kids friend stole credit card

<p>Ok I just got off the phone with my friend. Her sons friend stole her credit card and has used it. They have reported the card stolen and there are over $600 in charges. They had suspected the friend, and the son looked in the wallet and saw her card, but did not confront him. </p>

<p>Now the question is what should she do? The son has been friends with him for over 10 yrs. The parents live in another state now and would be caught off guard by her calling them. Yet, if she doesn't call and knows who is using it is she responsible to the credit card company for fraud?</p>

<p>I think that she should inform the credit card company that she "suspects" a certain person and provide identifying information -- and let the credit card fraud department take care of the rest. It may wreck a friendship, but it is better in the long run for the kid who took the card that he gets caught. If the kid does not experience real-world consequences now, the behavior is likely to continue and get worse. </p>

<p>In any case, what kind of "friend" would do that? Would you want to stay friends with a person who stole from you or your parents?</p>

<p>I agree with Calmom. My mother went through something similar, yet different. She visited someone's home with 3 other women. One woman brought a young teenager with her (a relative). The teen allegedly stole something of value from the home. There was a confrontation, denial (the item mysteriously did turn up again, but I won't post the location here). The relative of this girl did not speak to the other women for nearly a year, and things are still not the way they once were (she wanted the people who were present to take the child's side). Hopefully, a lesson about honesty and consequences was learned.</p>

<p>I don't get why the friends son didn't take back the card and say, DUDE!!!</p>

<p>She needs to call the credit card company and she needs to talk to her son as welll</p>

<p>She'd better call the credit card PDQ or she'll be liable for all those charges. I'd get a new card, too -- no telling if this kid has saved the number on his computer or shared it with his friends.</p>

<p>I'm sorry your friend's son has to deal with this betrayal of trust.</p>

<p>Most credit card companies have a limited time frame in which one can report fraud -- and if you know it has happened, I think the time frame is something like 24-48 hours.</p>

<p>I worked at a cash register many years ago. If she's reported it stolen and he tries to use it again, doesn't the cashier have to keep the card and call the police? So maybe he'll be caught very soon?</p>

<p>"They had suspected the friend, and the son looked in the wallet and saw her card, but did not confront him. "</p>

<p>Was it fear of retaliation from the "friend?" Did her son elaborate on why he did not confront him?</p>

<p>The parents didn't want him to say anything. I love my friends son, but I was surprised myself. I think he wants to try to keep the friend. It has been his best friend for a long time, which is sad in itself. This is a family that has taken him with them every year for @ 7 yrs to the beach on their family vacations. He celebrates every holiday with the family, since his across the country. He has even flown with the son on trips (Dad is an airline pilot) so they have given him free passes. They have treated this child as if he was their own.</p>

<p>As far as the cashier, yes they are suppose to, but I think the kid has probably stopped using it, since he knows the family, I am sure he knows when they noticed it missing and stopped then. I don't think he realizes that they will get a new number, but might think he can use it once they get the new card.</p>

<p>First of all, I hope by now the family has reported the card lost/stolen and requested new numbers. </p>

<p>I have personal experience with a loved one stealing things like this. My brother had a drug/alcohol addiction in high school, and we didn't realize it (yes, we should have seen the signs ... but we didn't). He took items of value & pawned them, and he stole money, etc. The worst was when he stole some valuable figurines from a favorite great aunt while visiting her across-country. She was crushed that he would do that to her. The thing is, he loved her very much. He wouldn't have hurt her for the world ... yet he did. His greatest regret is that she died before he straightened himself out & made amends. I wonder if your S's friend could possibly have a drug/alcohol problem that he needs money to feed? This may explain how someone who is "part of the family" could do something like this. It's not an excuse, of course. If it's a reason, though, perhaps confronting the young man might make him face what is going on in his life. Actually, no matter what the reason, this might not be a bad idea ... the family should sit the young man down & talk to him. He is on a self-destructive path no matter what. It might help him to be confronted now.</p>

<p>A few years ago, a student on a nearby college campus was stabbed to death in her dorm room. It ended up that the killer was another student whom the student had considered a close friend. Both of their families also were close friends. </p>

<p>He had stolen her bank card, and had been using it at automatic teller machines. He killed her the day before she was to go to the police to identify who had been photographed at automatic tellers using her card.</p>

<p>Bulletandpima, please tell this story to your friend. The police need to be involved, and the young man whose card was stolen also needs to protect himself.</p>

<p>Wow, NSM. The world is a scary place, isn't it?!</p>

<p>Bullet, it may seem twisted, but is there any possibility that the reason your friend's son did not confront the other kid is that he himself took the card and is using "I saw it in his wallet" as a tactic to forestall further action by his family, knowing that they are unlikely to turn the kid in?</p>