@theloniusmonk i cocked my head a bit at that as well. It seems like the more proper way to put it as described would be politically liberal while socially conservative (social meaning personal interactions in social situations with others).
@NEPatsGirl Because this thread took an ugly turn and she would’ve taken some of those comments very personally. And I didn’t want her to. That’s why she’s not looking. Obviously she could’ve done it even though I told her not to but she trusted my judgment that probably wasn’t the best idea for her. People will message me with really good information and I forward those messages to her or I will copy and paste messages to her. She uses this board for other things but she’s not thrilled with the fact that so many people know so much about her. Because I was a bit unaware of how many people are following.
And she’s already conflicted about some things and she doesn’t need to read posts that question her character.
Although if any of you have a child like mine or feel like your child can relate to mine I would love for you to reach out to me and they can make a connection because I think if she had a peer who is facing the same kind of choices, it would be a much better place for her to be in. Her peers are not going this route and she’s not spoken to them about it at all. I got her to talk to her friend yesterday. The one person she had mentioned it to before kind of gave her a hard time…Asking why she would even consider applying to schools that were so expensive. It made her feel defensive. So she doesn’t have a peer group of kids like herself going this route.
@Cornellian88 I probably could’ve come up with a better way to describe it. I can see how it causes confusion. You’re absolutely right, it’s a much better way to put it. But I do find that she is a little bit conservative politically. She’s not alt left. I’ll be interested to see where she lands politically as she matures. She’s fiscally conservative in politics but not social issues. I would describe myself as sometimes more libertarian than liberal. But definitely more liberal than conservative. There’s some gray area.
I give her a lot of credit for not adopting and parroting my views which I’m quite vocal about. She’s figuring it out for herself. We had some lively debate on our house around the presidential election for sure.
We should probably skip the rabbit hole of the kid’s politics. She sounds pretty middle of the road for a college student – nothing that makes a difference in the schools on her list at this point.
@Momof2girlsandafrenchie Yes personal politics for most of us is patchwork quilt or seafood gumbo. And it tends to be a moving target even for us old folk.
If I were in OP’s shoes I wouldn’t want my D to look at this thread either. While much of it has been incredibly informative, there have been times when OP’s daughter has taken some personal hits based only on a single sentence or two from her mother. Some of it, I think, has been unfair.
For a sensitive kid (I have one of those too), that could be very upsetting. And unnecessary.
I wouldn’t recommend the kiddo read this thread either. Really…it’s the mom’s musings…and this is a better place for that to happen than in the family living room.
@Dancingmom518 You get it. And unless I have specifically said my daughter said…… it’s my thoughts, my views, my opinions. I don’t speak for her. And she’s a great kid, she’s a kid that you could rely on for anything.
She’s also a 17 year old girl…But she’s one of the kindest people you’ll ever meet. I have never in my life heard her speak ill of anyone. She offers grace to everyone around her. And at times she has been somewhat attacked because of what I said or someone perceived I said. Imagine feeling attacked by several adults.
At first I wanted her to read, and then it became ugly. She’s got enough to figure out. She doesn’t need that negativity in her life.
@Momof2girlsandafrenchie, she sounds like a great kid - be proud and yes, keep her away from misguided ugliness.
Please to all who are reading, she created an ID just now, she was reading anonymously. But she wanted to reach out to someone who has been with me for the beginning of this journey who always gave sound advice to give her thanks. And she’s ready to start engaging with other kids. If by chance you put two and together and realize it’s my D. I am respectfully asking you not to make her uncomfortable. I realize that many of you feel like you know her through me. And that’s been a gift and a curse at the same time. But I want her just to reap the benefits of engaging with other seniors. And she won’t come to this thread. If she reaches out to you personally it’s because she has gotten a message that you sent me and I forwarded to her. Then she opened the door and it’s ok.
But if she doesn’t reach out personally and you think it’s her, please offer her the anonymity.
I expect to see her engage in talk about the two schools that are real contenders. And that’s great for her.
I hope this post makes sense.
And I’m deliberately not posting her user name.
Just want to say as a midwestern liberal, Smith is really liberal! My D has thrived there, but yes it’s intense. And also, hard and pricey to get to. BDL is a smaller airport and there’s no public transportation from the airport to the school. My D has work study, all first years work in food service, and like a real job, there’s a gap between when you work and when you receive your pay check. My D had a good summer job so she went to school with $$. Luckily on campus there’s not a whole lot to spend money on!!!
I can’t saw with certainty that the emails won’t stop if you pull apps. The marketing emails are separate from the admissions office and take time to get in sync. It would be much more effective to unsubscribe because that is through the marketing firm directly. Or auto move them to another folder
^meant to say “I CAN say with certainty…”
Re: emails…one of my kids continued to get them even when he was a college senior. Luckily by that time, he was using the edu email from his college and seldom read them.
We got snail mail marketing from colleges for years after they graduated! (graduated college,not HS!)
I read through this post this weekend. You have an amazing young woman and I wish you and your daughter the best. As a parent of a 2nd year Smithie, I wanted to add that Smith is edgy and intense. It is not for the feint of heart. I add this not to discourage you but just to inform you since a visit may not be possible.
However, my daughter is not intense or political. Also, she doesn’t drink, smoke or party. I would call her sweet and kind. Also, fiercely independent and, okay, maybe a little edgy. But in a nice, non-confrontational way. She is a poet who waxes philosophically on topics that interest her. However, Smith has been a good experience as she has been exposed to challenging ideas and bold people.
I am not sure that the same person who would enjoy St. Olaf would enjoy Smith. Not that either school is better than the other. Just that the reported “intensity” at Smith is real.
Again, I wish you the best. You already have some very good choices!
This could mean someone who is in favor of (for example) legal abortion and legal recreational marijuana use but will not personally want to have an abortion in case of unintended pregnancy (or may be among those who actually do choose abstention to prevent unintended pregnancy) and has no interest in recreationally using any form of marijuana.
Think of anything you would never consider doing, but which you do not believe should be illegal, as an analogy. For many people, riding a motorcycle could be such a thing.
However, “socially conservative” is often a political description. “Personally conservative” would be a more accurate, less politically-loaded term to describe someone with conservative personal habits, but not necessarily conservative political views on social issues.
Glad we’re clearing that up
I’ve been MIA most of the week…but I have an update.
My D and I were having a late dinner, she glanced at her phone, looked over at me and said “I got an email. I have a status update from St. Olaf.” It took her a minute to open she was nervous…but She’s in!!!