<p>It is a sad day here. My daughter’s Spanish teacher, whom she had freshman year for Spanish 2 and now junior year for Spanish 4, died yesterday of complications from a stroke he suffered about 10 days ago. He was THE most lovely man–a veteran teacher with a wonderful way with the kids. Of every teacher she has had at her giant high school, he is the one she has connected with most. She is not a kid who necessarily stands out in class but he has given her a ton of encouragement on her progress and really made her feel valued. She had been planning to ask him to write a letter of recommendation for her for college. She felt he really understood her in a way few other teachers have.</p>
<p>I haven’t seen her yet since school but had a brief talk with her on the phone. She didn’t seem to want to discuss it, but that might have been because she was heading out the door. I really have no context for how to help her. I know it has been emotional for her at school and I am sure the kids are being offered all kinds of support. Should I wait till she brings it up with me, or gently guide her into a conversation? Should I encourage her to attend whatever services might be scheduled? I am sure the school will accommodate that. He was also the boys’ soccer coach so he touched the lives of thousands of kids and families over the decades. It’s just heartbreaking.</p>
<p>It is heartbreaking. Maybe she could send a card or letter to his family letting them know how much he did for her as a teacher/mentor. Writing her thoughts on paper will be comforting for his family and good for her grieving.</p>
<p>I’m so sorry, sally305. My son’s math teacher was killed while riding his bike home from school. It was the first week of school, so my son hadn’t really bonded with him, but it was very traumatic for many of his past students. The school ended up having a memorial service in the school auditorium. Every year there is a bike ride, called Ride of Silence, in his memory. </p>
<p>So sorry to hear about this loss. In many schools, students are encouraged to attend services (some of the smaller high schools around here actually close so an entire class can attend the funeral of a teacher). You may find that’s been organized by an administrator when your d goes to school tomorrow. If not, I think that attending as an individual is a very kind and respectful thing to do. I agree that a note from your daughter that mentions how touched she was by this teacher will mean a great deal to the family.</p>
<p>Sally, your daughter’s note will be so nicely received by the family. It will be heartwarming for them to read about this fabulous person, and the impact he had on his students. Very nice idea!</p>
<p>Attend the service with your daughter - the note is a lovely idea but don’t force her to do it and have her do it in her own time (I have found that writing a sympathy note a few weeks after the funeral allows me to better put my thoughts together) Keep abreast of what the school is doing - they might hold their own memorial type events.</p>
<p>I am so sorry, sally305. Your daughter and her friends, as well as the school staff, must be heartbroken. I really like abasket’s idea. It will be healing for your D and very meaningful to the beloved teacher’s family. ((hugs))</p>
<p>Our very kind science teacher died sudden cardiac death on a filed trip with some students. - so sad it was in september so the service was at the field at school because there were so many people that came. I went with D to the service. his wife had a fund raiser every year for about 5 years to support a hiking trail named after him. when we could not walk it to raise money we donated to it. so sad.</p>
<p>The letter is a wonderful idea. My dad was a teacher and a coach and we received some lovely cards and letters, as well as students and players attending the visitation. The family will really appreciate the kind words. As a student many years ago, I was really furious that my mom kept an important teacher’s death from me to keep me on task for finals week. It was hard to grieve alone when everyone else had known for several weeks. I told my kids I would always let them know if something good/bad/ugly was happening while they are at school. So far, I’ve only had to tell of something bad once.</p>