<p>I was downstairs in my grade K cousins room earlier, and i saw this sign on her wall. there’s a drawing of a green person, and a drawing of a regular person… and a drawing of some money… with a note. this is what the note says:</p>
<p>Dear Leprechaun,</p>
<p>Give me all of your coins so that I can give them to my mommy becuse she is pore.</p>
<p>Love, KM</p>
<p>I thought it was hilarious. She spelled leprechaun correct, but got because and poor wrong. </p>
<p>So i thought i’d start a post for funny things kids have said/done.</p>
<p>When my son was in first grade, his class celebrated the 100th day of school by completing a packet on the number 100. Included in the packet was a page on which the kids were supposed to draw a picture of themselves at 100. My son drew his own gravestone.</p>
<p>When my son was about 8, he came into the room and asked me to play a board game with him. I told him no, I was ‘busy’ (well, freecell is addicting!). He opened up the game and quietly started playing both sides of “Chutes & Ladders” by himself. I was feeling guilty for not playing with him, and finally told him so. He answered: “You think you feel guilty? I’m cheating!”</p>
<p>When my younger s was in first or second grade, I was visiting the class after having been that week’s “secret reader” (a parent comes in to read a book to the class). They were doing a unit on the weather and the clouds at that time. The teacher asked " What makes dew?" A small voice from the back of the room answered “dogs”. :o</p>
<p>I was 12 and my little sis was 3. We were taking our very first plane trip, from Palm Springs to Seattle. We found out seats, I was on the aisle, and Ginny was in the middle next to an elderly woman. Ginny stood up on her seat and began fiddling with the air conditioner vent. The elderly woman leaned over to us an said (in her sweet, old lady voice) “Would you mind not aiming the cold air at me? I have hurt my back and the doctors don’t know what’s wrong with me.” Ginny sat down, looked earnestly at the wrinkled woman and sincerely asked, “do the doctors know what happened to your face?”</p>
<p>klmcpa, that reminds me of my niece at the grocery store with her mother, my sister. We’ll call my niece “Kathy”. Very precocious, very rambunctious , say anything to anybody, never met a stranger, spoke in complete sentences (Unlike me. LOL). As my sister was waiting in line to checkout after a particularly trying time keeping up with Kathy, my 4 year old niece spies a “little person”. An attractive, well dressed female in her twenties and exactly Kathy’s height , maybe even an inch shorter. </p>
<p>As my sister tells the story, Kathy is out of arm’s reach before sister sees Kathy’s intended destination approaching, and then the panic sets in. Thoughts race across my sister’s mind at warp speed. "Oh,God. Oh, Jesus. Please. Help me , Lord. I can’t get there in time. Oh, God. Please. Just don’t let that child say anything to that woman. Let’s make a deal!! "</p>
<p>The checkout area was crowded but as my niece bounds up to her prey, and lands directly in front of her with a perfectly executed jump-stop, she can be clearly heard to say,“Hey. You’re short. I’m as tall as you are and I’m only 4 years old”. My sister thinks momentarily about leaving the grocery cart unmanned and running away, childless. Maybe no one will notice - thinking maybe she could adopt in a few years. The lady smiles at my niece and in a clear and firm voice says “Yes, dear . But I have my own car and I can stay up as late as I want”. With that, the lady made her turn and walked on down the aisle, leaving Kathy open-mouthed and for the first time, wordless.</p>
<p>My D said one time her math teacher was passing out a test for them to take, and told the class, “May the force be with you”. A boy piped up: “And also with you.”</p>
<p>When my oldest d was 2 and a half years old, a favorite plaything was a plastic set of barnyard animals. One day, she flipped over the cow, pointed to its nether regions, and asked, “What’s that?” “Those are her udders, where the milk comes from,” I replied brightly. Flipping over the bull, she asked, “And what’s that?” Well, there was some vague protruberance there, and deciding to take advantage of a teachable moment, I gave her the anatomically correct word.</p>
<p>Next day, her great grandparents were visiting for lunch, and she brought the cow and bull in to the dining room. Holding the cow over a tea cup, she said, “Now the cow will give us some milk.” Then, holding the bull in a similar position, she announced, “And now the bull will give us some peanuts.”</p>
<p>Laughed till we cried. I miss this stuff! Grandmotherhood will be wonderful (when the time’s right, of course).</p>
<p>That story reminded me of my earnest friend who disapproved of baby names for body parts and taught her children all the proper anatomical names. One day her four-year-old walked down the stairs starkers after a bath with Superman bandaids wrapped around his private parts. Trying not to laugh, she asked, “Did you hurt yourself, Mark?” “No, Mom… I’m Super P e n i s!” Ah, they start young.</p>
<p>that reminds me of something one of my friends told me. he has a niece (she’s probably about 5 now), and when her little brother was born (2 or 3 years ago), she came to the realization that her brother had a “tail”. So she’s sitting on my friend’s lap, and she turns around and asks him if he has a “tail.” he was like, what is a tail? and she says “it’s this weird thing connected to boys”… i just about died when he told me that.</p>
<p>When my son was very very young, he liked for me to fold my hands into the “Here’s the church, here’s the steeple, open the doors and see all the people” thing. I did it so many times I finally got tired of doing it, so I folded my hands one more time, but this time, instead of having my fingers inside my hands, I had them outside, interlocked with each other. Then I did, “Here’s the church, here’s the steeple, open the doors,” and I opened my hands… “But where are the people?”</p>
<p>He laughed hysterically and said, “They’re all on the roof!”</p>
<p>When oldest S was about 12, he needed a typed report for school, and our computer was on the blink. I pulled out my old electric typewriter. D - then 5 - watched in fascination and said, “Cool! A keyboard with it’s own printer!”</p>
<p>Our older D went through a period between 2 1/2 and 3 1/2, when she was never herself, she was always a character from a book or movie. It usually changed daily and sometimes mulitple times within the day. We had to check to see if we were having breakfast with Dorothy from the Wizard of OZ or perhaps the Ethiopian from How The Leopard got His Spots.
One day we were in a shoe store and an elderly woman asked her “What is your name?” D smiled up and replied, “The kitchen maid” (from The Emperor and The Nightengale) . The woman looked agast and I, while trying not to burst out laughing, suggested asking who D had been yesterday.</p>
<p>WE lived down the block from a cemetary. One day when youngest s was about 3 he said, “I know why they bury people when they die”. Since he was the third I just asked “Why?” The answer… well otherwise they’d be lieing around all over the place.</p>
<p>We lived in Canada until my son was 8. Shortly after he started school in the US, he came home with a grade of 30 on a money test. I asked him what happened, and he pointed to the pictures of US coins and said “all those funny little heads look alike.” I asked him if there was anything else in school he wasn’t familiar with. He thought for a minute and said " who is Aloisius, and why to we say a pledge to him every morning?"</p>