<p>Reading through the summer festival posts, I just realized my son and I have made a major etiquette mistake. He’s a high school senior who applied to two festivals: BUTI and Aspen. He received word first that he was waitlisted for Aspen. He had attended BUTI last year and was offered an auto-admit and scholarship. We didn’t take the Aspen waitlist seriously because it is expensive and we figured, even if he got in, he wouldn’t get any scholarship money, so we accepted the BUTI offer and plunked down the deposit. Last week, he was notified that he was accepted off the waitlist at Aspen with a fellowship and had been placed in the studio of a great teacher. We were thrilled. His teacher recommended he choose Aspen, but when we told him about it, we hadn’t mentioned that he had already accepted BUTI and sent in the deposit. Just yesterday, he called BUTI and pulled out of the festival. I advised him to call rather than email, to apologize for the inconvenience and to explain that he thought the Aspen offer would be best for his professional growth. While I figured BUTI wouldn’t be particularly happy, I also thought that they would just contact their waitlist and some other lucky kid would get to go to BUTI. Now I’m reading that you should never pull out of a commitment, and I’m afraid he’s blackened his name forever. Any advise? I really didn’t realize this would be such a problem. Ack! I’m freaking out here!</p>
<p>Where are you reading this? It seems that if he forfeits his deposit, BUTI will take someone off the waitlist and he should be fine. Congrats on the fellowship at Aspen!</p>
<p>In this thread (around May 2009)–violadad and binx discussing:</p>
<p><a href=“Music Festival Master List - #76 by violadad - Music Major - College Confidential Forums”>http://talk.collegeconfidential.com/music-major/510498-music-festival-master-list-p6.html</a></p>
<p>I was thinking the same thing about the waitlist–that BUTI would just open the spot up for the next on the waitlist. My husband thinks I’m overreacting. I’m hoping I am–just went from feeling happy for my son to thinking that we did the wrong thing in accepting the offer from Aspen.</p>
<p>It’s tricky, but I think you did the right thing. The folks who run these festivals are pros and they understand these things happen from time to time. Also: BUTI is a festival you pay to attend, right? But at Aspen, a higher-level festival, he has a fellowship. My daughter accepted a place in a fellowship-funded festival this year and a week later heard from a festival where she’d been waitlisted. She declined the waitlist without considering it because she had committed to the prior festival. But the difference was that both were funded festivals. </p>
<p>He will be remembered as the talented kid who got a fellowship at Aspen. No shame there. Congratulations.</p>
<p>Thanks for the reassurance, both of you. I’m not sure what you mean by a funded festival, glassharmonica, but BUTI does charge tuition and room and board. My son was offered an auto-admit and half scholarship, and when the offer came, it was for 3/4 of the cost of the program–need-based probably adding to the half-portion. I’m not sure what will happen with the scholarship money he was offered. Perhaps BUTI will surprise someone who didn’t get a scholarship. I wish that I had understood that he was on the waitlist for the fellowship program at Aspen–I thought he was on the waitlist just to be admitted. Had I known, I would have gone throught the correct procedure and asked BUTI for an extension on the deadline. We won’t make the same mistake next time. Thanks again for your help. I’m feeling a little better. I hate to even think about being on the bad side of BUTI. My son had such a wonderful time last year, and we were so grateful for the scholarship that allowed him to attend.</p>
<p>dec51995, for some festivals everyone accepted gets a full fellowship–no tuition or housing charges. That’s what glassharmonica meant by “funded festival”. The ones that come to mind are Norfolk Chamber Music Festival, Music Academy of the West, National Repertory Orchestra, Tanglewood (there are more–there’s a thread somewhere about this). Aspen is not a funded program, except for those that receive a fellowship. Otherwise there is a charge for tuition and room and board. </p>
<p>Ah! Thanks for the clarification. And the reassurance. And the congratulations. I feel much better. <:-P </p>