@thumper1,
Our kid cooks for his GF, not for us. When he is home, he prefers to be in his “kid mode” (or my wife WANTS him to be in that mode.)
I heard that when he went to a friend’s wedding rehearsal, he stayed in the kitchen most of the time because he noticed they had recruited someone who is very good at cooking for preparing the food for the rehearsal; he wanted to pick up some of the cooking techniques.
I love cooking for them and always have. Don’t mind the grocery bill at all because I know it means they are here. They cleanup after themselves but what I can’t stand is that dishwasher running constantly. And once filled and running, then more dishes appear in the sink. But I can’t stand paper plates. Oh well…small price to pay for the joy of having them around. There are 11 of us now when we’re all here for a few days.
And it never ends.
Re the laundry- quit doing college son’s when he came home. One break he raided his dirty laundry pile for clean underwear- he zipped down to the laundry room (near the garage- that stuff never made it past there). Boys/men can get away with that so much more than women. Years past college he visited for Thanksgiving- over a week of vacation and did his own twice just before his return as he was arriving home later at night and working the next day).
Food- yep, the milk runs were more frequent and some supplies dwindled while others I though would get used went untouched. I had forgotten some of his habits until I found myself checking the house for dirty dishes before running the dishwasher. I also got tired of cooking- first some of his favorites that are labor intensive (hence not worth it for two people) then the big dinner. There’s a vegetable dish I developed after he left home I did not honor the request for because I had done so much cooking and we had tons of leftovers that needed using (we freeze a lot of entrees for the two of us but these did not merit that). He’ll just have to come again. btw- visits are infrequent (once a year now) since we’re around 3000 miles apart now and working means not much vacation time anymore.
It was strange to have him here for over a week- his past visits were shorter. In some ways we fell into patterns from earlier years even though we moved far from where we were when he still had his address with us. It is different when the grown child is no longer financially dependent on parents. Plus we created a home for the two of us where he uses the guest room. Something he did when he first arrived that no other guest would do was to open all of the kitchen cupboards to locate things. He then was able to fend for himself a lot (which meant waking up to find some things were used up that you thought would last when you went to bed). He was 3 hours different from his time zone and needed to catch up on sleep so his hours were more nights than mornings- just like a college student! He had been here a time or three before but we still had local places to show him.
For kids now visiting the nest instead of living there it can be an easy, comfortable place as most of us still have the familiar stuff from their years with us. We’re downsizing, not adding furniture, kitchen things et al. Although, we have replaced some worn out furniture, but it is the same familiar style as our tastes have not changed since becoming empty nesters.
I expect those with kids home for about a month they will be more than happy to say goodbye. The first weeks are hectic with the holiday season and catching up. Wonder how many parents will be just as happy to have the kids go back to college as they are in a few weeks…
With the exception of Christmas Day, I let them fend for themselves for breakfast and lunch, but I do try to organize a family dinner.
My S is the only one in the family that enjoys cooking with me. H and D have absolutely no interest. Although D made the vegan pizza for us one night so I did not have to cook. Last night S and I made Gordon Ramsey’s “Ultimate Steak Sandwich” using filet. It was incredible and everyone enjoyed it. He just left to pick up the ingredients for Ramsey’s “Roasted Chicken with Chorizio Stuffing” for tonight’s dinner. This kid loves to eat (hockey player) and he happily will assist in the kitchen. I love that time with him.
I have really been on both my kids this break to clean up after themselves - they are getting too old to be expecting someone else to do it. Both are very challenged in the neatness arena and I have to stop myself from going into their rooms. I am totally the opposite.
I’m jealous of you all. My S took a seasonal job at a fancy cafe and comes home with his own creme brulee and the like and my DS is in NJ with her bf :(. I’ve got more tamales and ham than my H and I could ever hope to eat in this lifetime. The dogs are the ones making out lol
I am so happy that they all came that I don’t mind cooking or cleaning. I have learned to delegate chores though.
I stocked up with food before they got here but need to restock a bit. DS loves to cook and has some opinions about what kind of food he wants, so he will cook for himself plus extra and the rest of us benefit. I don’t mind the clean-up since he’s doing the planning and cooking.
Also, we use the Holiday China between Christmas Eve and New Year’s, so that’s fun. And it goes in the dishwasher, because dishes that are too much trouble to use might as well go straight to the dump for all the use they are to me. If they fade in the dishwasher after a few years or a couple of decades, so what?
I’m with 3bm103. Not thrilled with the dishwasher, but won’t use paper plates. We have plenty of dishes.
Everyone pitches in to help…except main meals which I do cook (I did Christmas eve this year, but there were only four of us).
$375 on groceries, wine, and staples Christmas Eve and then I had to go, again, yesterday, for something or other that we missed! This is for a family of THREE! It will be a relief to eat a salad.
Right there with you OP! At first I enjoy doing one rotation through all my college S’s favorite dinners, but that covers like a week to ten days. Now what? To make matters worse, he has some kind of Snapple peach tea addiction, and we go through cases and cases. I enjoy cooking and appreciative eaters (college S probably likes my cooking best), but the planning starts to get annoying. Especially when the grocery store is jam packed for the holidays.
@conmama…love this thread, as I do many of yours! I am ready for my routine, but not missing my kids. Can’t have it both ways, so I’ll just try to be zen about it. Mess? What mess? Lol
Still jealous of yall as I am missing mine, but one thing I do find annoying when they ARE home for breaks is that I always presume they want home cooking with all the fat and butter. Instead, they ask for kale this and fat free that. I mean I’m all for eating healthy but it’s not much fun baking and and grocery shopping if one trip down the vegetable aisle will do it for them lol.
Many of my guests left yesterday. Today, I toasted myself a bagel. That is all the cooking I’m doing! The remaining kids are on their own.
I’m also finishing up that leftover Cava from yesterday’s brunch.
I’m still enjoying it, but D flies home tomorrow. She eats out all the time in NYC, so she has been completely uninterested in eating out while home. Tonight we’re making matzoh ball soup.
All good. Other than the chicken legs that look like they could have given a turkey a run for its money. Seriously, I can’t imagine how big the chickens must be if 4 chicken leg quarters weigh nearly 6 pounds!
And yes, the kitchen is going to need a major, major scrub down tomorrow.
OMG, the constant washing of the dishes made the dishwasher warning signs go away! 
We use it so infrequently that some parts start to dry out, hence the warning sign.
I don’t mind the cooking. But I really don’t want to see my electric bill!!
I don’t mind the cooking either but it is much more enjoyable for me when I have a partner to cook with. Thank goodness for my S!
We recently upgraded our pipes and the plumber kindly removed the flow restrictor in the shower head. Pure bliss after years of poor water pressure. I didn’t much think about the cost ramifications because it’s just hubby and me at home these days. Well…we had 5 of us home for much of this month, and several of us (them!) enjoy 30 minute showers. Should be interesting…
We went from 2 to 6 for several days. I am frustrated by the amount of food we will throw out. Normally if I make a “big” meal including a ham and mashed potatoes, for example, we would eat it for a few days. But because of our schedule this year, we have thrown out more than a reasonable amount of food. And the kids seem to eat less than they used to, plus I never know what their new “thing” is going to be. One son who used to live on milk and pizza, has decided to go healthy on me, which is great, but unplanned for. Said kid asked for a loaf of whole wheat bread, sliced, from the deli. The entire loaf will go in the trash tomorrow. He had good intentions. My boys used to eat tons of mashed potatoes. Now they hardly touch them. I will still miss them when they go away.
@1214mom would you and your H not eat the whole wheat bread?