<p>I ended up living on campus across town from home, eons ago. I called home once a week and only went home for dorm closings- after all, I would have ended up back on campus for fun. A top public U is better than most private U’s (although not some of the most elite)- you should be able to be challenged, especially in the Honors program. Discount your friend and enjoy the freedoms of being a college student at a good U.</p>
<p>You’re so lucky to live close to a great university. Make the most of it.</p>
<p>Dear Grade13: Since you said that you read every post, I will add mine. My son is currently at the local flagship State U. It was not his first, second or third choice, but due to necessity he is there. He had a fabulous year, was invited into the honors program, met great (and very bright ) people. Yes, he runs into kids from his high school (13th grade) but that is fine. He does not love it, but he never loved any school (fortunately he still does well). He is receiving a very good education, (by his own admission) has great opportunities, and it is all up to him. </p>
<p>Some of his friend’s situations: a few attend Ivy’s, a few private schools, some in far away locations, one has just completed his first year at community college, Nobody looks down on anyone else, where they go to school is not the first priority when hanging out with friends.</p>
<p>Go and make the most of your opportunities. Professors are always looking for great students with which to interact.
Remember only approx. 25% of all people in this country graduate from college, any college.</p>
<p>Adding to my previous post:
My S goes to college a 15 minutes’ walk from home, as do some of his high school mates. Over the last couple of years, he’s waved to them on campus but he has not been in a single class with any of them. Because of the huge range of classes available in any college, it sure does not feel like grade 13! He’s also been involved in ECs that are quite different from what he used to do in high school, so he’s made a whole lot of new friends while keeping in touch with old high school friends.
Since you will be living on campus, I expect you will have a very similar experience. And your story illustrates what somebody told me: the best students at state unis are equal to the best students at Ivies–since some pass up Ivies to attend state unis. You will find others just like yourself. Look forward to meeting them and forget about your immature schoolmates.</p>
<p>Grade13 - I think you’re going to do great no matter where you are! You sound like a bright level headed girl who will make the most of whatever she is. I’m sure that you will make lots of new friends and maybe they will be more down to earth like your family and less like the friends you now describe as snotty. You may actually be headed in the direction that you were meant to. Get excited about this new chapter in your life that is about to begin!</p>
<p>I remember a searing remark way back in high school from a good friend who was accepted into the honors program at Top 3 school. I was going to a top 50 national, and was discussing academics while we were home on break. She informed me that she really only likes to talk to so and so about schoolwork (another classmate, not extremely bright but a big bragger, who got in as a legacy to another Top 3), because going to their elite Ivy League schools was a completely different experience in a way that I couldn’t possibly understand. Ouch. She also liked to tell me that she was very “avant-garde” (and I guess I wasn’t).</p>
<p>The friend, who was truly brilliant, unfortunately went on to have a nervous breakdown (the term at the time) her freshman year at Top 3, and had to graduate later. Naturally, I was still there for her during her difficulties (whether she deserved it or not).</p>
<p>To make a long story short, I am way, way more successful than both Top 3 girls, personally and financially. I don’t mean to brag (like girl #2), but just wanted to let you know that when someone zings you, if you just keep working hard and try to be a good person you will probably end up doing better than them in the long run. I have found that more often than not, nice guys do finish first. I also bet that those of us who are zinged along the way gain extra inspiration and momentum from it.</p>
<p>I was going through a physical health problem soon after we graduated from college, and this old friend was not there for me. Another lesson, then, is that when friends make us feel bad, and are somehow a subtle toxic influence in our lives, it is best to recognise that as early as possible. It probably won’t go away.</p>
<p>My very accomplished hs son is attending a state school which is close to home, even though he got accepted to more prestigious private schools. He lives there and we don’t visit. He comes home on public transportation when he wants or needs to. In short, he has his own life there. It really depends on how you and your parents approach the situation. Is there any way you can live on campus? It is kind of a compromise because you have a chance to grow up and be on your own, but your parents can be comfortable knowing that you can come home if you absolutely need to.</p>
<p>Some hs students who went far away or to expensive private schools were home by Christmas. Also, anyone who is condescending about your choice is very superficial and just plain stupid. You can do great at your public university and go to that “ivy” for grad school. At least you know you’ll have the grades and the money to do so when the time comes!</p>
<p>Perhaps this is a regional thing, but the adults that I know in our “circle of trust” who are <em>successful</em> (meaning worked themselves into positions of power/wealth/what-have-you- not inherited wealth) have MOSTLY attended public state universities. That goes for our attorney, our doctors, several VPs of Fortune 500 companies, and many small business owners. Actually, I can’t think of anyone off the top of my head that I know of who went to a prestigious private, but that doesn’t mean someone didn’t. The point is, attending your “lowly public” as you put it should not keep you from achieving whatever you set your mind to do. </p>
<p>Depending on where you’re from, maybe you could do a test…do you know of many people in your community that are “movers and shakers”? Maybe you can use the internet to do a little research on the big wigs at your local corps, businesses, govt., etc. See if you can find their bios…I think you might be pleasantly surprised at what you find. Obviously there are areas/industries which will be the exception to this.</p>
<p>We don’t work there, but are in social circles with some of the professors at our state university here in Buffalo. Very impressive folks, always have interesting conversations. They are so high above “grade 13” it’s not even funny. You’ll be challenged. See if you can find out on RateMyProfessor.com or informally from students who are the good profs for freshmen. When you register, aim for them. It’ll get you off to a good start.</p>