<p>emeraldkity, I’m still laughing from your bazooka joe post. I don’t want to keep reading this thread and get depressed.</p>
<p>I forgot I had a dr appt. I’m back.
I didn’t want to be depressing, but what I wanted to say, was that, while my d may appear to some to have a blessed life, there are things that most people don’t know. </p>
<p>I think that is true for everyone.We don’t know what other burdens they carry.</p>
<p>Yep , EK, it’s all in context.</p>
<p>Hope your particular stuff is ok soon.</p>
<p>OP, you seem to be a thoughtful and compassionate person whose sphere of concern extends beyond yourself and your own family. Thank you for posting.</p>
<p>“I think that is true for everyone.We don’t know what other burdens they carry”</p>
<p>So right. Looking at people, some assume because they appear to be well off or attractive, that everything in their life is wonderful. Unless you know them well, you have no idea of what tragedies they’ve suffered, or as you say, what burdens they carry.</p>
<p>Compassion is not obscene. What I find (and I am not attributing this to the OP) obnoxious is rhetoric in a vacuum. Do something if you feel the world is “unfair”.</p>
<p>My parents had a number of friends who were of the leftist/social action group. One man in particular used to smoke his pipe (oh the 50s!) and look to the heavens and exclaim, “I weep for the world!”</p>
<p>And that was all he ever did.</p>
<p>
We are fortunate to live in a time and place where there is at least a good chance of this. </p>
<p>I have taken up genealogy as a hobby and am often horrified at the plights of various ancestors, for whom burying a child was apparently all too common, one unfortunate mother outliving 8 of her 10 children, most of whom died as children or in infancy or in young adulthood. We really cannot begin to imagine the suffering our ancestors went through. :(</p>
<p>“We really cannot begin to imagine the suffering our ancestors went through.”</p>
<p>I can’t even comprehend this. It makes you wonder why they even cared to be alive. So many children dying, people living a short lifespan, sometimes in so much misery. Maybe they thought it was a blessing to die. I don’t know. Perhaps it is what you become accustomed to, or perhaps they lived their lives very quickly, with no time to get bored.</p>
<p>And future generations will look back on us and say “oh those poor dears! Only living to their 80s. And without robots to assist them! I just can’t even imagine how hard life must have been.”</p>
<p>Or: “Those people ruined everything. We were only supposed to have a few children live to adulthood. Then they figured out how to let all 10 of those children live and now our world has gone to crap because they defied nature.”</p>
<p>Among other possibilities :)</p>
<p>Ellebud–but you have no idea what the poster has or has not done. can someone not voice concern with others without being greeted by derision?</p>
<p>Actually, we already know the answer to that.:rolleyes:</p>
<p>
My mom lost my sister when I was 8. She never began to recover and it certainly is the defining event of my childhood. I never want to walk in those shoes.</p>
<p>It’s me again, the OP. Ellebud is right. I ought to do more than just feel compassion for the unfortunate ones. Failing to do so is not right. I know deep in my mind that my moral compass is pointing in the right direction on this issue but inertia is keeping me from doing more than merely expressing sympathy.
Didn’t realize that this thread will get this many views and replies. Hopefully the posts in this thread will galvanize at least some readers into action, so others may benefit from their acts of kindness and benevolence.</p>
<p>I don’t know why one can’t see it both ways. There are people who are the victims of circumstances beyond their control, just as there are those who bear some or all of the responsibility for the consequences of their own actions or inactions. </p>
<p>Maybe the hang up is in the definition of the word “fair.” Everyone knows that life isn’t fair, but there’s no argument that some people appear more “fortunate.” While misfortune can and does sometimes pave the way for success, sometimes it’s just as much to do with being at the right place at the right time in one’s life (or in history), taking advantage of that and building momentum from there. Read Malcolm Gladwell’s book Outliers and you won’t look at the vagaries of fate,fortune and “fairness” the same way.</p>
<p>
Ah, but romani, we do only have a few children live to adulthood. We just don’t birth 10 in order to get a few who survive. For better or worse humans have all but taken over for nature in that regard ;)</p>
<p>It is true that life dishes out a variety of different experiences to everyone. I have the idea though that it is up to you to deal with what life throws at you in the best way possible. I think that your attitude is what makes your life in so many ways.</p>
<p>It is also true that so many things happen and there is no fault involved. You can’t blame yourself if there are accidents or illness. Sometimes life happens in a way that is really hard to deal with. It depends on how someone handles it though as to whether it is going to send them downhill or they will grow from it.</p>
<p>I like to think that i have grown from all the things that i have been through. It would have been much easier if certain things had not happened or if other things had gone differently. But i would not be who i am right now. If i had not gone through my struggles, there is so much that i would not appreciate. If you can appreciate the wonders that you do have in your life, no matter the position that you are in, then you have so much.</p>
<p>Only my closest friends and my immediate family are aware of how I grew up. If I were not born in the USA, I would likely never have had the opportunity to earn an education and build a good life for myself and my kids. College was affordable on student loans only, otherwise, I would not have been able to go. </p>
<p>I count my blessings every day. Life is not easy, but sometimes hard work pays off, and sometime we get lucky. That’s what makes life interesting and worth living. If we never had bad times, how would we recognize and appreciate the good bits?</p>
<p>People suffering from mental illness, and the all-to-common addictions to drugs and alcohol that result, make me appreciate my lot in life. If it weren’t for a healthy brain that allowed me to develop personal street smarts and vision for myself, I could easily have had a tragic and wasted life.</p>
<p>Sorry for the gloom-fest. Life really is what you make of it and how you react to what’s laid at your feet—as long as you have the basics of physical and mental health.</p>
<p>Life is not fair to many. I disconnected my iPhone before it finished syncing.</p>
<p>^^Oh, the horrors, polarbear. Puts it all into perspective, doesn’t it?</p>
<p>I’m deleting one letter from your title: Life is not fair to any.</p>
<p>Read War and Peace. Tolstoy noodled on this for over 500 pages and distilled his answer in the relationship between Pierre and Platon.</p>