<p>i didnt mean that she borrowed the money for a frivolous reason, the reason was significant…but once that problem was taken care of (by money borrowed), the issue of repayment didnt seem to be a priority rather the dinners and vacation were</p>
<p>parent56 - my comment was not directed at you. I would be upset in your situation too. That’s what usually happens when we lend money to people, and that’s why I lend money to relatives/friends I just assume it’s a gift.</p>
<p>probably the best assumption to make oldfort, been there, done that too</p>
<p>I had a close friend who charged around $1000 at my shop and one day I loaned her $400 cash that she used to pay her live in help. She was quite comfortably well-off, net worth wise, but was having some cash flow issues. I was not worried.</p>
<p>After I sold the business I was prepared to write off the charges as uncollectable, but I still have never forgotten the $400. That was 1993!</p>
<p>It’s not even the money as much as the shock that she thought that was okay. I have also loaned money to relatives that was paid back on time with interest. I do think having it in writing and never saying something like “when you can” is critical to make sure you are on the same page! I saw them a few years ago and wondered the entire time what they were thinking- they have waaaay more money & assets than we do.</p>
<p>^^ It makes you want to approach that person for a ‘loan’ of $400 to see if they’re as willing to return the favor. The terms can be that you’ll pay back the $400 immediately contingent on them paying ‘you’ back the $400 that you loaned to them.</p>
<p>^^My bet is that friend has no recollection whatsoever that she borrowed $400.</p>
<p>^^ Yes - the condition of ‘convenient amnesia’</p>
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<p>Woman is returning to the city and will be working for husband once again in a few weeks, if I understand OP correctly.</p>
<p>If she has “the balls” to ask, hubby should have the balls to say yes or no. And if he says yes, it should be on paper, and a reasonable amount deducted each paycheck. Terms should be finalized on paper before any money is loaned. The idea that if she doen’t pay- we’ll take it from her salary is ridiculous. Work out terms beforehand, don’t try to create new terms and conditions if all doesn’t go as one hoped. If borrower doesn’t like that, then she can borrow from someone else. No hard feelings.
If hubby doesn’t have the business sense or the balls to handle this in a business manner then the problem is with the hubby, not the potential borrower. If he hurts his wife by being too good to a borrower, then he really isn’t being good to people is he?</p>
<p>Good grief, your husband sounds like a good man. If she worked for your husband for 10 years, sounds like she is a loyal employee and I would think he would know what he is getting into. It’s people like your husband that are VERY rare. It is not easy for a divorced woman get back on their feet. There for the grace of God go I or you or your daughters.
If you are that concerned, just explain to him, that you would feel more comfortable with a promissory note signed by her and/or a payroll deduction. it can even be structured as a relocation expense and written off on taxes.
Not everyone is out to screw someone over. She just may be genuine and in need of a “leg up.”
Pay it forward.</p>
<p>milkeandsugar, well said.</p>
<p>I wanted to add that putting it on paper and giving her reciepts as she pays back protects her as well. Life is strange, things happen. It’s in everyone’s best interest that a loan be well documented.</p>
<p>You say you’re tight on cash, but she has also been his right hand man. $1500 is not a lot of money to lay out for an important employee. Why don’t you suggest your husband co-sign a loan with her? Also write up terms that repayment will be direct deposited to the bank from her check. This way your husband can be the hero, you won’t lay out cash, she can decide the length of time she needs to repay, her credit rating can be improved, and the loan will be repaid.</p>
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That’s effectively the same thing as just handing her the cash.</p>
<p>It’s the bank’s money, not their present cash on hand. Snowball would not be out of pocket at all unless the employee quit before repaying the loan. With a 10 year history with the company and her present divorce situation, she will most likely stay the year or so needed to repay the loan from payroll deductions.</p>
<p>Would it be bad manners to point out that $1,500 wouldn’t cover even one week’s expenses at most of the private colleges we all love? And if we’re going to adhere to the “business is business” mantra, why not structure the $1,500 like one of Montel’s payday loans … loan her the money until payday, she pays you back the loan amount plus $149.</p>
<p>(Yeah, jk with the last part. IMHO you should do what you’re comfortable doing. There’s obviously no approach that will satisfy everyone.)</p>
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But it’s the ‘not paying it back’ that’s the concern and a very real possibility.</p>
<p>NewHope, I think your math is a bit off 
Approximately 52 weeks in a year times $1.5K makes the cost of attendance or your hypothetical college approximately $78K per year! Even with the recent tuition hikes, I do not think we are there yet. :eek:</p>
<p>I appreciate all the thoughts and suggestions. We have decided to go ahead with the loan, with payments coming out of her paycheck. I don’t know if my husband will go as far as to ask her for a signed agreement, but he does understand that this woman needs to understand up front that payments will be made.</p>
<p>For those that did not understand, this woman did work for my husband for 10+ years and left when she moved out of town for less than a year. She is returning to town and my husband’s office in the next few weeks to work. Because I have know this woman and I know she is going through a tough time, I understand my husband wanting to help out. You have to know my husband to know he would give the shirt off his back to someone in need; he always sees the good in others. Me on the other hand, always looks for the bad!! I am sure this will all work out; I was just taken aback that she would ask us at this time for money.</p>
<p>I hopefully will update you when this loan is paid off!</p>
<p>You are lucky to have a husband like that. My husband is the same way, and sometimes I do think he is too nice. At the same time, my husband also makes me a nicer person.</p>
<p>^^^ BB - My math CAN’T be off … my livelihood depends on it! I was calculating based on a nine-month academic year.</p>