </p>
<p>No need for phone numbers with cell phones…</p>
<p>DNA sample and GPS tracking.</p>
<p>To avoid appearing sexist, I would probably tell all my kids that I expect the same info.</p>
<p>My parents want names, where I’ll be, what I’ll be doing, when I’ll be home (answer: before dark). If it’s with people they don’t know well, they’ll ask a bit about the friends’ families (what their parents do for a living, where they live); they like being sure that I’m hanging out with ‘decent’ people, and I get bonus points for hanging out with other doctors’ kids. And they always ask what the male/female ratio is going to be.</p>
<p>I’ve found that with my brother, they ask the same basic info but don’t ask about his friends’ parents or home lives as much. And they don’t ask about his friends’ sex.</p>
<p>By the way my daughter is beginning her junior year of college.</p>
<p>BCeagle…That is how I feel…lol</p>
<p>I had to laugh Teenage Cliche-My son was at a “decent” person’s house- a neurosurgeon- very well respected in our community. I found out he was up stairs asleep the whole time kids were there drinking- he bought the liquor!</p>
<p>“DNA sample and GPS tracking”…lol…</p>
<p>you laugh; we have a friend who put a GPS tracking device in his daughter’s car (17) after he found her somewhere he didn’t want her to be…</p>
<p>to the OP: as a junior in college, my daughter tells us where she is going as a courtesy (she’s very considerate of that) but that’s about it…they live alone all year without reporting in; can’t imagine the who, what, when, where and how during the summer…</p>
<p>The rising senior in HS; completely different story…ellemenope said it best…</p>
<p>When my kids (one (D) in grad school, one (S) half way through college) are living at or staying at my house, I expect to know where they are going and when they will be back. I would expect the same of any household member or guest! It is simply basic consideration. When they are on their own at school, I do not expect to know where they are at all times, but do hope to be informed of any overnight trips.</p>
<p>I have never given either a curfew, and neither has ever needed one. They are both quite responsible, not drinkers, etc. Younger one (son) has a local girlfriend whose father is rather strict, so he handles that! ;)</p>
<p>DNA sample and GPS tracking.</p>
<p>This.</p>
<p>Are we talking about in high school or after?</p>
<p>I ask that they let me know if they are going to stay overnight somewhere- otherwise I ask that they be home by midnight- just cause I wait up.</p>
<p>Older D has lived away from home most of time since going off to college- Younger D same- since leaving high school. ( summer after high school- she was a residential camp counselor- then working two jobs- which left her with not much free time- off to India- then back to work at the summer camp again then off to college- this summer will be different as she isn’t working at the camp- but her best friends are off to study abroad or internships)</p>
<p>With the cell phone, it hasn’t been much of an issue with my d. When she lived at home, I asked her to call me by 6 pm every day to let me know whether or not she planned to be home for dinner, and then if for any reason she wasn’t home by 11 to call again to let me know her “plans”. Now that she’s on her own, if she is home visiting I will casually ask – but it in a way that expresses interest rather than an attempt to control. (I mean… if the kid is intent on doing something their parent won’t approve of, then then they probably would be willing to lie about it as well.) I used to also ask her to let me know if she was going to a movie or someplace where she would need to have the cell phone off for awhile, in case I tried to reach her. </p>
<p>Once she was off to college, the only thing I did was that if I happened to know she was out late at night, I’d ask her to give me a call when she got home so I’d know she was safe. </p>
<p>D. has traveled all over the world and sometimes the only contact was via occasional text messages, so I’m pretty much resigned to the “no news is good news” philosophy.</p>
<p>Where she’s going, and if there will be anybody named Van der Sloot there.</p>
<p>I too am more protective of my daughter than I am of my son. It just makes sense. S is 6 ft tall and 200 lbs, and fairly cautious by nature. D is 5’ 5" and 115 lbs. and pretty enough to draw attention. Add the fact that she’s somewhat trusting/gullible and optimistic/naive, and it’s worrisome. At a recent wedding, a young man she’d never met before asked her to dance, and 5 minutes later D was following him outside to see the view from a dock that was across a dark field, next to a river and a huge forest. I had to send her dad after her to bring her back. At 18 I thought she knew better! Kind of worries me about her going to college next year.</p>
<p>But back to the original question - I want to know where she’s going, with whom, and when she’ll be home. I also expect her to check in if there is any change in plans. As I said, she’s 18 and just graduated hs.</p>
<p>When S is home from college I still expect him to tell us where he’s going and with whom, and when he thinks he’ll be home. And I expect him to call us if he’s delayed coming home. It’s the same courtesy his dad and I give to him and his sister if we’re going somewhere.</p>
<p>My daughter is heading for junior year of college. I only ask where are you going? It is expected that if she plans on staying out past 2 AM, to text me the that fact, so when I wake up in a panic because all the lights are on, I know where she is.</p>
<p>When she’s at college, I have no idea of what is going on or where she is, so I try not to act like I need to know everything.</p>
<p>We only have boys, but it’s still pretty universal. Where are you going, what are you doing, who will be there, what time do you expect to be home. Call if there are any changes. S2 is a newer driver so we remind him that he is not to have anyone else in the car. I may ask questions about a kid I haven’t heard before but it’s more to be able to put everyone in context. (ie, oh, they live near girlA, and are friends with BoyB & are on the math team with you… now I can remember who they are.)</p>
<p>All of our boys have been told that they are never to get in a car with someone who has had alcohol. They may call us for a ride anytime with no questions. We are not going to rat out their friends, we just want them safe.</p>
<p>As far as GPS, you can easily ‘ping’ their celphones to locate them. I haven’t, but my kids don’t know that, and they certainly know I can! :)</p>
<p>I don’t have daughters, but I ask the same questions as others of my sons. Not only that, but if my kids are home and I’m going out, I tell them where I’m going and when I expect to be back. I don’t know if they listen, but if I don’t show up, it’s nice to think they might have a clue which direction I was headed in. (I’m out with clients a lot.) I’ve got Latitude running on my phone - of course once it had my dh placed in the middle of the East River (we were a few blocks inland) and another time had him in Beijing when he was in the Bronx.</p>
<p>^^^^ You made me laugh!!!</p>
<p>If their GPS locator is on? </p>
<p>Aaargh! Don’t even get me started. I am not sure if I am ready for my D to date.</p>